Bleck
I feel lame. I think I really hate it when people compare me to someone they know, especially if I've met that person and didn't care for them too much. I really have the need to be me and not compared to anyone else, I dunno it's lame and I don't handle it well. I'm just really tired of hangin' around parties with the "too cool for school" types, all miserable and punk and without the slightest clue as to what fun should be. It makes me wonder if I was this stupid when I was their age? Don't get me wrong, they aren't all bad, I'm just older than all of it and tired of all of it. Frankly, they give me anxiety attacks and make me depressed because it's mostly true that it doesn't get much better than stupid after show parties and psuedo-rockstars......they breed apathy like they breed the sheep that live on their damn farms. Grrr, I need something new, something that doesn't get old the very first second I buy in. I think I need a cigarette.
I guess I only stick around cause their are people I care about that hang out in those places, one most of all, and that's why I put up with their shit and their rudeness. If I had to relflect I would say at it's very core, this is why I am unhappy. i need to break away from that. From here on out, I can't sit through another mindless evening chock full of people I hardly know or hardly care to know. You have no friends just like me, just a bunch of people that make you as sick as they make me. What are we ever going to do with ourselves?
I guess I only stick around cause their are people I care about that hang out in those places, one most of all, and that's why I put up with their shit and their rudeness. If I had to relflect I would say at it's very core, this is why I am unhappy. i need to break away from that. From here on out, I can't sit through another mindless evening chock full of people I hardly know or hardly care to know. You have no friends just like me, just a bunch of people that make you as sick as they make me. What are we ever going to do with ourselves?