mornin'
"Some Hearts" by Carrie Underwood
i'm amazed at my own stupidity lately. How could i have thought that I could do this and NOT get attached? That's not the kind of person I am. He doesn't have feelings for me, he never will.
"The Adventure" by Angels & Airwaves
I need to get that in my head. And it needs to stop, because the longer it goes on, the more i'm just gonna get hurt in the end when he actually tells me he can't like me like that. Even though I already know it in my heart, it will still hurt like a bitch. Because that's just how things work for me the majority of the time, i fall, they don't, i get my heart stepped on again. I should really find a new process to fall into, cause this one, is getting a little old. I'm worried that if i stop though, he'll question what he says is a "perfect" friendship. Is there even such thing? As anything "perfect"? I don't think so. The only things that i have ever thought were perfect turns out, haven't been for quite awhile.
"Set Phasers to Stun" by TBS
I'm pretty thankful for work right now though, because that way I don't really have to think about or face the people who are involved in the endless stress and hell. My sister seems to be doing pretty good, she's gone to New York for the weekend for her birthday to visit an old room mate.
"Am I the Only One (Who's Ever Felt This Way)" by The Dixie Chicks
I am very worried about her though, she hasn't been herself since Grafton, not that I expected her to be, but it's still concerning. My dad might make his new tattoo he's getting look like Grafton, which would be amazing. More and more I can't wait to get my phoenix tattoo, just so whenever I'm having a shitty week, i can just catch a glimpse of it in the mirror and remember that i'll get through it.
"Anchors Aweigh" by The Bouncing Souls
Because that's what the phoenix is to me, a representation of even when we go through hell, we'll get through it and change and still come out strong and beautiful. And sometimes i need to be reminded of that.
i'm amazed at my own stupidity lately. How could i have thought that I could do this and NOT get attached? That's not the kind of person I am. He doesn't have feelings for me, he never will.
"The Adventure" by Angels & Airwaves
I need to get that in my head. And it needs to stop, because the longer it goes on, the more i'm just gonna get hurt in the end when he actually tells me he can't like me like that. Even though I already know it in my heart, it will still hurt like a bitch. Because that's just how things work for me the majority of the time, i fall, they don't, i get my heart stepped on again. I should really find a new process to fall into, cause this one, is getting a little old. I'm worried that if i stop though, he'll question what he says is a "perfect" friendship. Is there even such thing? As anything "perfect"? I don't think so. The only things that i have ever thought were perfect turns out, haven't been for quite awhile.
"Set Phasers to Stun" by TBS
I'm pretty thankful for work right now though, because that way I don't really have to think about or face the people who are involved in the endless stress and hell. My sister seems to be doing pretty good, she's gone to New York for the weekend for her birthday to visit an old room mate.
"Am I the Only One (Who's Ever Felt This Way)" by The Dixie Chicks
I am very worried about her though, she hasn't been herself since Grafton, not that I expected her to be, but it's still concerning. My dad might make his new tattoo he's getting look like Grafton, which would be amazing. More and more I can't wait to get my phoenix tattoo, just so whenever I'm having a shitty week, i can just catch a glimpse of it in the mirror and remember that i'll get through it.
"Anchors Aweigh" by The Bouncing Souls
Because that's what the phoenix is to me, a representation of even when we go through hell, we'll get through it and change and still come out strong and beautiful. And sometimes i need to be reminded of that.