(no subject)
Well I had a long talk with a good friend of mine... Mike about everything... about well Muffin... everything...
In return he told me of his ex Miranda... how he hates her and called her a bitch... I just listened and told him my side of the story... (you know there's always two sides) he told me just to forget about it, he can't fuck anything up for me anymore... he's dead... atleast to me... he died in a train wreck and he couldn't save his self... I cried for a second and Mike and I are going to have a funeral of our own for the dearly parted Muffin... with of course... a shoe box...
Mike is thinking about something, but what I don't even want to know... I don't want to trust anyone... not now... I'm weak because of the first loss... poor muffin... he didn't even see it coming... and then poof... just like that, he was gone...
Gone from my life, gone from a part of me that adds to a long line of abuse and all I do is smile... I also cry in silence, not for myself, but for the people who didn't for me... for the people who can't... and for the people who were hurt like me... I pray as much as I can... but you can never pray enough... never....
I thought about the handsome Josh Maddy... and how he went with the ways of Muffin... not knowing of his revenge he had plotted out for me... how he wanted me to choose...
Josh you don't know what's going on and if you were a part of it then wow... but all in all... you told me you didn't know what to think and muffin told me you had no feelings for me... this shows me who was lying to whom about the whole thing... but it's done now, I will let him win for his death (but only for the moment)... I will wait to make the right move on him... not harmful, but charming for he has done nothing wrong by me afore, I shan't to it apon him...
:) all in all I'm fine... Bi-polar is calm, I talked with Mrs. Barnes and she helped me find an herbal remedy to fix my brain... headaches, everything... she's going to find the number and help me instead of ignoring me till it was too late... she wants to help fix me... come in every morning and see her... :) Justine says she must like me... I've been told I remind her of her daughter... FSU all the way! :) She very nice and modest, and to me pretty even though she is an older, more wise woman... I think they picked the right woman for the job, I don't where I'd be without having her to talk too...
I also got pants'd today infront of all of 4th lunch... ::blushes:: it's all Joe's fault... but I fell for it... he told me to put my arms up so I did then pants'd me while my guard was down, I ran off and cried for about a minute in shock... it's was worse then being trash-canned by seniors... when you're a senior! lol
Well... nap time! Night!
In return he told me of his ex Miranda... how he hates her and called her a bitch... I just listened and told him my side of the story... (you know there's always two sides) he told me just to forget about it, he can't fuck anything up for me anymore... he's dead... atleast to me... he died in a train wreck and he couldn't save his self... I cried for a second and Mike and I are going to have a funeral of our own for the dearly parted Muffin... with of course... a shoe box...
Mike is thinking about something, but what I don't even want to know... I don't want to trust anyone... not now... I'm weak because of the first loss... poor muffin... he didn't even see it coming... and then poof... just like that, he was gone...
Gone from my life, gone from a part of me that adds to a long line of abuse and all I do is smile... I also cry in silence, not for myself, but for the people who didn't for me... for the people who can't... and for the people who were hurt like me... I pray as much as I can... but you can never pray enough... never....
I thought about the handsome Josh Maddy... and how he went with the ways of Muffin... not knowing of his revenge he had plotted out for me... how he wanted me to choose...
Josh you don't know what's going on and if you were a part of it then wow... but all in all... you told me you didn't know what to think and muffin told me you had no feelings for me... this shows me who was lying to whom about the whole thing... but it's done now, I will let him win for his death (but only for the moment)... I will wait to make the right move on him... not harmful, but charming for he has done nothing wrong by me afore, I shan't to it apon him...
:) all in all I'm fine... Bi-polar is calm, I talked with Mrs. Barnes and she helped me find an herbal remedy to fix my brain... headaches, everything... she's going to find the number and help me instead of ignoring me till it was too late... she wants to help fix me... come in every morning and see her... :) Justine says she must like me... I've been told I remind her of her daughter... FSU all the way! :) She very nice and modest, and to me pretty even though she is an older, more wise woman... I think they picked the right woman for the job, I don't where I'd be without having her to talk too...
I also got pants'd today infront of all of 4th lunch... ::blushes:: it's all Joe's fault... but I fell for it... he told me to put my arms up so I did then pants'd me while my guard was down, I ran off and cried for about a minute in shock... it's was worse then being trash-canned by seniors... when you're a senior! lol
Well... nap time! Night!