Just wondering
Last night I went to Yom Kippur services with my friends Brian, Becky, Robb and his wife Sarah. You might ask why was I celebrating the Jewish Day of Atonement. I'll tell you why...well, this is not the first time that I've gone to Synagogue since moving to St. Louis. My friend Brian, who is a student here, is Jewish. He invited me to a service months ago for a Liturgy assignment and ever since I've been hooked.
I think that this particular synagogue is special. I dont know much about the different movements and different types of Judaism. All I know that going to synagogue with him is the most spiritual and worthwhile worship experience since moving this side of the Mississippi River.
It's a small synagogue. Very intimate. The music is amazing and reaches some place in me that music doesn't usually reach with me. I'm not a huge music person...I playing flute in junior high and high school. I know good music when I hear it...but for me, typically speaking, music is not what affects me during a worship service.
Rabbi Jim usually leads what we sing. And it is amazing that we don't need to see notes on a page to be able to sing with him. Usually it's in Hebrew. Which is fun because I get to practice my Hebrew. I only know a few words, but I can read what is written out...even when there is nothing phonetically written for me. Usually they have an English translation of what we're doing and saying. But Rabbi's voice just reaches deep inside and touches something -- something spiritual -- something that gets missed in the worship services I usually attend. And he's a storyteller....an honest to god storyteller.
When I first attened synagogue, I was worried that I might be worshiping something that I shouldn't be -- because I was a Christian. But I'm not. I am more theocentric (God centered) than christocentric (Christ centered) anyway. But worshiping in at the syngogue allows me to tap my historic Christian roots. It's bad form not to realize that we, as Christians, have a lot of our tradition steeped in Judaism. And news flash -- Jesus and the Disciples were Jews!! I have a since of connected-ness there. So to some extent, I'm worshiping the way that they worshiped all those years ago. And it feels right.
As I've said, I've attended there a few times. Usually before and after my being there I begin to wonder if Judaism isn't for me. It seems to make since to me. However, I don't think that I can get rid of that Jesus dude. I think I speak this way because these services are able to reach me on a level that other services can't. I'm obviously missing something in my spiritual life that synagogue is able to help me reach. Before services last night someone asked me if I was thinking of converting...I think the friend was surprised of my answer. I said, "Well, it's not like I haven't thought about it." And that freaked me out a bit because I am Christian...and I'm not about to throw away 27 years of study and prayer and discerning. *This is usually the portion of the questioning where I begin to wonder if it's all real or not. But I'm not going that way today.* And I do believe in Jesus. But to what level and stuff -- I don't know. Is Jesus human? Divine? Both? Oh! My head is going to explode!
Brian said to me yesterday, "I think you were a Jew in your previous life." That gave me something to ponder even more. He said that I sit in awe and in childish wonder during services which he finds endearing. I don't think that was exacly his word...but something to that effect. I just don't know what I think. But Yay! for Yom Kippur services last night.
I think that this particular synagogue is special. I dont know much about the different movements and different types of Judaism. All I know that going to synagogue with him is the most spiritual and worthwhile worship experience since moving this side of the Mississippi River.
It's a small synagogue. Very intimate. The music is amazing and reaches some place in me that music doesn't usually reach with me. I'm not a huge music person...I playing flute in junior high and high school. I know good music when I hear it...but for me, typically speaking, music is not what affects me during a worship service.
Rabbi Jim usually leads what we sing. And it is amazing that we don't need to see notes on a page to be able to sing with him. Usually it's in Hebrew. Which is fun because I get to practice my Hebrew. I only know a few words, but I can read what is written out...even when there is nothing phonetically written for me. Usually they have an English translation of what we're doing and saying. But Rabbi's voice just reaches deep inside and touches something -- something spiritual -- something that gets missed in the worship services I usually attend. And he's a storyteller....an honest to god storyteller.
When I first attened synagogue, I was worried that I might be worshiping something that I shouldn't be -- because I was a Christian. But I'm not. I am more theocentric (God centered) than christocentric (Christ centered) anyway. But worshiping in at the syngogue allows me to tap my historic Christian roots. It's bad form not to realize that we, as Christians, have a lot of our tradition steeped in Judaism. And news flash -- Jesus and the Disciples were Jews!! I have a since of connected-ness there. So to some extent, I'm worshiping the way that they worshiped all those years ago. And it feels right.
As I've said, I've attended there a few times. Usually before and after my being there I begin to wonder if Judaism isn't for me. It seems to make since to me. However, I don't think that I can get rid of that Jesus dude. I think I speak this way because these services are able to reach me on a level that other services can't. I'm obviously missing something in my spiritual life that synagogue is able to help me reach. Before services last night someone asked me if I was thinking of converting...I think the friend was surprised of my answer. I said, "Well, it's not like I haven't thought about it." And that freaked me out a bit because I am Christian...and I'm not about to throw away 27 years of study and prayer and discerning. *This is usually the portion of the questioning where I begin to wonder if it's all real or not. But I'm not going that way today.* And I do believe in Jesus. But to what level and stuff -- I don't know. Is Jesus human? Divine? Both? Oh! My head is going to explode!
Brian said to me yesterday, "I think you were a Jew in your previous life." That gave me something to ponder even more. He said that I sit in awe and in childish wonder during services which he finds endearing. I don't think that was exacly his word...but something to that effect. I just don't know what I think. But Yay! for Yom Kippur services last night.