soo fucked up
why is it that every morning i wake up and i feel as if i am not wanted? is it because i am not or is it because i jsut think this way al the time so i believe it? either way i am nto wanted so i took 11 pills tonight that are 200mg a pill i am all trippin and shit. its crazy! Kielon told me that he wil do some coke with me tomorrow...hopefully he does i dont care any more i give up i cant take this shit anymore i am turing to be like my sister Kelleigh witch i totally hate but oh well.. i guess you jsut got to live alittle! i am sorry to anyone who thinks i am such a bad person but for this summer its gunna be all abotu the partying and gettign fucked up for me! cause thats all i am gunna do unless i am with Cheylenne and leslie cause they wont let me and shit but yea..i just soo badly want to like die or soemthing i mena what is life? i dont really knwo you know? i am jsut soo sad right now and depressed i really could give a fuck i mean i care that peopel are trying to help me but really there not there jsut makin it wose unless you knwo what i am goin thing through and feel my pain then you have no idea how to help me its soo fucked up to wehere i dont think anyone could help me. i know i have problems but hell leave me be i dont go around and tell your parents abotu your peoblems or your life! JENNY YOU FUCKED EVERYTHING UP FOR ME YOU DONT EVN KNOW! first off to people who dont know the storyhere it is ....... Well one day wen to my firned joannas house and well we drank took some pills and then went and got high so i was really fucked up i dont even remeber half the night but i fguess jenny found out soem how cause i dont go to school the next day but anyways she called my step mom and told her that i got fucked up at my friends house i mena how and the hell would do that? not me i sure in hell would never do that to a friend! SO FUCK YOU JENNY!! oh and the fact that her and cheylenne dont get along at al is worse cause i love cheylenne to deth and i allways will! but jenny has to ask all liek competive around her liek tery and stewl me away i jsut want to be lieft alone i dont want to play games with anyone i jsut would liek to live my life how ever i would like! i cant even liek get my thoughts out its soo hard for me i cant even liek discribe tyhem its hard DAMN! i wish i could jsut liek cxal some one or something but i am not goin to cause its like 1:50 in the mornign and i dont want to wake anyone up that would get mad but yea i am gunna go cause i am really tripping and i thinki should go liek pass out soem where and yea peobably die but who the hell cares!? NO ONE!!!!!!