Title: Cold Feet
Author:
mariana_oconnorRating: G
Pairings: Remus/Sirius, Remus/Tonks
Spoilers: Beginning of Deathly Hallows
Era: Post HBP - pre-DH
Disclaimer: They aren't mine - if they had been this scene would not need to exist. But if JK isn't using them any more - perhaps she won't notice if I borrow them for a while.
Summary: Remus isn't sure he should be doing this.
Author's Note: One of three or so fics that automatically popped into my head while reading Deathly Hallows. The others are in progress, but I needed to get this one up, despite not having written a lot of R/S stuff in a while.
Her parents weren’t particularly thrilled with the match and he could understand why. Marrying a werewolf was a little different from marrying a muggle, a lot different in fact, no matter what she might have yelled at them. They went along with it though because they didn’t want history to repeat itself, which it seemed to be doing quite a bit of at the moment.
What had possessed him to propose? What on earth had come over him? This wasn’t right - she should be with someone younger, more carefree, more stable… less in love with her dead cousin.
For a fleeting second he entertained the notion of going out there and telling her it was off, but he couldn’t do that. It was her wedding day, small and subdued as it was - the pall of death and violence hanging over them. Getting jilted at the altar was not something she should have to go through… plus he’d have Andromeda and Ted Tonks hunting him down as well as the Death Eaters; no one could survive that.
He adjusted the rose pinned to his chest and sighed, noting the lines around his eyes and mouth that seemed deeper than ever.
As he stared at it the colour appeared to drain out of the flower he was holding, leaving it a pure brilliant white and he looked up to find his own careworn face replaced by a grinning James.
He could remember that moment so clearly: the four of them standing in front of the mirror (a good deal less cracked and worn than the one he was now looking at) admiring their finery.
“Now, you’re not going to run off, are you? ‘Cause you know we’d have to hunt you down and drag you back if you did.” Sirius’ words echoed in his memory.
“Not a chance, Padfoot.” James replied, his grin growing even bigger, if that was possible, as he fiddled with his cuff. It had been obvious at that moment, looking at him as he smiled wider than he ever had before, that James had been telling the truth. He had never doubted what he was about to do. “Can’t leave a beautiful lady alone at the altar.”
He envied James that certainty now, his total confidence that this was the right move to make. He had loved Lily so much.
“Am I doing the right thing?” he asked the reflections quietly, watching Sirius’ grey eyes carefully as he grinned, looking right at him but seeing only James. None of them answered his question and their voices and images faded. They were gone and he stood alone, staring at the reflection of a man whose best years had long passed by.
“Mr Lupin? We’re ready for you out here.” The voice of the administrative assistant called through the door.
He took a deep breath.
“Too late for second guesses…” his own youthful voice goaded him as it had done his friend almost two decades before.
“Too late now...” He agreed, remembering Sirius, young and relaxed as James’ best man. He turned towards the door and squared his shoulders, wondering where all that time had gone.
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