More travelin' tales....
The morning before we left Vientiane we had to go to the U.S. Embassy to get more pages inserted into our passport....The stamp into Lao took the last pages in each of our passports....Crazy, huh? It was a simple process though, which is good 'cos I was worrying a bit about it. I thought it would be somewhat settling actually....Seeing some Americans...But ya know what? Didn't see a single one. Even the workers weren't...I thought you had to be American to work at an American Embassy?
Anyway....We hopped on a bus to Vang Vieng, they said it would only be 3-4 hours and for once they were right! And not a minute too fucking soon too because I don't know why but I always manage to choose the wrong side of the bus to sit on ( i.e. - I end up sitting in the direct sun for the entire journey). I was also excited because this town was just as I'd imagined. A dusty, sleepy little village on the river with huge limestone cliffs rising around it like a circular wall....Lush vegetation everywhere you looked and an empty blue sky with the most intense sun you've ever felt. As soon as I stepped off the bus and took a look around I thought, "This is the most beautiful place I have ever been."....
We found a crusty room for $4 a night and set our stuff down....The main attraction in Vang Vieng is tubing down the Nam Song River and consuming vast amounts of beer. I thought this sounded like home to me. I can't recall the countless hours I spent tubing down the Bogue Chitta in high school with Abita beer in hand....Good times...Okay, so first up we decided to check out the tours and get the scoop on all the various activities. We ended up signing up for this kayaking and caving tour the next day. We showed up at the booking place the next morning around 8 and grabbed some breakfast...We hopped onto a songthaew (basically a truck converted into a taxi - they cover the back with a high roof and put in benches alongside the length of each side of the truck bed) with about 6 other people, kayaks strapped onto the roof and set off 30km up the river to the first cave. We walked across this little bridge to a village, there was a monkey tied up to a tree and he was "playing" with a puppy. I thought it seemed more like ripping off the limbs, one by one, but the puppy kept coming back for more each time he'd wriggled away. There was a short hike through some rice fields to the opening of the cave. There was a lagoon there, filled with icy water, and a rope heading from a tree near the shore deep into the cave....There were also tons of inner tubes piled up nearby. He handed each of us a tube and a head light and said we use the rope to guide us along through the cave....K, right, I can do this. I'm not scared. So Gan and I hopped in, were the first ones following our guide...We have to be careful as we drag our cold asses into the cave so we don't knock our heads on the roof, it's that low. As soon as we are a little ways into the first chamber the guide says, "My friend saw an anaconda in here last week" as he's scanning the water with his light.....Shut the fuck up! You don't tell the tourists that!! I tried to stay calm and tell myself not to be such a wimp. I ate a spider for fuck's sake. It was a surprisingly short distance to where we hop outta the water and laid our tubes down, the rest of the way would be covered on foot. There were some spots that were so low you had to crawl practically on your stomach to get through....I was worried about Gan's back (it's been bothering him lately) and I kept thinking I saw something slithering towards me out of the corner of my eye. It wasn't long inside the cave, maybe 10-15 minutes....then we hopped back on the inner tubes and got the hell out. It was fun but I wasn't wanting to hang around in there too long. We headed back through the fields to the village where a dodgy lunch awaited us. I took a few bites and thought I should stop before spewing all over our hosts. Might not be considered too polite....
Now came the kayaking. I was excited but a little concerned as I've only done it once and that was a few years ago in Tennessee...Or maybe it was North Carolina. I don't remember. Somewhere around there. But that doesn't matter. My point is, I was concerned. We had the option of single person kayaks or doubling up. We decided to double up. Big mistake. We ended up fighting most of the time, Gan was in back and said I was fucking him up while he's trying to steer. He's barking out orders and it took everything in me not to whack him in the head with my paddle. We flipped on the rapids. 3 of them to be precise. Two were not such big deals, we easily got back in the kayak and there was no damage done...But one, however, was not so simple. It was at this awful bend in the river and the rocks were more numerous and larger and the thing is we'd gotten lodged against this rock and almost tipped but managed to balance ourselves out again....and then these freakin' Brits came along and ran into us and we flipped over instantly....The water was moving so fast and I remembered that the guide said if we were caught in the current to keep our feet up and go with the flow....Okay, but what about the huge ass rocks that are in front of me and I'm on my back and can't see shit?? I got slammed hard into this rock and was trying to grab onto it and turn myself around when I see a kayak heading straight for me (those damn Brits again!!) and they pin me up against the rock. The guide makes his way over and is pulling on my life vest to get me out and I manage to scrape the shit out of my knees climbing up on top of the rock. Oh yeah, no idea where my paddle is either. I crawl over to this sandbank and wait for Gannon, the guide and our kayak. I should also mention that all of our kayaks had holes in the back which the guide tried to plug up with leaves. Got that? Leaves. So he's emptying out our kayak and Gan and I are trying to laugh about the ridiculousness of it all....We hop back on board and continue on our way. We all find our way to this spot where there are multi-level, chill-out spots made of bamboo. There were straw mats and some cushions. Some area were covered, some were in the sun. They lined the right side of the bank which was very steep. Built up about 30 ft. in the air were two platform from which to leap off, holding onto a lever which would swing you out over the water and drop you in. Looked like fun but no fucking way, man. We stopped off there for about an hour and had some beers. We got back in the water and it was slow moving. Our kayak kept filling up with water and we were sinking. The rest of our group was way ahead of us at this point and we had to stop off to drain out the kayak a couple of times. We never did catch up with them again, they actually just left us behind! We came to the end of the line and deposited our kayak and life vests.
That night we hit this spot a couple doors down from our guesthouse and ran into those Irish guys that we'd met on the way into Laos. We hung out upstairs and had more drinks than we should have and this other guy that we'd met showed up and offered up the opium pipe. By midnight we were all a bit wasted but they knew of this other spot down by the river that we should check out. We wandered down to the edge of town and followed this tiny little bamboo bridge over the water. It deposited us in this totally ethereal world filled with bamboo groves which broke up into little sections. There was one spot with a bonfire and loads of people dancing. There was another spot with half a dozen hammocks strung up in the trees. There were bamboo platforms, raised a couple of feet off the ground with colorful pillows and mats. The guys brought back mushroom shakes. Hm. I should have learned my lesson in Thailand. But I drank it anyway. It didn't do shit though which I was actually kind of glad about. I was not in the mood to have an intense mind-altering experience. I curled up in a hammock and zoned. I found Gannon a little while later and said I was tired, we headed back to the room.
The next day we had the worst hangover ever and I was reminded of all the times my mother has berated me for putting so many toxins into my body, etc. Yes, mom, I'm hearin' ya loud and clear. It's stupid and irresponsible....but.....how come it's so much fun? It was a lazy day, we finally managed to get our asses out of the room for dinner and someone was looking out for us because we found a place that was playing "Family Guy"...We have been looking for it since we started this trip. Bless these enlightened people.
We are going tubing now in an hour, we ended up staying here 3 more nights than we'd intended. We're running short on time, we only have a 15 day visa...We catch a bus tomorrow morning to Luang Prabang which is supposed to be the Buddhist spiritual capital of Laos. Good stuff....
Anyway....We hopped on a bus to Vang Vieng, they said it would only be 3-4 hours and for once they were right! And not a minute too fucking soon too because I don't know why but I always manage to choose the wrong side of the bus to sit on ( i.e. - I end up sitting in the direct sun for the entire journey). I was also excited because this town was just as I'd imagined. A dusty, sleepy little village on the river with huge limestone cliffs rising around it like a circular wall....Lush vegetation everywhere you looked and an empty blue sky with the most intense sun you've ever felt. As soon as I stepped off the bus and took a look around I thought, "This is the most beautiful place I have ever been."....
We found a crusty room for $4 a night and set our stuff down....The main attraction in Vang Vieng is tubing down the Nam Song River and consuming vast amounts of beer. I thought this sounded like home to me. I can't recall the countless hours I spent tubing down the Bogue Chitta in high school with Abita beer in hand....Good times...Okay, so first up we decided to check out the tours and get the scoop on all the various activities. We ended up signing up for this kayaking and caving tour the next day. We showed up at the booking place the next morning around 8 and grabbed some breakfast...We hopped onto a songthaew (basically a truck converted into a taxi - they cover the back with a high roof and put in benches alongside the length of each side of the truck bed) with about 6 other people, kayaks strapped onto the roof and set off 30km up the river to the first cave. We walked across this little bridge to a village, there was a monkey tied up to a tree and he was "playing" with a puppy. I thought it seemed more like ripping off the limbs, one by one, but the puppy kept coming back for more each time he'd wriggled away. There was a short hike through some rice fields to the opening of the cave. There was a lagoon there, filled with icy water, and a rope heading from a tree near the shore deep into the cave....There were also tons of inner tubes piled up nearby. He handed each of us a tube and a head light and said we use the rope to guide us along through the cave....K, right, I can do this. I'm not scared. So Gan and I hopped in, were the first ones following our guide...We have to be careful as we drag our cold asses into the cave so we don't knock our heads on the roof, it's that low. As soon as we are a little ways into the first chamber the guide says, "My friend saw an anaconda in here last week" as he's scanning the water with his light.....Shut the fuck up! You don't tell the tourists that!! I tried to stay calm and tell myself not to be such a wimp. I ate a spider for fuck's sake. It was a surprisingly short distance to where we hop outta the water and laid our tubes down, the rest of the way would be covered on foot. There were some spots that were so low you had to crawl practically on your stomach to get through....I was worried about Gan's back (it's been bothering him lately) and I kept thinking I saw something slithering towards me out of the corner of my eye. It wasn't long inside the cave, maybe 10-15 minutes....then we hopped back on the inner tubes and got the hell out. It was fun but I wasn't wanting to hang around in there too long. We headed back through the fields to the village where a dodgy lunch awaited us. I took a few bites and thought I should stop before spewing all over our hosts. Might not be considered too polite....
Now came the kayaking. I was excited but a little concerned as I've only done it once and that was a few years ago in Tennessee...Or maybe it was North Carolina. I don't remember. Somewhere around there. But that doesn't matter. My point is, I was concerned. We had the option of single person kayaks or doubling up. We decided to double up. Big mistake. We ended up fighting most of the time, Gan was in back and said I was fucking him up while he's trying to steer. He's barking out orders and it took everything in me not to whack him in the head with my paddle. We flipped on the rapids. 3 of them to be precise. Two were not such big deals, we easily got back in the kayak and there was no damage done...But one, however, was not so simple. It was at this awful bend in the river and the rocks were more numerous and larger and the thing is we'd gotten lodged against this rock and almost tipped but managed to balance ourselves out again....and then these freakin' Brits came along and ran into us and we flipped over instantly....The water was moving so fast and I remembered that the guide said if we were caught in the current to keep our feet up and go with the flow....Okay, but what about the huge ass rocks that are in front of me and I'm on my back and can't see shit?? I got slammed hard into this rock and was trying to grab onto it and turn myself around when I see a kayak heading straight for me (those damn Brits again!!) and they pin me up against the rock. The guide makes his way over and is pulling on my life vest to get me out and I manage to scrape the shit out of my knees climbing up on top of the rock. Oh yeah, no idea where my paddle is either. I crawl over to this sandbank and wait for Gannon, the guide and our kayak. I should also mention that all of our kayaks had holes in the back which the guide tried to plug up with leaves. Got that? Leaves. So he's emptying out our kayak and Gan and I are trying to laugh about the ridiculousness of it all....We hop back on board and continue on our way. We all find our way to this spot where there are multi-level, chill-out spots made of bamboo. There were straw mats and some cushions. Some area were covered, some were in the sun. They lined the right side of the bank which was very steep. Built up about 30 ft. in the air were two platform from which to leap off, holding onto a lever which would swing you out over the water and drop you in. Looked like fun but no fucking way, man. We stopped off there for about an hour and had some beers. We got back in the water and it was slow moving. Our kayak kept filling up with water and we were sinking. The rest of our group was way ahead of us at this point and we had to stop off to drain out the kayak a couple of times. We never did catch up with them again, they actually just left us behind! We came to the end of the line and deposited our kayak and life vests.
That night we hit this spot a couple doors down from our guesthouse and ran into those Irish guys that we'd met on the way into Laos. We hung out upstairs and had more drinks than we should have and this other guy that we'd met showed up and offered up the opium pipe. By midnight we were all a bit wasted but they knew of this other spot down by the river that we should check out. We wandered down to the edge of town and followed this tiny little bamboo bridge over the water. It deposited us in this totally ethereal world filled with bamboo groves which broke up into little sections. There was one spot with a bonfire and loads of people dancing. There was another spot with half a dozen hammocks strung up in the trees. There were bamboo platforms, raised a couple of feet off the ground with colorful pillows and mats. The guys brought back mushroom shakes. Hm. I should have learned my lesson in Thailand. But I drank it anyway. It didn't do shit though which I was actually kind of glad about. I was not in the mood to have an intense mind-altering experience. I curled up in a hammock and zoned. I found Gannon a little while later and said I was tired, we headed back to the room.
The next day we had the worst hangover ever and I was reminded of all the times my mother has berated me for putting so many toxins into my body, etc. Yes, mom, I'm hearin' ya loud and clear. It's stupid and irresponsible....but.....how come it's so much fun? It was a lazy day, we finally managed to get our asses out of the room for dinner and someone was looking out for us because we found a place that was playing "Family Guy"...We have been looking for it since we started this trip. Bless these enlightened people.
We are going tubing now in an hour, we ended up staying here 3 more nights than we'd intended. We're running short on time, we only have a 15 day visa...We catch a bus tomorrow morning to Luang Prabang which is supposed to be the Buddhist spiritual capital of Laos. Good stuff....