I told her not too...

[delicate_escape]

But she is...

Marlee is fading on me..

She moved in with her dad..

In Lewiston..

And..Ill probably not see her again..

She faded on me. And I told her..I told her not too! And she did..

And shes going to find a new best friend...

And Im going to be left here in the cold..

All our plans--gone.

I dont know how to feel, I really dont..

Im just..scared. Scared that--I lost my best friend. I lost my sistress.

And it hurts..So much. I didnt think that would ever happen. Not ever.

And Im sitting here--trying to make since of everythings thats happened. And I cant.

I dont know what happened..but I want her to come back. And I want her to live in Rockford, and I want to be driving over to her house, to talk about everything we use too. Our problems, our lives, our worries, our plans. Things sisters talked about.

And Im sitting here--Thinking more and more..and getting more upset.

Mad?
Upset?
Depressed?
Happy for her?

And I want to know if she feels the same way. Or if I was just--another person to let go of.

I miss her.

And I want her to be staying in the spare bedroom, and I want to run up here and jump on the bed and wake her up, and watch a movie, or go shopping, and thats not going to happen.

I cant run up there, and I cant wake her up, and we cant go shopping. Shes not there. The room is so cold and so empty. I lost my best friend, and Im starting to think that I cant handle that. I thought I could..But I cant.

And..
And..
I sound so stupid..But, I dunno, maybe I am. But I miss her.

A lot.