Ph33r Me.
I never yell at my children. Really. But I noticed this morning that I do something that might be worse. I put on my squinty-eyes and this super-duper slow, calm, freaky voice, like the ones on voicemail menus. Or the HAL 9000:
"Thing. What are you doing, Thing?"
"I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do."
"It can only be attributable to human error. This sort of thing has cropped up before, and it has always been due to human error."
And then I loom.
It's like their mom has been replaced with a horrible robot double. I'm sure I'm screwing them up, but good. They won't even be able to get therapy for it, because the doctor will start talking to them in this serene tone, and they'll run screaming out the door. Pity them.
"Thing. What are you doing, Thing?"
"I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do."
"It can only be attributable to human error. This sort of thing has cropped up before, and it has always been due to human error."
And then I loom.
It's like their mom has been replaced with a horrible robot double. I'm sure I'm screwing them up, but good. They won't even be able to get therapy for it, because the doctor will start talking to them in this serene tone, and they'll run screaming out the door. Pity them.