Ya-Ya Sisterhood
Watching Little Miss Sunshine left me grinning and thinking to myself that this is pretty much what all families are all about. Dysfunctional if you look closely yet so real that you can empathise with each of them and understand where they come from. It's the same with friends, who are the external family that we choose, the family created out of our choice.
It got me thinking of my pals...the five of us, who have known each other for more than a decade. Amongst the five, each has their own preferences and dynamics within the group yet we are part of that inexplicable bond. Sometimes, I can't fathom what it is that brought us together. Maybe the spiritedness of youth, the hanging together in college, the crazy times together and the fun and laughter that we shared then have kept us together, even if we do not share that much anymore on a daily basis.
Each one of us is so different and so cuckoo in our own ways.
Gee was the boisterous one in college who often intimated others in her 'Punju' aggressive manner. She wasn't too concerned about fashion or clothes or anything feminine. She was the life of our group though, with her mad laughter and mimicry. She was also prudish (but so were we all) and always wondered how she'd manage with the boys.
Mirch was the fat, insecure one who hid behind loose clothes and who hated being photographed. She was happy to merge into the foliage. She actually was the tree in one of our plays in college and I haven't seen anyone more happy to play that role.
Shwets was the studious one, and the sexy one, with her curly long locks and long legs. She also was the one to ace her Psychology papers. She was more keen on having many relationships rather than getting married to the first right person that came her way.
Fats was the sporty one who had the ability to bond with a stranger in record time and could get them to discuss the most private parts of their lives. She could sit with complete strangers and discuss the most personal, embarassing and uncomfortable issues with such ease. No wonder, she went on to be a counsellor. She has had some of the most arbit relationships with arbit people.
And then there was Me, the safe one. I loved observing and continue to do so...I could be part of the group yet be detached and guarded my personal space. I was the people's person so pretty much got along with most yet didn't know when and how to say No. I was constantly wanting to do the 'right' thing.
Cut to today, a decade later these very same people have changed so much
Gee is living in with her boyfriend and is more concerned about the way she looks and actually wears designer stuff! Thankfully, her mad laughter is still intact and never tires of repeating the same old stories over and over again. She is also into Crystal therapy and meditation and connecting with the spirit world! As whacko as it gets.
Mirch, from being the fat one in college, has now turned into the most svelte one in the group, with an amazing figure and an even more sassy attitude. She is doing stellar in her Sales job and turns down men like they don't exist. Payback time!
Shwets has done her Phd in Psychology and from wanting to have many relationships, she ended up marrying the first guy she had a serious relationship with.
Fats continues to bond with strangers but with a one year old in tow, doesn't get much time to get up, close and personal.
And I have learnt to tell people off and I know that grey zones exist in life and not everything is totally right or totally wrong.
Just as I write this, I got a mail from Gee.
Hey guys...went for a meditation yesterday - which was probably singularly the most special and personally rewarding meditation I have ever experienced - just wanted to say I LOVE YOU GUYS hugely!
I have had the most amount of fun with you guys...
The past few years have been HUGE for me - and every day has just been about getting self together - learning what I am here for - and understanding my own needs/desires/feelings/motivations a bit better.
Its really been a long break I have taken from giving of self outwardly to anyone - I have just sunk into my self and studied self from all angles - and I have to say it has been the most incredible journey I have ever undertaken - and what I have loved about you guys - is whether you understood or not - whether you believed in what I did or not - whether you agreed or not - you were always there - and that space that we share I treasure the most - so thanks for being who you are...
Today I feel whole - I know there are still going to be some great moments and some not so great moments - but even the latter will be understood in a totally different dimension.
I live for this day - I don’t truly know what I will believe or think or know tomorrow - but all I have is now - and I chose to live it with huge laughter and love...
I really find my laughter coming back to me now - and it feels so damn good - to just truly smile at nothing and laugh my head off at the simplest of things.
That if nothing else shows me I have healed a great deal - and am proud of it.
From my soul to yours - love laughter and joy!
A the risk of sounding kukoo...but I mean it fully - I will say this...
NAMASTE (I bow to the beauty of your soul)
So this is what the Ya-Ya Sisterhood is all about.