Handcuffed: Chapter Seven
That singular moment of impact: Lassy's fingers tightening on his shoulders and feeling the wall suddenly against his back, and it's funny - because it shouldn't have been enough to knock the wind out of him, but in that moment Shawn Spencer is both dazed and breathless and so, so, so turned on. For that split second he can't think of anything at all, except a faint glimmer of hope that the impact of his body against the wall will soon be followed by the impact of Lassiter's body against his.
…but it isn't.
And so Shawn has to wrench his brain away, think think think! Mayonnaise. Barefoot Gus. The hairball Little Boy Cat left on the carpet. Dead people. Chad Michael Murray's cold untrustworthy eyes. Serial killers.
And then, just as quickly, another thought - a flash of memory breaking through, Juliet with her hands on her hips: …&and I've never in my life shoved someone against a wall unless I was trying to ask them to kiss me or trying to ask them to screw me, Carlton.
An out. Brilliant. And so Shawn smiles, and breathes "Which is it that you want, then," with what little breath he has left, and he thinks about raisins even though he's really hoping that Lassy will kiss him so hard they might just need to get naked on Juliet's futon.
But that's not what happens, because that's the moment when Lassy panics: lets Shawn go as quickly as if he were burnt, holds his palms up in the age-old symbol for surrender and Shawn tries to pretend a little part of his heart didn't just sink.
(At least he doesn't need to think about unsexy things any more.)
"Damnit, Spencer," Lassy swears, looking down, looking right, looking everywhere that isn't the direction Shawn is in. "Damnit, that's not what I…you know what, forget it. I think I can slip the lock, get us out of here. You…" he trails off into a nonsense angry syllable, then turns to look Shawn right in the eyes. "You're just like your damn mother."
Of all the things Shawn was expecting to hear, this was certainly not one of them. He raises both of his eyebrows, says "Excuse me?"
"Your mother, the shrink. You're just like her, it's like…one minute I'm being sensible, I'm being myself, I'm being Carlton…and then the next I'm just talking like someone slipped me sodium pentathol and I'm telling secrets I didn't even know I had." He pauses, and a strange look crosses his face. "You didn't, did you?"
Shawn rolls his eyes. "I didn't what, Lassypants? Slip you truth serum? Absolutely not, although if you had anything to eat or drink before I got here, maybe Jules did. …and before you even try to figure that out, I'm joking, obviously."
"Evidence obtained under the influence of that is not admissible," Lassy mutters, and Shawn tries hard to pretend that he doesn't find it adorable, but he's slipping. He's been slipping around Lassiter a lot, now more than ever, and he definitely thinks Jules was right about a lot of things.
You can lead a horse to water and watch him drown.
Shawn sighs, stretches both hands above his head, cracks his knuckles, searches for courage, finds it wanting, decides he doesn't care.
"You know, Lassyface," he says, slowly moving a bit closer to the other man. "I think there's a lot of validity to some of the things Juliet had to say. Maybe you don't, but I do. And -" he reaches out, grabs Lassiter by the shirt-front, and the other man is so shocked it's ridiculously easy to maneuver him. Shawn's hands are flat on Lassy's chest, and he reaches out, to shove him abruptly against the wall. "I'm probably going to get shot for this, but it'd so totally be worth it," he mutters under his breath.
Shawn's hands tremble, as he keeps Lassiter pinned to the wall, and he finds enough courage to raise one eyebrow, murmur "Like that thing she said about shoving people against walls? I totally agree with that one, Lassiter, so I suppose this means I'm asking."
(And for a moment, he feels like he's about to faint: the rushing of air in his ears and a heaviness in his hands and it's all he can do to just stay put, staring into Carlton Lassiter's blue blue eyes.)