(no subject)
of course the one side to being drunk is how very strong the urge to carve becomes
i know where that little knife is now
it's like a song waiting to be written in skin
ah, but i resist, i resist but gods it's beautiful -- what a mess i could make. fucking clotting factor wrestled down by alcohol's thinning properties, pain amplified to ecstasy.
just another version of the call of the void.
i wish you were here to hurt me.
fuck though. after all these years i finally understand. it heightens touch and hearing, or seems to do at least. they become keener the more my reason slips away. it makes me wonder, to some degree, if reason i s holding me back from feeling all i could.
probably so.
i want to slice myself to ribbons and taste myself on tattered lips.