Does housing HONESTLY cost this much? I mean, REALLY?!
I find it really hard to believe that a 300 square foot (or less in some cases) studio apartment can go for 700 dollars a month with nothing but rent included. Yeah, they're cute as hell cause they were built in the 1920's and I want one really bad, but 700 a month plus whatever I'd have to pay in bills. It's annoying. SO ANNOYING. Maybe I'm being a little crazy and overly specific and picky, but I want to live in a nice part of Portland with a lot of young people, with a lot going on and in a cute apartment. Is that too much to ask for? I think it might be. I really just don't want to have to drive my car at all. I want to be able to not deal with my car at all during the week. I want to be able to walk to work, coffee, entertainment, etc..Unfortunately, I think wanting that is going to cost me a lot of money. Maybe too much money. ARGH.
And plane tickets are a bitch in the holidays. Holy crap. Here I am thinking that plane tickets are going down (cause they were!) and December would be a good time to fly without even thinking about the holidays. Maybe because I don't want to think about the holidays, but plane tickets skyrocketed as of about a week ago to crazyness and now it's like, a cheap plane ticket won't be likely until the beginning of January.
The insane part of me says to pack all my shit and just drive and stay in a hostel or extended stay until I find a place to live. The rational side of me then says that's a little on the TOO crazy side, considering moving 2750 miles away shouldn't be an unplanned event, and I need to make sure I have a place to live before I drive out there even if it's going to cost me a little more to fly out there and then come back and drive.
And Thanksgiving is a week from tomorrow. UGH. I never wanted to be that person who hates the holidays, but I do. My dad's family always comes for Thanksgiving and most of them are loud, rude, and don't help at all or seem at all appreciative of what we do (WE being my mom and I). So yeah...my mom and I spend the entire day sweating our asses off in the kitchen making dishes that aren't even that good (but it's family tradition and God forbid we mess with that!!) while they all just lay around the house and the kids run around screaming and being horrible little brats and then everyone asks me 4000 freaking times WHAT I'M DOING. I don't know. As soon as I know, I'll let you know. STOP ASKING.
I've been rearranging as much furniture in the house as possible. For some reason, when I feel extremely anxious or crazy, rearranging furniture makes me feel a lot better. Weird, I know, cause most people find moving furniture horribly frustrating.
I saw a shooting star about a week ago and wished to find a reasonably priced apartment that fits my criteria. I haven't found one. I don't believe in shooting stars anymore. Not that I ever really did, but now I really don't. haha.
I am definately having a quarterlife crisis.
Characteristics of quarter-life crisis may include:
feeling "not good enough" because one can't find a job that is at one's academic/intellectual level (YEP!)
frustration with relationships, the working world, and finding a suitable job or career (YEP!)
confusion of identity (eh, not so much)
insecurity regarding the near future (GOD YES.)
insecurity concerning long-term plans, life goals (YES AGAIN)
insecurity regarding present accomplishments (I SUCK AT LIFE RIGHT NOW)
re-evaluation of close interpersonal relationships (Yeah...definately.)
disappointment with one's job (haha. Uh yeah.)
nostalgia for university, college, high school or elementary school life (not so much)
tendency to hold stronger opinions (yeah, I have been quite opinionated here lately)
boredom with social interactions (yeah. But I think that mostly has to do with the fact that there is NOTHING TO DO)
loss of closeness to high school and college friends (yeah. This is depressing)
financially-rooted stress (overwhelming college loans, unanticipatedly high cost of living, etc.) (WHY ARE APARTMENTS SO EXPENSIVE?!)
loneliness (It's good that I have cats)
desire to have children (well no, not at all. A kid would just make my life worse. haha)
a sense that everyone is, somehow, doing better than you (GOD YES.)
That is all.
And plane tickets are a bitch in the holidays. Holy crap. Here I am thinking that plane tickets are going down (cause they were!) and December would be a good time to fly without even thinking about the holidays. Maybe because I don't want to think about the holidays, but plane tickets skyrocketed as of about a week ago to crazyness and now it's like, a cheap plane ticket won't be likely until the beginning of January.
The insane part of me says to pack all my shit and just drive and stay in a hostel or extended stay until I find a place to live. The rational side of me then says that's a little on the TOO crazy side, considering moving 2750 miles away shouldn't be an unplanned event, and I need to make sure I have a place to live before I drive out there even if it's going to cost me a little more to fly out there and then come back and drive.
And Thanksgiving is a week from tomorrow. UGH. I never wanted to be that person who hates the holidays, but I do. My dad's family always comes for Thanksgiving and most of them are loud, rude, and don't help at all or seem at all appreciative of what we do (WE being my mom and I). So yeah...my mom and I spend the entire day sweating our asses off in the kitchen making dishes that aren't even that good (but it's family tradition and God forbid we mess with that!!) while they all just lay around the house and the kids run around screaming and being horrible little brats and then everyone asks me 4000 freaking times WHAT I'M DOING. I don't know. As soon as I know, I'll let you know. STOP ASKING.
I've been rearranging as much furniture in the house as possible. For some reason, when I feel extremely anxious or crazy, rearranging furniture makes me feel a lot better. Weird, I know, cause most people find moving furniture horribly frustrating.
I saw a shooting star about a week ago and wished to find a reasonably priced apartment that fits my criteria. I haven't found one. I don't believe in shooting stars anymore. Not that I ever really did, but now I really don't. haha.
I am definately having a quarterlife crisis.
Characteristics of quarter-life crisis may include:
feeling "not good enough" because one can't find a job that is at one's academic/intellectual level (YEP!)
frustration with relationships, the working world, and finding a suitable job or career (YEP!)
confusion of identity (eh, not so much)
insecurity regarding the near future (GOD YES.)
insecurity concerning long-term plans, life goals (YES AGAIN)
insecurity regarding present accomplishments (I SUCK AT LIFE RIGHT NOW)
re-evaluation of close interpersonal relationships (Yeah...definately.)
disappointment with one's job (haha. Uh yeah.)
nostalgia for university, college, high school or elementary school life (not so much)
tendency to hold stronger opinions (yeah, I have been quite opinionated here lately)
boredom with social interactions (yeah. But I think that mostly has to do with the fact that there is NOTHING TO DO)
loss of closeness to high school and college friends (yeah. This is depressing)
financially-rooted stress (overwhelming college loans, unanticipatedly high cost of living, etc.) (WHY ARE APARTMENTS SO EXPENSIVE?!)
loneliness (It's good that I have cats)
desire to have children (well no, not at all. A kid would just make my life worse. haha)
a sense that everyone is, somehow, doing better than you (GOD YES.)
That is all.