No Law - Chapter Six: Before and After
Title: No Law
Pairings: Arthur/Merlin, Arthur/Gwen, Arthur/Gwen/Merlin
Rating: R
Summary:
It was a silly thing. Just a wine stain on a very white shirt removed by magical means. But now, Arthur knows about the magic, and everything is not quite as Merlin would have expected. Arthur is weirdly vulnerable and brilliant, Gaius is growing distant and mysterious and maybe a little bit insane, and Gwen knows exactly just where she wants her boys to be.
Or: The one where Arthur finds out about the magic, is angry about the lies but not at Merlin, and things keep changing. Also, fathers are a difficult thing to have.
Warning: Some intriguing sex (het, slash and threesome). Plotting Gaius is plotting. Goes AU somewhen in the hiatus between S4 and S5.
Disclaimer: The characters and concept of this version of the Arthurian legends belong to Shine and the BBC, not to me. I'm just playing with them.
Author's Note: Reply to this prompt on kinkme_merlin: http://kinkme-merlin.livejournal.com/33344.html?thread=34990656#t34990656
First Chapter:
Teaser: Where Gaius gets an unwelcome surprise and things start to get wonky
Before and After
There were times when Gwen still felt silly in nightshirts that could have easily doubled as festive gowns (and she was tempted to try it out, just once, to see if anyone would notice that The Queen was actually wearing her night-things to a Formal Banquet - anyone other than Arthur that is; her husband had a disturbingly sharp eye for what the fashionable noblewoman was wearing any given season. Gwen supposed/suspected/hoped that it had something to do with Morgana and the close bond the siblings had once shared). Mostly, however, she was grateful for her elegant nightdresses because they offered her the possibility to look splendid and dignified at any time of night. As she had found out very quickly, that was absolutely essential, especially for her, The Queen Of Humble Birth.
It had taken her exactly one night as said queen to learn that royals had no privacy whatsoever. People expected their King and Queen to be simply available, no matter the hour, and if it was not that, then they were - more or less discretely - attempting to Serve or to Guard them. Gwen had never realised how exhausting that could be while she had still been on the other side of the equation. Arthur, who was very used to the whole thing, treated everyone who laid claim to his time and who wasn’t Merlin or Gwaine with surprising patience and a coveted brand of humour Gwen had failed to notice before.
She would never forget the morning after her wedding night, when she opened her eyes to George standing ramrod straight at the foot of the Royal Bed and commencing to announce in excruciating and very loud detail how the festive proceedings had progressed after the Royal Couple had left. Only her complete astonishment had prevented her from screaming her head off, while Arthur silently laughed into his pillow, mumbling something about how even woodworm-expeditions were preferable to an overzealous master of ceremonies. Only Merlin arriving with the Royal Breakfast had finally stemmed the font of useless information that was George, by which point Gwen had realised that she was wearing absolutely nothing besides a thin bed sheet and subsequently tried to die of mortification, while Merlin and George were bickering over which of them had more right to be here that early in the morning. Then, Arthur had kindly saved the day by jumping out of bed, strutting around unselfconsciously and stark-naked, and yelling at Merlin to fetch him some clothes and take George with him while he was at it because Merlin wouldn’t find his own backside after a night of indulging in unnamed amounts of alcohol and possibly frolicking around the castle with the likes of Gwaine.
Hence Gwen’s gratefulness for over-elaborate nightgowns, although she still sometimes peeked under the Royal Bed before going to sleep because she didn’t put it past any of their subjects to hide under there in order to discreetly stand (or, in this case, lie) guard over (or in this case, under) The King And Queen while they did their Duty For The Love Of Camelot. In hindsight, though, she much preferred the absurdity that had been the morning of her wedding night to Gaius kneeling at her feet, while she was still holding the brush she had been using when the old physician had entered the Royal Chambers in distress, throwing himself on the ground before her and clutching her legs through her stateliest nightgown. It was hard to not stare at him open-mouthed, and it would have been even harder had she not been dressed like the queen she was but didn’t always feel like.
“What are you talking about, Gaius?” she finally managed in her most Royal Tone, while attempting to puzzle out what her old friend was trying to tell her. Merlin had magic? Arthur was going to have Merlin killed? She shook her head incredulously. “You are not making any sense.”
The mixture of pain and desperate hope that marred his dear old face when he looked up made her ache for him, but it also made her very uncomfortable.
“Milady,” he rasped, “I beg you, you have to help Merlin. He only ever did what was best for Camelot and for Arthur. And even for you! You don’t know how many times he saved you and how he fought for your relationship with the king. All he ever wanted was for Arthur to take his rightful place and unite Albion, with you at his side. Please, milady, none of us would be where we are today if it were not for Merlin, and I know you have always regarded him as a friend. I beseech you: help him.”
Carefully, Gwen put the brush on the table and placed her hands over Gaius’s old and weathered ones. They felt like dry parchment under her fingers.
“Gaius, I don’t doubt that Merlin has done all those things you say. But I can’t understand why you would believe that Arthur would want him harm.”
The physician shook his head wildly. With the candle light reflecting in his white hair, he looked a little bit bizarre.
“You have not seen the king when he was in my quarters, milady! He is … he is furious. You of all people know how he reacts to what he perceives as betrayal. However, I doubt that a sorcerer will get off with nothing but a short banishment.”
As opposed to an adulteress, you mean, she thought but didn’t say it out loud, although it took her all her hard-learned Royal Dignity not to. Knowing that she wouldn’t be able to remain a Fair And Just Queen if she took his words to heart, she decided that it was Gaius’s distress talking and that she should concentrate on the cause of his words and not their content.
“Nothing will happen to Merlin,” she reassured him. “Arthur might shout and rage and possibly throw a few things at him, and then he will …” She fell silent, because Gaius didn’t need to know that Arthur would most probably look at Merlin as if he had driven a dagger through his heart and twisted it, and that that would hurt Merlin a lot more than all the shouting and the throwing of shoes and cutlery.
“You didn’t see the king!” the old man at her feet insisted. “He thinks Merlin has deceived and manipulated him and that might just have been one betrayal too much. I doubt he still has it in his heart to forgive something like that.”
Gwen took her hands off the old man’s and stood up. Gaius flinched, probably because of the expression on her face.
“Then you know nothing of your king’s heart,” she said, too quietly incensed to be careful of her tone. She loved Gaius and she could understand that he would panic given the circumstances, but he was being both unreasonable and presumptuous. Gaius lowered his head, though Gwen still caught a glimpse of the despair that settled on his face. She sighed.
“You really believe that Arthur would have Merlin killed?”
“I’m afraid that he will, milady. Magic is not something the Pendragons are level-headed about. I fear Arthur will let himself be led by his immediate emotions and do something he might even regret later. Please, if you don’t want to speak to the king on Merlin’s behalf, do it for the sake of your husband. Do it for the sake of us all!”
Gwen looked down on the bent old head and had the feeling that she was missing something essential. The evening had taken a very strange turn, even for Camelot, and she would get to the bottom of it.
“Very well, Gaius. I will go and talk to my husband. But know this: Whatever else Merlin has done, he has broken the law, and the last word about this will be spoken by the king.”
Gaius nodded but wrung his hands, and Gwen could see that they were shaking. She didn’t quite know whether she was feeling sorry for him or annoyed. Be that as it may, she could not just leave him kneeling there like that.
“Go back to your quarters, Gaius. I will send word to you as soon as I have spoken with the king.” She allowed a reassuring smile to show on her face. “Don’t worry, Gaius. I’m sure everything will turn out fine. Just look at me. You’re right when you say that I know what it is like to see Arthur furious. Indeed, I think I know it a lot better than you do. Because he was furious, Gaius, and just like Merlin, I did break the law. By all rights, he could have had me killed, too. And yet here I am.”
Gaius looked at her miserably. “You had the king’s love for you to prevent the worst, milady. Merlin has nothing.”
Gwen stared at her old friend und wondered how men could be that utterly blind. She didn’t know how to put her thoughts into words, though. If he couldn’t see what was right in front of his eyes, then she was at a loss how to speak with him. Finally, she settled on another “Don’t worry, Gaius”, before leaving the Royal Chambers. She couldn’t help but notice, though, that the old physician didn’t seem particularly reassured.
The image of Gaius kneeling on the floor and looking desperate, like a father about to lose his only son, stayed with her while she walked through the hallways towards Arthur’s Hideout (also erroneously known as his former chambers). It was the first place she would check whenever she knew that something was eating at him - either that or the training grounds. Why had her old friend been that frantic and so sure that Arthur would execute Merlin for his crimes? Gwen could admit to herself that his words had distressed her for various reasons that had all to do with herself, but what baffled her most was his utter conviction that her husband wouldn’t be merciful - to Merlin, of all people!
Gwen had known Gaius for as long as she could remember, and she had always regarded him as the most wise, knowledgeable and reliable of all royal advisors. What had Arthur done to turn him into a haunted shadow of himself, into someone who seemed to have lost all faith in both his king and the inherent goodness of the boy he had helped to raise?
She quickened her pace, growing more worried by the second. Back in the Royal Chambers, she had not felt at all concerned for Merlin’s safety, but what if there was the slightest possibility that Gaius’s fears were even the least bit justified? Gaius was right with one thing: she hadn’t seen Arthur. And she couldn’t even imagine what had gone through her husband’s mind when he had learnt that the person he trusted most had deceived him, just like everybody else.
Gwen started to run. No, Arthur wouldn’t harm Merlin, not while in his right mind. But he had been hurt and betrayed so often that it might just be conceivable that this was the one thing that had the power to turn him against his Manservant. And Arthur would never forgive himself if he did something to his friend in the heat of the moment, never. He had not hurt her, back then, but she was a woman, and Arthur’s sense of chivalry was even deeper engrained than …
The doors to the King’s Hideout appeared before her, and when Gwen charged through them like a knight in shining nightgown, she was greeted by a very strange sight indeed. She froze and simply stared at the rare spectacle in front of her. A part of her brain started to coo adoringly, but she also felt quite stupid. What the hell had Gaius been thinking? What had she been thinking?
Gwen crossed her arms in front of her chest and met the two pairs of blue eyes regarding her with quite similar sheepish expressions. They still hadn’t let go of each other. She cleared her throat.
“Unless you are attempting to hug Merlin to death, dear husband, there is something very wrong with Gaius.”
Merlin entangled himself from Arthur at her words, looking confused, but Gwen’s focus of attention remained on her husband and the tense, dark expression flittering over his face. Oh. So Gaius wasn’t just getting senile after all. Something had happened, although she doubted that it was what the old physician had preceived it to be. Her heart started to ache like a muscle sore after a long day of heavy lifting.
“What’s wrong with Gaius?” Merlin asked, his concern evident, and the expression on Arthur’s face intensified for a second before he shut down completely.
“I don’t know. But he seemed very upset,” Gwen answered, not taking her eyes off her husband. Although he met her gaze straight on, she couldn’t read him in the least. What happened?, she tried to ask him with her eyes. He didn’t react, didn’t even blink.
“Arthur? Does Gaius know …?”
Arthur’s eyes flickered to Merlin and so did Gwen’s. Merlin was biting his lip, looking uncommonly hesitant. Oh. So the part about the magic was true as well. Huh.
“I’ve talked to him,” Arthur said neutrally, drawing Gwen’s attention again. His jaw was clenched and his eyes had a hard glint to them that she only noticed because she was familiar with it. Merlin seemed to miss it, though, maybe due to his concern for Gaius, maybe because he had never had it directed at him.
“Oh God, what did you say to him? Did you forget to mention the not executing me part? You did, didn’t you? He’s probably worried sick. Poor Gaius! Don’t tell me you tried to reassure him with chicken, too? Gaius is not that familiar with your ways of communicating, you know. He’s been afraid of this day for years. And he’s not really used to kings being merciful. You have to spell it out for him.”
“Then do it,” Arthur said calmly, much too calmly. Gwen clutched at her upper arms in order to prevent herself from reaching out to her husband. “Go to Gaius and show him that you’re still alive, if that’s what it takes. And tell him that you will remain that way while you’re at it. If you have to.”
“Are you sure?”
Gwen could hear Merlin’s indecision in his voice. Her friend was frightingly attuned to Arthur’s moods and he was far from stupid. Of course he could tell that something wasn’t quite right. What that might be, was anyone’s guess, however, and not even Merlin could read the king’s mind. Gwen wondered whether Arthur would have opened up to his manservant if she hadn’t been there, and contemplated leaving for a second, but she couldn’t quite bring herself to do it. Her instincts told her to stay.
“Go,” Arthur ordered, complete with a shooing gesture. “We wouldn’t want Gaius to do himself some harm, would we now?”
Merlin regarded his king for a moment longer, his head tilted to the side and his eyes wide and curious. Then, he smiled his big, brilliant smile that always made Gwen want to pinch his cheeks.
“I will! Thank you, Arthur.”
He had almost bounded past Gwen, when Arthur’s voice made him turn around: “Come right back here after you’re done.”
A furrow appeared on Merlin’s brow for a moment, but it was chased off by another grin and a happy nod.
“He should be back in his quarters,” Gwen called after Merlin’s retreating back and got a grateful wave in return. She hesitated for a second, but then she closed the door and turned to face her husband.
Arthur was still standing at the same spot that he had been when Gwen had entered the room. His posture, however, couldn’t have been more different. Both his fists were clenched as tightly as his jaw, his shoulders were rigid, and Gwen could feel the tension radiating off him from where she stood. His eyes looked as if they were bleeding blue, and the sore ache in her heart grew sharper.
“Oh, Arthur,” she sighed. “What have you done?”
Chapter Seven:
Where Merlin's world is turned upside down and Arthur's inside out
Pairings: Arthur/Merlin, Arthur/Gwen, Arthur/Gwen/Merlin
Rating: R
Summary:
It was a silly thing. Just a wine stain on a very white shirt removed by magical means. But now, Arthur knows about the magic, and everything is not quite as Merlin would have expected. Arthur is weirdly vulnerable and brilliant, Gaius is growing distant and mysterious and maybe a little bit insane, and Gwen knows exactly just where she wants her boys to be.
Or: The one where Arthur finds out about the magic, is angry about the lies but not at Merlin, and things keep changing. Also, fathers are a difficult thing to have.
Warning: Some intriguing sex (het, slash and threesome). Plotting Gaius is plotting. Goes AU somewhen in the hiatus between S4 and S5.
Disclaimer: The characters and concept of this version of the Arthurian legends belong to Shine and the BBC, not to me. I'm just playing with them.
Author's Note: Reply to this prompt on kinkme_merlin: http://kinkme-merlin.livejournal.com/33344.html?thread=34990656#t34990656
First Chapter:
Teaser: Where Gaius gets an unwelcome surprise and things start to get wonky
Before and After
There were times when Gwen still felt silly in nightshirts that could have easily doubled as festive gowns (and she was tempted to try it out, just once, to see if anyone would notice that The Queen was actually wearing her night-things to a Formal Banquet - anyone other than Arthur that is; her husband had a disturbingly sharp eye for what the fashionable noblewoman was wearing any given season. Gwen supposed/suspected/hoped that it had something to do with Morgana and the close bond the siblings had once shared). Mostly, however, she was grateful for her elegant nightdresses because they offered her the possibility to look splendid and dignified at any time of night. As she had found out very quickly, that was absolutely essential, especially for her, The Queen Of Humble Birth.
It had taken her exactly one night as said queen to learn that royals had no privacy whatsoever. People expected their King and Queen to be simply available, no matter the hour, and if it was not that, then they were - more or less discretely - attempting to Serve or to Guard them. Gwen had never realised how exhausting that could be while she had still been on the other side of the equation. Arthur, who was very used to the whole thing, treated everyone who laid claim to his time and who wasn’t Merlin or Gwaine with surprising patience and a coveted brand of humour Gwen had failed to notice before.
She would never forget the morning after her wedding night, when she opened her eyes to George standing ramrod straight at the foot of the Royal Bed and commencing to announce in excruciating and very loud detail how the festive proceedings had progressed after the Royal Couple had left. Only her complete astonishment had prevented her from screaming her head off, while Arthur silently laughed into his pillow, mumbling something about how even woodworm-expeditions were preferable to an overzealous master of ceremonies. Only Merlin arriving with the Royal Breakfast had finally stemmed the font of useless information that was George, by which point Gwen had realised that she was wearing absolutely nothing besides a thin bed sheet and subsequently tried to die of mortification, while Merlin and George were bickering over which of them had more right to be here that early in the morning. Then, Arthur had kindly saved the day by jumping out of bed, strutting around unselfconsciously and stark-naked, and yelling at Merlin to fetch him some clothes and take George with him while he was at it because Merlin wouldn’t find his own backside after a night of indulging in unnamed amounts of alcohol and possibly frolicking around the castle with the likes of Gwaine.
Hence Gwen’s gratefulness for over-elaborate nightgowns, although she still sometimes peeked under the Royal Bed before going to sleep because she didn’t put it past any of their subjects to hide under there in order to discreetly stand (or, in this case, lie) guard over (or in this case, under) The King And Queen while they did their Duty For The Love Of Camelot. In hindsight, though, she much preferred the absurdity that had been the morning of her wedding night to Gaius kneeling at her feet, while she was still holding the brush she had been using when the old physician had entered the Royal Chambers in distress, throwing himself on the ground before her and clutching her legs through her stateliest nightgown. It was hard to not stare at him open-mouthed, and it would have been even harder had she not been dressed like the queen she was but didn’t always feel like.
“What are you talking about, Gaius?” she finally managed in her most Royal Tone, while attempting to puzzle out what her old friend was trying to tell her. Merlin had magic? Arthur was going to have Merlin killed? She shook her head incredulously. “You are not making any sense.”
The mixture of pain and desperate hope that marred his dear old face when he looked up made her ache for him, but it also made her very uncomfortable.
“Milady,” he rasped, “I beg you, you have to help Merlin. He only ever did what was best for Camelot and for Arthur. And even for you! You don’t know how many times he saved you and how he fought for your relationship with the king. All he ever wanted was for Arthur to take his rightful place and unite Albion, with you at his side. Please, milady, none of us would be where we are today if it were not for Merlin, and I know you have always regarded him as a friend. I beseech you: help him.”
Carefully, Gwen put the brush on the table and placed her hands over Gaius’s old and weathered ones. They felt like dry parchment under her fingers.
“Gaius, I don’t doubt that Merlin has done all those things you say. But I can’t understand why you would believe that Arthur would want him harm.”
The physician shook his head wildly. With the candle light reflecting in his white hair, he looked a little bit bizarre.
“You have not seen the king when he was in my quarters, milady! He is … he is furious. You of all people know how he reacts to what he perceives as betrayal. However, I doubt that a sorcerer will get off with nothing but a short banishment.”
As opposed to an adulteress, you mean, she thought but didn’t say it out loud, although it took her all her hard-learned Royal Dignity not to. Knowing that she wouldn’t be able to remain a Fair And Just Queen if she took his words to heart, she decided that it was Gaius’s distress talking and that she should concentrate on the cause of his words and not their content.
“Nothing will happen to Merlin,” she reassured him. “Arthur might shout and rage and possibly throw a few things at him, and then he will …” She fell silent, because Gaius didn’t need to know that Arthur would most probably look at Merlin as if he had driven a dagger through his heart and twisted it, and that that would hurt Merlin a lot more than all the shouting and the throwing of shoes and cutlery.
“You didn’t see the king!” the old man at her feet insisted. “He thinks Merlin has deceived and manipulated him and that might just have been one betrayal too much. I doubt he still has it in his heart to forgive something like that.”
Gwen took her hands off the old man’s and stood up. Gaius flinched, probably because of the expression on her face.
“Then you know nothing of your king’s heart,” she said, too quietly incensed to be careful of her tone. She loved Gaius and she could understand that he would panic given the circumstances, but he was being both unreasonable and presumptuous. Gaius lowered his head, though Gwen still caught a glimpse of the despair that settled on his face. She sighed.
“You really believe that Arthur would have Merlin killed?”
“I’m afraid that he will, milady. Magic is not something the Pendragons are level-headed about. I fear Arthur will let himself be led by his immediate emotions and do something he might even regret later. Please, if you don’t want to speak to the king on Merlin’s behalf, do it for the sake of your husband. Do it for the sake of us all!”
Gwen looked down on the bent old head and had the feeling that she was missing something essential. The evening had taken a very strange turn, even for Camelot, and she would get to the bottom of it.
“Very well, Gaius. I will go and talk to my husband. But know this: Whatever else Merlin has done, he has broken the law, and the last word about this will be spoken by the king.”
Gaius nodded but wrung his hands, and Gwen could see that they were shaking. She didn’t quite know whether she was feeling sorry for him or annoyed. Be that as it may, she could not just leave him kneeling there like that.
“Go back to your quarters, Gaius. I will send word to you as soon as I have spoken with the king.” She allowed a reassuring smile to show on her face. “Don’t worry, Gaius. I’m sure everything will turn out fine. Just look at me. You’re right when you say that I know what it is like to see Arthur furious. Indeed, I think I know it a lot better than you do. Because he was furious, Gaius, and just like Merlin, I did break the law. By all rights, he could have had me killed, too. And yet here I am.”
Gaius looked at her miserably. “You had the king’s love for you to prevent the worst, milady. Merlin has nothing.”
Gwen stared at her old friend und wondered how men could be that utterly blind. She didn’t know how to put her thoughts into words, though. If he couldn’t see what was right in front of his eyes, then she was at a loss how to speak with him. Finally, she settled on another “Don’t worry, Gaius”, before leaving the Royal Chambers. She couldn’t help but notice, though, that the old physician didn’t seem particularly reassured.
The image of Gaius kneeling on the floor and looking desperate, like a father about to lose his only son, stayed with her while she walked through the hallways towards Arthur’s Hideout (also erroneously known as his former chambers). It was the first place she would check whenever she knew that something was eating at him - either that or the training grounds. Why had her old friend been that frantic and so sure that Arthur would execute Merlin for his crimes? Gwen could admit to herself that his words had distressed her for various reasons that had all to do with herself, but what baffled her most was his utter conviction that her husband wouldn’t be merciful - to Merlin, of all people!
Gwen had known Gaius for as long as she could remember, and she had always regarded him as the most wise, knowledgeable and reliable of all royal advisors. What had Arthur done to turn him into a haunted shadow of himself, into someone who seemed to have lost all faith in both his king and the inherent goodness of the boy he had helped to raise?
She quickened her pace, growing more worried by the second. Back in the Royal Chambers, she had not felt at all concerned for Merlin’s safety, but what if there was the slightest possibility that Gaius’s fears were even the least bit justified? Gaius was right with one thing: she hadn’t seen Arthur. And she couldn’t even imagine what had gone through her husband’s mind when he had learnt that the person he trusted most had deceived him, just like everybody else.
Gwen started to run. No, Arthur wouldn’t harm Merlin, not while in his right mind. But he had been hurt and betrayed so often that it might just be conceivable that this was the one thing that had the power to turn him against his Manservant. And Arthur would never forgive himself if he did something to his friend in the heat of the moment, never. He had not hurt her, back then, but she was a woman, and Arthur’s sense of chivalry was even deeper engrained than …
The doors to the King’s Hideout appeared before her, and when Gwen charged through them like a knight in shining nightgown, she was greeted by a very strange sight indeed. She froze and simply stared at the rare spectacle in front of her. A part of her brain started to coo adoringly, but she also felt quite stupid. What the hell had Gaius been thinking? What had she been thinking?
Gwen crossed her arms in front of her chest and met the two pairs of blue eyes regarding her with quite similar sheepish expressions. They still hadn’t let go of each other. She cleared her throat.
“Unless you are attempting to hug Merlin to death, dear husband, there is something very wrong with Gaius.”
Merlin entangled himself from Arthur at her words, looking confused, but Gwen’s focus of attention remained on her husband and the tense, dark expression flittering over his face. Oh. So Gaius wasn’t just getting senile after all. Something had happened, although she doubted that it was what the old physician had preceived it to be. Her heart started to ache like a muscle sore after a long day of heavy lifting.
“What’s wrong with Gaius?” Merlin asked, his concern evident, and the expression on Arthur’s face intensified for a second before he shut down completely.
“I don’t know. But he seemed very upset,” Gwen answered, not taking her eyes off her husband. Although he met her gaze straight on, she couldn’t read him in the least. What happened?, she tried to ask him with her eyes. He didn’t react, didn’t even blink.
“Arthur? Does Gaius know …?”
Arthur’s eyes flickered to Merlin and so did Gwen’s. Merlin was biting his lip, looking uncommonly hesitant. Oh. So the part about the magic was true as well. Huh.
“I’ve talked to him,” Arthur said neutrally, drawing Gwen’s attention again. His jaw was clenched and his eyes had a hard glint to them that she only noticed because she was familiar with it. Merlin seemed to miss it, though, maybe due to his concern for Gaius, maybe because he had never had it directed at him.
“Oh God, what did you say to him? Did you forget to mention the not executing me part? You did, didn’t you? He’s probably worried sick. Poor Gaius! Don’t tell me you tried to reassure him with chicken, too? Gaius is not that familiar with your ways of communicating, you know. He’s been afraid of this day for years. And he’s not really used to kings being merciful. You have to spell it out for him.”
“Then do it,” Arthur said calmly, much too calmly. Gwen clutched at her upper arms in order to prevent herself from reaching out to her husband. “Go to Gaius and show him that you’re still alive, if that’s what it takes. And tell him that you will remain that way while you’re at it. If you have to.”
“Are you sure?”
Gwen could hear Merlin’s indecision in his voice. Her friend was frightingly attuned to Arthur’s moods and he was far from stupid. Of course he could tell that something wasn’t quite right. What that might be, was anyone’s guess, however, and not even Merlin could read the king’s mind. Gwen wondered whether Arthur would have opened up to his manservant if she hadn’t been there, and contemplated leaving for a second, but she couldn’t quite bring herself to do it. Her instincts told her to stay.
“Go,” Arthur ordered, complete with a shooing gesture. “We wouldn’t want Gaius to do himself some harm, would we now?”
Merlin regarded his king for a moment longer, his head tilted to the side and his eyes wide and curious. Then, he smiled his big, brilliant smile that always made Gwen want to pinch his cheeks.
“I will! Thank you, Arthur.”
He had almost bounded past Gwen, when Arthur’s voice made him turn around: “Come right back here after you’re done.”
A furrow appeared on Merlin’s brow for a moment, but it was chased off by another grin and a happy nod.
“He should be back in his quarters,” Gwen called after Merlin’s retreating back and got a grateful wave in return. She hesitated for a second, but then she closed the door and turned to face her husband.
Arthur was still standing at the same spot that he had been when Gwen had entered the room. His posture, however, couldn’t have been more different. Both his fists were clenched as tightly as his jaw, his shoulders were rigid, and Gwen could feel the tension radiating off him from where she stood. His eyes looked as if they were bleeding blue, and the sore ache in her heart grew sharper.
“Oh, Arthur,” she sighed. “What have you done?”
Chapter Seven:
Where Merlin's world is turned upside down and Arthur's inside out