junetime
i have nothing to hide and i love you more than anything... he always knows exactly what to say.
I've had one hell of a week. Some pretty f-ed up stuff has happened in my life recently... I'm trying to deal with it but its hard to be hated by someone you didnt even know had a problem with you in the first place. totally blindsided by that one. im feeling pretty betrayed, but atleast a lot of things are now making sense that i was blaming myslef for all this year, and now i know its not me and not my problem. although it still kinda sucks. well really sucks. doesnt help that i stopped taking my meds this weekend...and im pmsing. geeze. i was not in the best mental state to hear this, but i guess bad news doesnt wait for the most convienient of oppurtunities to present itself.
oh and by the way just to prevent this in the future... if anyone has issues with me, if i said or did something that offended you could you please let me know that you are still carrying around that anger... i may not have realized it and i want to set it right. I am completely sincere in wanting to keep my friendships healthy and happy. Maybe just talk to me or send me an email or something (not necessarily on here).
anyways tonight was really nice. I got dinner from wegmans for me and john and we ate out on his porch. He is adorable, and always there for me no matter what. I know i can always count on him to make me laugh and figure out whats really going on with me. sometimes i dont even know whats really bothering me. after we ate, we went to get his hair cut, and then back to my house and hung out with my mom outside for a bit... then we went back to his house to watch the dallas/miami game. it was pretty fun watching john spaz out over the game :) He almost knocked me out a few times when he flung his arms in the air when Miami scored...
so now im sitting in my house late at night (you should probably be proud of me because im up so late...) and im going to go upstairs and read, then goto bed. hopefully i will be able to catch up with jamie and em tomorrow at some point. I miss our time together.
good night my loves.
I've had one hell of a week. Some pretty f-ed up stuff has happened in my life recently... I'm trying to deal with it but its hard to be hated by someone you didnt even know had a problem with you in the first place. totally blindsided by that one. im feeling pretty betrayed, but atleast a lot of things are now making sense that i was blaming myslef for all this year, and now i know its not me and not my problem. although it still kinda sucks. well really sucks. doesnt help that i stopped taking my meds this weekend...and im pmsing. geeze. i was not in the best mental state to hear this, but i guess bad news doesnt wait for the most convienient of oppurtunities to present itself.
oh and by the way just to prevent this in the future... if anyone has issues with me, if i said or did something that offended you could you please let me know that you are still carrying around that anger... i may not have realized it and i want to set it right. I am completely sincere in wanting to keep my friendships healthy and happy. Maybe just talk to me or send me an email or something (not necessarily on here).
anyways tonight was really nice. I got dinner from wegmans for me and john and we ate out on his porch. He is adorable, and always there for me no matter what. I know i can always count on him to make me laugh and figure out whats really going on with me. sometimes i dont even know whats really bothering me. after we ate, we went to get his hair cut, and then back to my house and hung out with my mom outside for a bit... then we went back to his house to watch the dallas/miami game. it was pretty fun watching john spaz out over the game :) He almost knocked me out a few times when he flung his arms in the air when Miami scored...
so now im sitting in my house late at night (you should probably be proud of me because im up so late...) and im going to go upstairs and read, then goto bed. hopefully i will be able to catch up with jamie and em tomorrow at some point. I miss our time together.
good night my loves.