(no subject)
i was just talking to anna the whole way home. GOSH! i miss that girl sooooo much! im soooo glad things are back to ummm... when was that? highschool? hahaha! but seriously, im SO glad we're the way we are again, banany! LOVE YOU SOOO MUCH, YOUUU!
we started talking about the future. about how great it would be to get married, settle down and have kids. all that jazz, really.
but i don't know, now it got me thinking. i'm starting to plan my life now. and not just plan my life the way i am in college and what i want to do with work after, i mean plan my life in such a way that i'm really living it out purposely. as vague as that sounds, it's kinda personal, but ya. and the thing is, i know things will change. after all, when does it not, right? i could think i'm supposed to be doing this now when in the future, your whole world turns around and in the end, you're not meant for that.
how can anyone tell what they're here for?
how can everyone want to be great, want to be rich and famous when there are no standards for that anyway.
i wrote something once and it only struck me now how much i think about non-consequential things like this. i guess i just love to daydream. for the heck of it (and becuase i just cant seem to get it out of my head) i'll jot it down.
maybe after, i'll feel there's a sense in having written it down in the first place.
Of Sorts I wonder what it feels like to end it.
I'm not suicidal, don't worry.
but time is fleeting, i'm so young still.
At least i know they say time is fleeting.
there's comfort in knowing you're meant for greater things.
even if it's not meant to be in this lifetime.
maybe some people's purpose in life is not to be great
but to be stepping stones for the next person's greatness.
maybe some people aren't meant to be answers
but are me to be questions leading to those answers.
how would it feel to know you're just the question?
i want to be great.
i want to find answers.
i want to discover that treasure.
and not be the stepping stone leading to it.
maybe that's why i'm tired of life sometimes
not because i'm selfish and want to experience everything
but maybe becuase i'm proud and want to know everything.
but time is fleeting. i'm so young still.
at least i know time is fleeting.
you make me happy,
you know that, right?
i'm not proud i promise.
i love you love and love is nothing short of selfishness.
i promise, i love. i love to love.
i'm understanding how to keep asking questions
and not finding answers.
did i ever tell you i love skies?
it's cos it's infinite.
you can swim peacefully in the infinite and always feel great.
come. let's fly in the sky. okay, at least lie under it and stare.
see, im smiling? it means i'm happy that you're here.
allow me my moments of restlessness please.
there's beauty in confusion.
it's harder to be the question.
questions lead to so many other questions.
answers just concentrate on one question.
a "why?" always leads to "how come?"
to "What happened?"
to "where, when, whom?"
an answer always just leads to a "because."
okay, so maybe there are no such things as stepping stones,
jsut instruments of greatness.
there's too much to think about, too little time.
why?
time is fleeting, so what?
why?
okay. maybe i should just look at the sky.
no one can find answers in why.
i promise i'm not psycho. i just reflect too much, i guess.
i'm happy! i'm loved and happy and peaceful and calm =)
i think i've been watching Moulin Rouge too much...
ack, better get back to work.
questions, questions, questions
we started talking about the future. about how great it would be to get married, settle down and have kids. all that jazz, really.
but i don't know, now it got me thinking. i'm starting to plan my life now. and not just plan my life the way i am in college and what i want to do with work after, i mean plan my life in such a way that i'm really living it out purposely. as vague as that sounds, it's kinda personal, but ya. and the thing is, i know things will change. after all, when does it not, right? i could think i'm supposed to be doing this now when in the future, your whole world turns around and in the end, you're not meant for that.
how can anyone tell what they're here for?
how can everyone want to be great, want to be rich and famous when there are no standards for that anyway.
i wrote something once and it only struck me now how much i think about non-consequential things like this. i guess i just love to daydream. for the heck of it (and becuase i just cant seem to get it out of my head) i'll jot it down.
maybe after, i'll feel there's a sense in having written it down in the first place.
Of Sorts I wonder what it feels like to end it.
I'm not suicidal, don't worry.
but time is fleeting, i'm so young still.
At least i know they say time is fleeting.
there's comfort in knowing you're meant for greater things.
even if it's not meant to be in this lifetime.
maybe some people's purpose in life is not to be great
but to be stepping stones for the next person's greatness.
maybe some people aren't meant to be answers
but are me to be questions leading to those answers.
how would it feel to know you're just the question?
i want to be great.
i want to find answers.
i want to discover that treasure.
and not be the stepping stone leading to it.
maybe that's why i'm tired of life sometimes
not because i'm selfish and want to experience everything
but maybe becuase i'm proud and want to know everything.
but time is fleeting. i'm so young still.
at least i know time is fleeting.
you make me happy,
you know that, right?
i'm not proud i promise.
i love you love and love is nothing short of selfishness.
i promise, i love. i love to love.
i'm understanding how to keep asking questions
and not finding answers.
did i ever tell you i love skies?
it's cos it's infinite.
you can swim peacefully in the infinite and always feel great.
come. let's fly in the sky. okay, at least lie under it and stare.
see, im smiling? it means i'm happy that you're here.
allow me my moments of restlessness please.
there's beauty in confusion.
it's harder to be the question.
questions lead to so many other questions.
answers just concentrate on one question.
a "why?" always leads to "how come?"
to "What happened?"
to "where, when, whom?"
an answer always just leads to a "because."
okay, so maybe there are no such things as stepping stones,
jsut instruments of greatness.
there's too much to think about, too little time.
why?
time is fleeting, so what?
why?
okay. maybe i should just look at the sky.
no one can find answers in why.
i promise i'm not psycho. i just reflect too much, i guess.
i'm happy! i'm loved and happy and peaceful and calm =)
i think i've been watching Moulin Rouge too much...
ack, better get back to work.
questions, questions, questions