The Next Stage
Things I Refuse to Ever Do Again
- Make a right turn on red without stopping.
- Leave my purse or anything valued at over $100 in my car overnight.
- Fall asleep at the beach without putting sun block on the back of my
legs.
- Eat black beans and rice before a night of heavy drinking.
- Forget to pee after a night of heavy drinking.
- Believe in anyone else's promises.
- Scorpios.
- Dance in heels that are not comfortable.
- Kiss and tell.
- Consume an entire bag of potato chips after tequila shots.
- Have massive amounts of cold medicine and tequila at the same time.
- Forget that life requires a lot of self esteem to keep on going.
Things I Refuse to Ever Do Again (The Dating Version)
- Date a person that is shorter than I am.
- Date a pushy vegetarian.
- Date a person that is involved in a symbiotic relationship
with narcotics and or alcohol.
- Remain in a relationship that is boring.
- Believe in anyone else's promises.
- Date someone with a mental illness that is keen on not taking
their drugs on a regular basis.
- Date someone with only one eyeball.
- Date someone without a car or a job.
- Take someone I'm dating to all my favorite places.
- Date someone from the Inland Valley.
- Date a Korean.
- Date someone still dependant on parental supervision for
existence.
- Go on a second date with someone that didn't compliment me on
the first.
- Wear an outfit that I am particularly fond of on a date.
- Date a person that takes longer than myself to get ready.
- Date a person more effeminate than I am.
- Go on a date with someone that insists on driving. (Thus
leaving me with no means of escape.)
- Drive more than an hour away, INCLUDING traffic, to go on a
first date.
- Date someone with a heavier accent than my grandmother.
- Date someone that is more involved with more animals than
human beings.
- Date someone that keeps stuffed animals.
- Date a person that still sleeps in a bunk bed.
- Make a right turn on red without stopping.
- Leave my purse or anything valued at over $100 in my car overnight.
- Fall asleep at the beach without putting sun block on the back of my
legs.
- Eat black beans and rice before a night of heavy drinking.
- Forget to pee after a night of heavy drinking.
- Believe in anyone else's promises.
- Scorpios.
- Dance in heels that are not comfortable.
- Kiss and tell.
- Consume an entire bag of potato chips after tequila shots.
- Have massive amounts of cold medicine and tequila at the same time.
- Forget that life requires a lot of self esteem to keep on going.
Things I Refuse to Ever Do Again (The Dating Version)
- Date a person that is shorter than I am.
- Date a pushy vegetarian.
- Date a person that is involved in a symbiotic relationship
with narcotics and or alcohol.
- Remain in a relationship that is boring.
- Believe in anyone else's promises.
- Date someone with a mental illness that is keen on not taking
their drugs on a regular basis.
- Date someone with only one eyeball.
- Date someone without a car or a job.
- Take someone I'm dating to all my favorite places.
- Date someone from the Inland Valley.
- Date a Korean.
- Date someone still dependant on parental supervision for
existence.
- Go on a second date with someone that didn't compliment me on
the first.
- Wear an outfit that I am particularly fond of on a date.
- Date a person that takes longer than myself to get ready.
- Date a person more effeminate than I am.
- Go on a date with someone that insists on driving. (Thus
leaving me with no means of escape.)
- Drive more than an hour away, INCLUDING traffic, to go on a
first date.
- Date someone with a heavier accent than my grandmother.
- Date someone that is more involved with more animals than
human beings.
- Date someone that keeps stuffed animals.
- Date a person that still sleeps in a bunk bed.