(no subject)
well, i am here at work on this the day before our great nation received its independence and thus was given the freedom to terrorize its own citizens, rather than having the british do it for them. considering the circumstances, i have nothing to do except take frequent smoke breaks, watch the clock, and post uninteresting blogs such as this one. apparently i'm told that jerry should have given us the day off (he has done so in the past) but it must have just slipped his mind. though i'm being paid hourly, i'm going to leave early today because they haven't gotten around to giving me any tangible documentation to sign off for when i'm here and when i'm gone. i made 87 vegan peanut butter chocolate chip cookies last week. i took some to work, took some to austin (discussed later), and left some at home. to give you all a small idea of just how many cookies that is: if you placed each cookie end to end on the ground the line would be 21.75 feet long (assuming that each cookie was, on average, about 3 inches long). assuming that an average human being is roughly five and a half feet tall, that's 4 humans! that's a lot of cookies.
so, connie slept with an upperclassman or something and now knows our room assignment for next year which is pretty sweet. the room's proximity to the bathroom and what i can only assume is a balcony of some sort makes it a very suitable location. plus, it's farther away from the kitchen, which has its advantages as well. they go thus: the kitchen is usually the place where people cook things (at least that's what i use it for). food has been known to contain units called calories. by having to walk a longer distance than most people to get to the kitchen from our room, connie and i will be losing more calories. assuming that everyone in our dorm uses the kitchen exclusively, eats the same things, and engages in the same general behavior, connie and i will be slightly smaller than most people. i won't delve into the advantages of jogging to and from the kitchen because i think they are rather obvious.
just this past weekend, i went down to austin with my mother and sister to go apartment hunting for said mother. it was a very fun trip, although i didn't get to see as much of lauren as i would have liked to, due to the fact that she took on a second job because she's a crazy motherfucker and she worked for 16 hours on saturday.
okay, i'm honestly about to take a nap on the floor of my cubicle. it will probably be uncomfortable, but hey, i'm getting paid about 12 bucks to do it so i'm not complaining.
so, connie slept with an upperclassman or something and now knows our room assignment for next year which is pretty sweet. the room's proximity to the bathroom and what i can only assume is a balcony of some sort makes it a very suitable location. plus, it's farther away from the kitchen, which has its advantages as well. they go thus: the kitchen is usually the place where people cook things (at least that's what i use it for). food has been known to contain units called calories. by having to walk a longer distance than most people to get to the kitchen from our room, connie and i will be losing more calories. assuming that everyone in our dorm uses the kitchen exclusively, eats the same things, and engages in the same general behavior, connie and i will be slightly smaller than most people. i won't delve into the advantages of jogging to and from the kitchen because i think they are rather obvious.
just this past weekend, i went down to austin with my mother and sister to go apartment hunting for said mother. it was a very fun trip, although i didn't get to see as much of lauren as i would have liked to, due to the fact that she took on a second job because she's a crazy motherfucker and she worked for 16 hours on saturday.
okay, i'm honestly about to take a nap on the floor of my cubicle. it will probably be uncomfortable, but hey, i'm getting paid about 12 bucks to do it so i'm not complaining.