SOOOO blah.
i woke up today feeling blah. this mtv internship isn't doing much for me. apart from the few events im heading, everyday is such a burden. summer doesnt feel like summer with this internship. it's such a burden. PLUS the fact that it's unnecessary and im not getting paid, a 9am-7pm job is just. UGH. i want out now. im gonna intern next summer anyway. but i can't blame them. i mean, i relaly am jsut an intern staying here for a while. i can't complain. i LOVE mtv but not this job right now.. oh well, caramel. there will be better days =)
i honestly dont know why i decided to get into this so soon. i wanna hang out with friends (which i cant cos when i get home, im SO exhausted from the day, i just wannt plop into bed and relax), i wanna exercise (Cos ive been gaining weight just sitting down at the office, WAITING for something to do), i wanna go out with YOU (which i cant cos you have the play and cant come over), i wanna visit erika (which i cant also cos of previous reasons), i wanna dive (which i can only do at night. boo. im tired by then), i wanna be with the youth and help out with the play SO badly (but i cant. UGH!!!!) and i just wanna bum around this summer before school picks up again. i wish people in this place were huggable. i used to get 8 hugs a day. i hardly get any now apart from my sister who, by the way, i shove into my arms so i dont know if that counts.
im dying to do something productive.
gawd, i wish i didnt have to feel so low next to my siblings all the time. THAT bites.
but on a more positive note, diving this weekend with family for the first time. im excited for that! i just hope this sickness im starting to feel doesnt hit me by that time. i dont mind diving and THEN getting sick. call me crazy but i actually DO wanna get sick jsut so i can get some rest. maybe that will feel like summer ;)
NOTE: who knows if im just feeling this now.. i wouldnt know. maybe its just cos i feel myself with a fever. im tired. tomorrow's another day and i cant wait for it! too bad its only 10 am.
i honestly dont know why i decided to get into this so soon. i wanna hang out with friends (which i cant cos when i get home, im SO exhausted from the day, i just wannt plop into bed and relax), i wanna exercise (Cos ive been gaining weight just sitting down at the office, WAITING for something to do), i wanna go out with YOU (which i cant cos you have the play and cant come over), i wanna visit erika (which i cant also cos of previous reasons), i wanna dive (which i can only do at night. boo. im tired by then), i wanna be with the youth and help out with the play SO badly (but i cant. UGH!!!!) and i just wanna bum around this summer before school picks up again. i wish people in this place were huggable. i used to get 8 hugs a day. i hardly get any now apart from my sister who, by the way, i shove into my arms so i dont know if that counts.
im dying to do something productive.
gawd, i wish i didnt have to feel so low next to my siblings all the time. THAT bites.
but on a more positive note, diving this weekend with family for the first time. im excited for that! i just hope this sickness im starting to feel doesnt hit me by that time. i dont mind diving and THEN getting sick. call me crazy but i actually DO wanna get sick jsut so i can get some rest. maybe that will feel like summer ;)
NOTE: who knows if im just feeling this now.. i wouldnt know. maybe its just cos i feel myself with a fever. im tired. tomorrow's another day and i cant wait for it! too bad its only 10 am.