(no subject)
well this semester has turned out to be shit, basically. i found out today i have a chance of failing the easiest math class in the world because i have missed a few quizzes (primarily because i completely fogot about them OR just didnt know about them). the test scores are pretty sad and i found out you have to pass with a 70 or better to pass the class and you still get no credit for it. anthropology class is a total burn out for me. four grades all semester, and i made a 72 or 78 on the first test, a 60 on the second one, and the research paper will probably not even be graded knowing my luck. english 102 is actually the only class i am happy with, even if i do have a pretty somber C. intro. to drawing is a complete unknown, no one has gotten a midterm grade yet and i just remembered the sketch pad is due tomorrow, fuck. i guess the only thing to blame is myself, but it has me all worried. i mean, i jumped right into the university life right after high school which is better than my brothers, but i can just see myself following them and taking a hiatus until im 22. i wake up and remember aobut classes and i get sick to my stomach every day because i know im doing horrible and my parents are probably going to tear into me when i get that final grade. i cant believe that i want/think i can declare accounting as my major and do just fine in getting my degree. i can just feel a college drop out scenario coming. other than classes, i still smoke and drink more than i want/should. my curret state of life is going no where. n o w h e r e. im in a relationship again, but i cant say its perfect or that i have the feelings i should. my girlfriend is awesome and all the stuff is right there, but all this shit with school i guess is just blocking my mind. the dream girl ive had since sophomore year in high school is single again and i cant do a nything about that again. my best friend is still in california, and yeah shes coming in late may for a few months, but all i can get with her is four months of catching up and then waiting for the next big holiday to see her. i hate my job and i cant find another one for the life of me. my truck is a declining piece of shit that i want to sell but cant seem to for some reason. i still dress like i was found in a salvation army charity dump. im broke because of the hours i dont get at the job i hate. the inspiration a lot of people are feeling i just cant seem to grab. to be honest, i dont know where the fuck i am going or how im getting there. the only thing that is saving me from going insane is a playlist on winamp of all the classic rock i love, minus led zeppelin. i seriously just want to join some kind of armed force to get out of alabama, out of school, and still be productive. no one wants me to do that, but the more i consider it the more i feel that its a good idea. im starting to find that everyone has their own forte, like hustion is an english/philosophical wiz, angela is the health oriented doll that has high goals she meets, sarah is the hell-bent and married pyschologist, etc. etc. through all of my friends. i guess i dont really have that much to offer right now, i think that i am more than lazy, my aspirations are terrible, my state of mind is probably dragging me further down, my commitment to things is horrible. im content, but not happy. happiness is just far enough out of sight to tease me and piss me off. maybe ill let kris talk me into joining the air force for now.
How many roads most a man walk down
Before you call him a man ?
How many seas must a white dove sail
Before she sleeps in the sand ?
Yes, how many times must the cannon balls fly
Before they're forever banned ?
The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
Yes, how many years can a mountain exist
Before it's washed to the sea ?
Yes, how many years can some people exist
Before they're allowed to be free ?
Yes, how many times can a man turn his head
Pretending he just doesn't see ?
The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
Yes, how many times must a man look up
Before he can see the sky ?
Yes, how many ears must one man have
Before he can hear people cry ?
Yes, how many deaths will it take till he knows
That too many people have died ?
The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
dylan had the right idea about things.
How many roads most a man walk down
Before you call him a man ?
How many seas must a white dove sail
Before she sleeps in the sand ?
Yes, how many times must the cannon balls fly
Before they're forever banned ?
The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
Yes, how many years can a mountain exist
Before it's washed to the sea ?
Yes, how many years can some people exist
Before they're allowed to be free ?
Yes, how many times can a man turn his head
Pretending he just doesn't see ?
The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
Yes, how many times must a man look up
Before he can see the sky ?
Yes, how many ears must one man have
Before he can hear people cry ?
Yes, how many deaths will it take till he knows
That too many people have died ?
The answer my friend is blowin' in the wind
The answer is blowin' in the wind.
dylan had the right idea about things.