From highs to lows
From this morning's high of laptop giddines, et al, I am now completely in a trough.
I updated my resume, have sent it to friend D, and trolled some college websites for open positions. Jokingly, the way they write their job descriptions I'm not even qualified to be a cafeteria worker.
Seriously though, for many of the entry levelish staff positions I don't have the experience desired. I've wasted the last 10 years of my life (time from college graduation until now). I've been working for a medical billing company for the past 6 & 3/4 years now and all it's given me are stress knots in my neck & back that I've recently done a 4 week stint in physical therapy for & I'm still having problems with my back. In essence, I've been in a abusive relationship for that time, giving and giving and getting nothing in return. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of having no options & no hope. And I'm sick of being 34 & still living with my parents becuase they talked me out applying to private colleges when I was in high school because they thought they couldn't afford them (thanks to HS guidance counselors who were less than helpful and less than knowledgeable about scholarship options for those not in the top 5 of my graduating class of 240+). Then after I flunked a course at state satellite campus therefore losing what little aid I did get, we moved to TN. Then mom & talked decided I needed to go back to college. So I did. To a private, liberal arts college. I focused on my studies, took a work study job at the library, and held down a part-time job. What I should've done instead of graduate cum laude, was network. Apparently that's what gets you an interview at my alma mater. Last count, I have applied for 9 positions at that college & was never called for an interview, 6 times due to the position had already been filled... by someone who had kissed ass.
Flash forward to December 2004, got talked into applying where my mom works as I had taken a part-time job at the college bookstore & didn't have health insurance. What I did have at the end of a year & a half there was two movies I made on my camcorder. Not that they're Oscar worthy, but still. So I took the job. Six and 3/4 years later... you read the above. I'm a data entry peon who actually does a hell of a lot of mental gymnastics for my job- you try dealing with 24 different states and their medicaid programs and see how sane you are.
I guess it's better out than in and I know other people have life way more harder than I do. But I'm tired of it. I'm tired of no hope, no chance to break free.
I updated my resume, have sent it to friend D, and trolled some college websites for open positions. Jokingly, the way they write their job descriptions I'm not even qualified to be a cafeteria worker.
Seriously though, for many of the entry levelish staff positions I don't have the experience desired. I've wasted the last 10 years of my life (time from college graduation until now). I've been working for a medical billing company for the past 6 & 3/4 years now and all it's given me are stress knots in my neck & back that I've recently done a 4 week stint in physical therapy for & I'm still having problems with my back. In essence, I've been in a abusive relationship for that time, giving and giving and getting nothing in return. I'm sick of it. I'm sick of having no options & no hope. And I'm sick of being 34 & still living with my parents becuase they talked me out applying to private colleges when I was in high school because they thought they couldn't afford them (thanks to HS guidance counselors who were less than helpful and less than knowledgeable about scholarship options for those not in the top 5 of my graduating class of 240+). Then after I flunked a course at state satellite campus therefore losing what little aid I did get, we moved to TN. Then mom & talked decided I needed to go back to college. So I did. To a private, liberal arts college. I focused on my studies, took a work study job at the library, and held down a part-time job. What I should've done instead of graduate cum laude, was network. Apparently that's what gets you an interview at my alma mater. Last count, I have applied for 9 positions at that college & was never called for an interview, 6 times due to the position had already been filled... by someone who had kissed ass.
Flash forward to December 2004, got talked into applying where my mom works as I had taken a part-time job at the college bookstore & didn't have health insurance. What I did have at the end of a year & a half there was two movies I made on my camcorder. Not that they're Oscar worthy, but still. So I took the job. Six and 3/4 years later... you read the above. I'm a data entry peon who actually does a hell of a lot of mental gymnastics for my job- you try dealing with 24 different states and their medicaid programs and see how sane you are.
I guess it's better out than in and I know other people have life way more harder than I do. But I'm tired of it. I'm tired of no hope, no chance to break free.