pain inspires this type of writing

[defyordinary]

When the birds are out,
they're singing.
When the sun is shining,
I'm warm.
When the clouds roll in,
it's gray but not dark.
When the rain falls,
it pours.
When the storm follows,
Life ends.

When you left, you took my trust.
Now I have nothing.
Cynical and hurt,
I have no faith.
And then when I need faith,
how can I believe?
I cannot fight the doubts.
I am not equipped.
I need to be given what most others have.
It's not right, nor fair.
You must decide how set you are
on giving me this.
Because it's the only way
to get back what I've lost.
But you don't have to.
you don't have to be the one
who gives me this back.
You can walk away.
If I'm too much
and I will understand.
And I'll survive.
Because when you've got nothing,
you've got nothing to lose.

I felt it.
A feeling of
belief, of hope.
You brought it out
in me. And you gave me
a reason to believe, and
you were that reason. It's
easier to trust when you've not
been proven wrong. Then it happens
and the trust is broken the smallest
bit. And I'm back to this sad place
where I don't believe and I don't
know how. My mind races and I
feel lost. How did I get to
that place before? And
it's gone. I'm alone
again. Wondering
if I'll ever
feel that
feeling
again.