KcK chu - delusion sketch
Fandom: Kamichama Karin chu
Title: delusion sketch
Rating: PG
Characters / Pairings: Jin/Michiru
Summary: The start, end, and in-between (but not quite, because there was so much left unsaid).
Dis/claimer: This is fanfiction. Nothing more, nothing less.
A/N: Used prompts from 1sentence (theme set Gamma) as writing practice. And these aren’t even one sentence, because apparently I wasn’t up for that kind of challenge. So in a way, this is me just messing around. Because I can. Yes.
Warning for probable spoilers, and everything else not making sense to some degree.
delusion sketch
#01 Ring
That was how they met, Jin realised. Something so small and insignificant - but it wasn’t, not really - had been the catalyst.
#02 Hero
Michiru saw through him easily, smiling that way until Jin huffed and turned away in a sulk.
So maybe he wouldn’t be the one everyone praised (remembered) in the end, but at least they could fight side by side.
#03 Memory
Eventually, always, it would blur and smear
something ugly and beautiful
and maybe he was scared.
#04 Box
“Dare I ask why?”
Michiru laughed as he closed the photo album; “You probably don’t want to know the answer.”
#05 Run
Maybe
maybe
may
m
He already knew it was impossible to get away. To close his eyes, cover his ears, and pretend none of it had happened.
#06 Hurricane
It was too much at times; chaotic, cluttered, stifling. So he reached out blindly, though he knew it was a useless gesture.
What he hadn’t expected was for someone to grab his hand and pull him out.
#07 Wings
If only it were so easy; if only if only
He would fly away from it all. His family, his problems, everything
And Jin laughed at himself, because it was childish and what had he been thinking. But Michiru did not laugh, and simply gave him a pat on the back; knowing, hearing nothing but hollow sound.
And maybe that was fine as well.
#08 Cold
“Remember, Nishikiori, it’s only because it’s so damn cold, got it? Alright, yeah, okay-”
“I heard you the first time, Jin-kun,” Michiru cut in with a yawn, “Go to sleep, love.”
#09 Red
It dripped, spreading across his fingertips until it seemed to consume him. Each time it happened, he felt as if he were drowning deeper, deeper somehow.
But they were nothing more than nightmares, Michiru had assured him.
He couldn’t say it (whose blood it was), and so continued to drown in his sleep.
#10 Drink
He stared at the cup in his hands; “I wonder why it hurts so much.”
There was no reply, though it was not entirely unexpected. Everyone else had already fallen asleep, and he seemed to be the only one left.
At least, until Jin stirred from his awkward position on the couch; stared at him for a moment, before groaning and twisting around:
“Doesn’ look right.”
Michiru stared at the idol’s back, head tilted, somehow curious. And while he did not expect any kind of elaboration, it seemed he would get one.
“Nishi’iori should smile more.”
#11 Midnight
tick-tock-tick
Seconds slipped by, faded and gone, yet neither moved.
#12 Temptation
Michiru had no idea why he’d leaned across the table at that moment; why he had pinched Jin’s cheeks, unable to stop the smile from spreading across his face.
“Now, now, is that the kind of expression an idol makes?”
#13 View
It’s too perfect, Michiru had said once, and Jin remembered asking why. But he could no longer recall the answer, as it blurred
muted colours, broken and torn down and built up again. That’s how we live.
#14 Music
“And why, may I ask, is it so funny?” Jin demanded. He watched as Michiru fought to control his laughter, wiping the tears from his eyes.
“Oh, it’s nothing, nothing really.”
Silence.
As Jin scowled, Michiru smiled in apology (or perhaps he was still amused), “Well, I can’t help but think you singing in English is ador-”
“Don’t finish that sentence.”
#15 Silk
Maybe Jin shouldn’t have been laughing so hard at Michiru’s battle costume, as he had seen it many times before. But they had almost died, and something had welled up inside and simply burst.
And Michiru was laughing beside him (perhaps for different reasons), so he guessed that it was fine.
#16 Cover
The battles they’d fought had long since blurred into one, incoherent memory. With no clear start or end - how many times they had been so close to losing everything - it wished to be left alone; forgotten.
But the glimpses of days long gone reminded them, still, how they never would have survived it alone.
#17 Promise
Just once, Michiru wished for nothing more than the truth; something that would not end up torn and broken, blackened by words and actions that opposed one another.
Perhaps he would never see that day.
#18 Dream
Green bloomed all around him. It was somehow perfect, but not, and yet he could not hear his own heartbeat.
He might have been searching for something, yet sleep brought no answers. That in itself was impossible.
#19 Candle
Maybe they would accidentally set the house on fire, though there was very little to actually burn. Either way, Jin was relieved that Michiru had thought to bring a torch along.
#20 Talent
He was good at nothing, ever since he had been a child. Mediocre at best, Michiru was content with that.
Jin refused to believe it, though; there was so much Michiru had done - continued to do - and he didn’t even realise it.
#21 Silence
“… Hey.”
The words rose to the ceiling before breaking apart.
“Hm?”
A pause; three heartbeats (or maybe more; his face was burning).
“Do you hate me?”
But he would not hear, as he feared the answer.
#22 Journey
How much further did they have to go? It dragged on, further and further, until he felt as if they were puppets on strings. He wanted to break from it, to do something unexpected, but knew he couldn’t.
#23 Fire
It burned, even now. Weakened, very soon it would simply die, smoke rising before the winds swept it away.
Jin watched it, waiting, glad that Michiru had chosen to accompany him.
#24 Strength
He couldn’t fight it any longer, even when a familiar voice called to him; pleaded to him, echoing echoing echo
ing
#25 Mask
No one ever saw the slight shift in his eyes, heard his words falter before adjusting. No, instead they saw what they expected.
In the crowd, though, there was one. One who raised a hand in a gesture that seemed to say Good Luck to the person behind the ‘singing teen sensation’.
And his heart seemed to calm, even as the sound blared around them.
#26 Ice
The cry of cicadas drowned out all other thought. Jin lay on his back, staring up blankly at the ceiling, as if in hope that it would help cool him down.
The touch of glass against his cheek stirred him from his lethargy, if only for a moment.
#27 Fall
“I wouldn’t be able to catch you.” It’s impossible. I’m only human, in the end.
“I wouldn’t expect you to.” You’ve done enough. More than enough for me.
They didn’t need to say anything more.
#28 Forgotten
Jin hated how poor his memory seemed to be when it came to birth dates. Those days seemed to creep unexpectedly upon him, and though he couldn’t really give them anything anyway-
But maybe that wasn’t what they expected. Maybe they simply wanted friends and family to be there, as they continued to grow older.
#29 Dance
They were a clumsy pair. Never knowing which direction the other was headed, they trod on feet with muttered curses and apologies. Any bystander would have been embarrassed to witness such a sight.
They were laughing, though - unrestrained, unrefined - and it was clear nothing else mattered.
#30 Body
Michiru was surprisingly strong, though Jin would never tell him that.
#31 Sacred
Perhaps they had been doomed from the start; their very existence should have never been.
If that were the case, then that was fine. They would live, make mistakes, hate for ridiculous, childish reasons, and fall in love with whomever they wished. Nothing could stop them.
#32 Farewells
He had never been particularly good with these kinds of meetings. Karin had wished him luck - given him a charm that looked ready to fall apart - while Kazune muttered something before retreating, away from the crowd.
As the fans were ushered away, it was only them. And somehow, it was awkward (unlike the dramatic flourishes he had made just seconds before).
Michiru seemed not to notice the uncertainty, and smiled like he always did; “Do your best, Jin.”
#33 World
“If you could have anything you wanted - anything at all - what would you ask for?”
Without looking, he could see the smile on the other’s face; “Nothing.”
Nothing at all.
#34 Formal
“And no random hugging Karin or Kujyou as soon as you see them. It’d just be considered rude-”
“But that’s just the way I am.” With the barest hint of a frown, Michiru leaned back against the seat, “We’re graduating, Jin-kun. It’s supposed to be a joyous occasion.”
Jin watched him from a moment, and then shrugged; “Whatever, Nishikiori. I’m not your chaperone.”
#35 Fever
Nonsensical words strung into sentences; that was what they were. But he would get better soon, remembering nothing of those hours of broken, rambled conversation-
“-and maybe you’re important to me.”
#36 Laugh
It was impossible to understand Nishikiori Michiru. The way he seemed to view the world - both bleak and full of promise - left others wondering, wondering all the time.
And how could be always been so cheerful, even as death stared at him in the face?
No, no one could answer that question.
#37 Lies
Karin and Kujyou were too damn close, even if they were dating. Too lovey-dovey when nothing else was required of them; too happy, hopeful, in love.
But he had stopped caring so deeply about what they did a long time ago. He just hadn’t admitted that, not even to himself.
#38 Forever
They would never be able to count all the stars in the sky, but it did not stop them from trying.
#39 Overwhelmed
And then, when the nightmares became too much, Michiru was always there to listen. Phone pressed hard against his ear, Jin tried to banish the images as he focused on that voice alone.
#40 Whisper
“Then it’ll be our secret.”
#41 Wait
Students surged past, barely giving him a passing glance. He looked down at his watch; just five more minutes (though he would repeat that over and over again).
#42 Talk
They knew little about one another, when he thought about it; he would have to fix that.
#43 Search
What had he been looking for, this entire time?
After years of wondering, Michiru believed he was close to the answer.
#44 Hope
Before all of that - before them - he had only thought of success; of finally gaining his father’s acknowledgement.
Then he realised there was a lot more for him to live for. Not for someone else, but for himself (though perhaps, right now, that was not entirely true).
#45 Eclipse
They missed the moment, when they crossed paths, but that was fine. There would always be another chance.
#46 Gravity
Sometimes the praise, the lights and screaming, could sway his better judgement. Sometimes it was too easy to be drowned in the life of an idol.
Then, as it faded, nothing else remained; nothing but the pouring rain, a kind-of-sort-of smile, and a shared umbrella.
#47 Highway
It was impossible to see the end - shimmering horizon and orange-red sky - while his mind tried to memorise each line, each spot of light. He spoke, then, the words curling out and upwards without pause;
“It’s beautiful, don’t you think?”
#48 Unknown
It had never occurred to him; never in a thousand lifetimes, because Karin was the only one and
Maybe it wasn’t something to be feared.
#49 Lock
“Damn it, Kujyou, open the door.”
Beside him, Michiru hummed, as if unconcerned about their current predicament. And, somehow, it did nothing to calm Jin’s nerves.
#50 Breathe
They watched the sunset, not really paying attention to it.
“Think it’ll ever change?”
“Who; us or them?”
“Both.”
And perhaps he had looked a little too serious, because Michiru laughed - good-natured, filling the sky itself with untainted joy - before slinging an arm across his shoulders;
“Does any of that really matter?”
No, I guess not.
* 14; referring to Jin’s character song. and now I’m laughing, because I haven’t heard it in ages
* 18; to dream in green means adaptability, need for healing, harmony, balance, reconciliation (within self or self with others). from Aisling: The Meaning of Colours in Dreams
* 49; three thousand years ago, I wrote about these two getting locked in a closet. Yeah, it happened again.
Title: delusion sketch
Rating: PG
Characters / Pairings: Jin/Michiru
Summary: The start, end, and in-between (but not quite, because there was so much left unsaid).
Dis/claimer: This is fanfiction. Nothing more, nothing less.
A/N: Used prompts from 1sentence (theme set Gamma) as writing practice. And these aren’t even one sentence, because apparently I wasn’t up for that kind of challenge. So in a way, this is me just messing around. Because I can. Yes.
Warning for probable spoilers, and everything else not making sense to some degree.
delusion sketch
#01 Ring
That was how they met, Jin realised. Something so small and insignificant - but it wasn’t, not really - had been the catalyst.
#02 Hero
Michiru saw through him easily, smiling that way until Jin huffed and turned away in a sulk.
So maybe he wouldn’t be the one everyone praised (remembered) in the end, but at least they could fight side by side.
#03 Memory
Eventually, always, it would blur and smear
something ugly and beautiful
and maybe he was scared.
#04 Box
“Dare I ask why?”
Michiru laughed as he closed the photo album; “You probably don’t want to know the answer.”
#05 Run
Maybe
maybe
may
m
He already knew it was impossible to get away. To close his eyes, cover his ears, and pretend none of it had happened.
#06 Hurricane
It was too much at times; chaotic, cluttered, stifling. So he reached out blindly, though he knew it was a useless gesture.
What he hadn’t expected was for someone to grab his hand and pull him out.
#07 Wings
If only it were so easy; if only if only
He would fly away from it all. His family, his problems, everything
And Jin laughed at himself, because it was childish and what had he been thinking. But Michiru did not laugh, and simply gave him a pat on the back; knowing, hearing nothing but hollow sound.
And maybe that was fine as well.
#08 Cold
“Remember, Nishikiori, it’s only because it’s so damn cold, got it? Alright, yeah, okay-”
“I heard you the first time, Jin-kun,” Michiru cut in with a yawn, “Go to sleep, love.”
#09 Red
It dripped, spreading across his fingertips until it seemed to consume him. Each time it happened, he felt as if he were drowning deeper, deeper somehow.
But they were nothing more than nightmares, Michiru had assured him.
He couldn’t say it (whose blood it was), and so continued to drown in his sleep.
#10 Drink
He stared at the cup in his hands; “I wonder why it hurts so much.”
There was no reply, though it was not entirely unexpected. Everyone else had already fallen asleep, and he seemed to be the only one left.
At least, until Jin stirred from his awkward position on the couch; stared at him for a moment, before groaning and twisting around:
“Doesn’ look right.”
Michiru stared at the idol’s back, head tilted, somehow curious. And while he did not expect any kind of elaboration, it seemed he would get one.
“Nishi’iori should smile more.”
#11 Midnight
tick-tock-tick
Seconds slipped by, faded and gone, yet neither moved.
#12 Temptation
Michiru had no idea why he’d leaned across the table at that moment; why he had pinched Jin’s cheeks, unable to stop the smile from spreading across his face.
“Now, now, is that the kind of expression an idol makes?”
#13 View
It’s too perfect, Michiru had said once, and Jin remembered asking why. But he could no longer recall the answer, as it blurred
muted colours, broken and torn down and built up again. That’s how we live.
#14 Music
“And why, may I ask, is it so funny?” Jin demanded. He watched as Michiru fought to control his laughter, wiping the tears from his eyes.
“Oh, it’s nothing, nothing really.”
Silence.
As Jin scowled, Michiru smiled in apology (or perhaps he was still amused), “Well, I can’t help but think you singing in English is ador-”
“Don’t finish that sentence.”
#15 Silk
Maybe Jin shouldn’t have been laughing so hard at Michiru’s battle costume, as he had seen it many times before. But they had almost died, and something had welled up inside and simply burst.
And Michiru was laughing beside him (perhaps for different reasons), so he guessed that it was fine.
#16 Cover
The battles they’d fought had long since blurred into one, incoherent memory. With no clear start or end - how many times they had been so close to losing everything - it wished to be left alone; forgotten.
But the glimpses of days long gone reminded them, still, how they never would have survived it alone.
#17 Promise
Just once, Michiru wished for nothing more than the truth; something that would not end up torn and broken, blackened by words and actions that opposed one another.
Perhaps he would never see that day.
#18 Dream
Green bloomed all around him. It was somehow perfect, but not, and yet he could not hear his own heartbeat.
He might have been searching for something, yet sleep brought no answers. That in itself was impossible.
#19 Candle
Maybe they would accidentally set the house on fire, though there was very little to actually burn. Either way, Jin was relieved that Michiru had thought to bring a torch along.
#20 Talent
He was good at nothing, ever since he had been a child. Mediocre at best, Michiru was content with that.
Jin refused to believe it, though; there was so much Michiru had done - continued to do - and he didn’t even realise it.
#21 Silence
“… Hey.”
The words rose to the ceiling before breaking apart.
“Hm?”
A pause; three heartbeats (or maybe more; his face was burning).
“Do you hate me?”
But he would not hear, as he feared the answer.
#22 Journey
How much further did they have to go? It dragged on, further and further, until he felt as if they were puppets on strings. He wanted to break from it, to do something unexpected, but knew he couldn’t.
#23 Fire
It burned, even now. Weakened, very soon it would simply die, smoke rising before the winds swept it away.
Jin watched it, waiting, glad that Michiru had chosen to accompany him.
#24 Strength
He couldn’t fight it any longer, even when a familiar voice called to him; pleaded to him, echoing echoing echo
ing
#25 Mask
No one ever saw the slight shift in his eyes, heard his words falter before adjusting. No, instead they saw what they expected.
In the crowd, though, there was one. One who raised a hand in a gesture that seemed to say Good Luck to the person behind the ‘singing teen sensation’.
And his heart seemed to calm, even as the sound blared around them.
#26 Ice
The cry of cicadas drowned out all other thought. Jin lay on his back, staring up blankly at the ceiling, as if in hope that it would help cool him down.
The touch of glass against his cheek stirred him from his lethargy, if only for a moment.
#27 Fall
“I wouldn’t be able to catch you.” It’s impossible. I’m only human, in the end.
“I wouldn’t expect you to.” You’ve done enough. More than enough for me.
They didn’t need to say anything more.
#28 Forgotten
Jin hated how poor his memory seemed to be when it came to birth dates. Those days seemed to creep unexpectedly upon him, and though he couldn’t really give them anything anyway-
But maybe that wasn’t what they expected. Maybe they simply wanted friends and family to be there, as they continued to grow older.
#29 Dance
They were a clumsy pair. Never knowing which direction the other was headed, they trod on feet with muttered curses and apologies. Any bystander would have been embarrassed to witness such a sight.
They were laughing, though - unrestrained, unrefined - and it was clear nothing else mattered.
#30 Body
Michiru was surprisingly strong, though Jin would never tell him that.
#31 Sacred
Perhaps they had been doomed from the start; their very existence should have never been.
If that were the case, then that was fine. They would live, make mistakes, hate for ridiculous, childish reasons, and fall in love with whomever they wished. Nothing could stop them.
#32 Farewells
He had never been particularly good with these kinds of meetings. Karin had wished him luck - given him a charm that looked ready to fall apart - while Kazune muttered something before retreating, away from the crowd.
As the fans were ushered away, it was only them. And somehow, it was awkward (unlike the dramatic flourishes he had made just seconds before).
Michiru seemed not to notice the uncertainty, and smiled like he always did; “Do your best, Jin.”
#33 World
“If you could have anything you wanted - anything at all - what would you ask for?”
Without looking, he could see the smile on the other’s face; “Nothing.”
Nothing at all.
#34 Formal
“And no random hugging Karin or Kujyou as soon as you see them. It’d just be considered rude-”
“But that’s just the way I am.” With the barest hint of a frown, Michiru leaned back against the seat, “We’re graduating, Jin-kun. It’s supposed to be a joyous occasion.”
Jin watched him from a moment, and then shrugged; “Whatever, Nishikiori. I’m not your chaperone.”
#35 Fever
Nonsensical words strung into sentences; that was what they were. But he would get better soon, remembering nothing of those hours of broken, rambled conversation-
“-and maybe you’re important to me.”
#36 Laugh
It was impossible to understand Nishikiori Michiru. The way he seemed to view the world - both bleak and full of promise - left others wondering, wondering all the time.
And how could be always been so cheerful, even as death stared at him in the face?
No, no one could answer that question.
#37 Lies
Karin and Kujyou were too damn close, even if they were dating. Too lovey-dovey when nothing else was required of them; too happy, hopeful, in love.
But he had stopped caring so deeply about what they did a long time ago. He just hadn’t admitted that, not even to himself.
#38 Forever
They would never be able to count all the stars in the sky, but it did not stop them from trying.
#39 Overwhelmed
And then, when the nightmares became too much, Michiru was always there to listen. Phone pressed hard against his ear, Jin tried to banish the images as he focused on that voice alone.
#40 Whisper
“Then it’ll be our secret.”
#41 Wait
Students surged past, barely giving him a passing glance. He looked down at his watch; just five more minutes (though he would repeat that over and over again).
#42 Talk
They knew little about one another, when he thought about it; he would have to fix that.
#43 Search
What had he been looking for, this entire time?
After years of wondering, Michiru believed he was close to the answer.
#44 Hope
Before all of that - before them - he had only thought of success; of finally gaining his father’s acknowledgement.
Then he realised there was a lot more for him to live for. Not for someone else, but for himself (though perhaps, right now, that was not entirely true).
#45 Eclipse
They missed the moment, when they crossed paths, but that was fine. There would always be another chance.
#46 Gravity
Sometimes the praise, the lights and screaming, could sway his better judgement. Sometimes it was too easy to be drowned in the life of an idol.
Then, as it faded, nothing else remained; nothing but the pouring rain, a kind-of-sort-of smile, and a shared umbrella.
#47 Highway
It was impossible to see the end - shimmering horizon and orange-red sky - while his mind tried to memorise each line, each spot of light. He spoke, then, the words curling out and upwards without pause;
“It’s beautiful, don’t you think?”
#48 Unknown
It had never occurred to him; never in a thousand lifetimes, because Karin was the only one and
Maybe it wasn’t something to be feared.
#49 Lock
“Damn it, Kujyou, open the door.”
Beside him, Michiru hummed, as if unconcerned about their current predicament. And, somehow, it did nothing to calm Jin’s nerves.
#50 Breathe
They watched the sunset, not really paying attention to it.
“Think it’ll ever change?”
“Who; us or them?”
“Both.”
And perhaps he had looked a little too serious, because Michiru laughed - good-natured, filling the sky itself with untainted joy - before slinging an arm across his shoulders;
“Does any of that really matter?”
No, I guess not.
* 14; referring to Jin’s character song. and now I’m laughing, because I haven’t heard it in ages
* 18; to dream in green means adaptability, need for healing, harmony, balance, reconciliation (within self or self with others). from Aisling: The Meaning of Colours in Dreams
* 49; three thousand years ago, I wrote about these two getting locked in a closet. Yeah, it happened again.