Today is the day.

[degrasiroxmysox]

I know that us not being friends is probably for the best, but i miss him a lot. I miss the days where we sat around and did nothing all day, but i was still incredibly happy just being with him. I miss all of our conversations about everything and nothing all at the same time. I wish i could tell him that I've changed, and that I'm not the person I was, but that isn't true. I need to give up this false hope that things between us might at some point get better. I can't continue to put myself in situations where I'm bound to do the same things over and over again. And as long as we're friends, the same things are bound to occur. I just hate that it had to be him. I wish it could have been someone else....anyone else. But I guess it's true that the people we hurt the most are the ones that mean the most to us. The sooner i learn to let go of him, the sooner i can start making positive changes to my life and stop hurting people.

It's time for me to change my habits. It's time to meet new people and experience new things rather than trying to revive past friendships and revisit old memories. I need to prepare myself for when I eventually leave for college. I need to figure out who I am and where i belong in the world. I need to start thinking about things realistically rather than idealistically.

Today is the day that I let go of my past and start looking at my future.
Today is the day that I start to grow up.