All Penises Are Lovely
Last night when I was walking through a neighborhood in the suburbs, three twelve-year-old boys were messing around outside. They kept mumbling the words, "ask her!" and the others would reply, "no, you ask her!" and they were nudging each other towards me. I turned to them and told them whatever it was, they shouldn't be embarrassed to ask. But they claimed it was way too inappropriate to say. But I insisted that there was no question that could possibly phase me. They continued on debating who would ask me the question, and I told them I wasn't leaving until someone asked, because at this point I was dying of curiosity of what twelve-year-old boys considered scandalous. Fast forward eight minutes and they finally agree that they'll cross the street, hide behind a car, and yell the question to me. This sounded completely ridiculous, but I was thoroughly amused. A minute later one of the boys called out, "Do you prefer circumcised, or uncircumcised penises?!" I died laughing, but when I finally caught my breath I shouted back, "They're all lovely! Love what ya got, boys!" People always tell me I'd make a great sex ed teacher, but for some reason I felt like a borderline pedophile.