OotP Chapter Twenty-Eight
*OMG it’s Snape’s worzt memory!!11
*The Hogwarts rumor mill comes through again, passing around only information needed for the plot-go rumor mill! (And we know this rumor’s a good one because everybody’s coming to Harry for the accurate story…though I’m not sure exactly what that accurate story was for non-DA members)
*Hermione on Umbridge, viciously: "Oh, I expect she really fancied herself sitting up there in the Head’s office, lording it over the other teachers, the stupid, puffed-up, power-crazy old..." We’re all seeing that Umbridge totally=Hermione, right? I mean, Hermione’s not stupid or old, and she knows to stand behind the chair rather than sit in it (the man sits in the chair), but actually that's what Umbridge is doing anyway. She's doing it all for Fudge, remember?
*Draco’s now sliding out from behind things-cause he’s like a snake.
*I’m not even going to try to figure out just who can usually dock points and who can’t-is it only teachers, or can prefects not dock other prefects? I think we get the jist-Malfoy’s been given more power by Umbridge and this is a really bad thing.
*The point-taking scene was like an oasis to me the first time I read the book. Draco cracks me up in it, having so much fun being all lightly irritating, grrrr!
*Ironically, he’s still falling far short of Hermione’s dire warnings of all the stuff he was supposed to be doing to Harry as Prefect. The total sum of his damage here seems to be (gets out calculator), he takes away 30 points, 5 from Hufflepuff and 25 from Gryffindor, and makes me laugh (your shirt’s untucked, I don’t like you, forgot about that, etc.) before walking away and leaving them alone.
*Btw, shirt's untucked? Shouldn't he be in a robe? Extra points for wearing Muggle clothes, Ron!
*Wait, 25 points from Gryffindor?! Why, he’s completely erased those 20 points Harry worked so hard to earn by passing Sprout that watering can!
*Ernie feels this completely undermines the prefect system, letting Malfoy dock points. As opposed to Dumbledore handing out points after the whole competition’s over to make sure Gryffindor wins. Sadly, it still doesn’t occur to any student that we see that the house cup contest is meaningless and dumb.
*Gryffindor and Ravenclaw were neck and neck for lead before Slytherin gains power to make the little beans move absolute power. Ravenclaw’s probably going to be really pissed off the IS for taking away Gryffindor’s points.
*The twins have taken care of Montague first thing. Once I remember coming across a comment in response to this incident referring to "bullies like Montague," indicating that, as usual, only the necessary measures were taken here against a Slytherin in self-defense. In fact Montague merely tried to take points from the twins for something and before he gets the words out they shoved him into the cabinet that causes longterm damage.
*Hermione is shocked! Shocked, I tell you! Not because everyone already knows that Montague could be lost inside the cabinet "for weeks," which makes this sound like a really horrible thing to do, but because they could get in trouble.
*The twins have decided they "don’t care about getting in trouble anymore." They have not made the decision that they don’t care about hurting anybody they choose, because they made that decision years ago.
*As slinkhard pointed out, there could be something to be said here for the idea that Umbridge appeals to those people who are treated badly under Dumbledore’s regime, but instead we’re to see Filch as having been rightfully restrained under Dumbledore, and now given free reign to torture students that Dumbledore likes.
*Still, there's a real connection between Filch and the twins. Both of them, have merely discarded the superficial things that held them in check because they wanted to stay at Hogwarts. They’re not pushed into anything by this situation, they’re just freed to be themselves more.
*I’d hope this all indicated that hey, laws are good. Unfortunately it may just be indicating that Dumbledore is good and if you don’t adore him you deserve whatever comes down on your head in punishment.
*Harry thinks Umbridge went to great lengths to get Filch on her side, though something tells me it really wouldn’t take great lengths. Not treating him like scum and laughing at his being a squib would probably go a long way.
*snort* Sorry, but those brooms chained to the wall is just hysterical. It’s like if your mom took away your teddy for punishment and placed him in a tiny stocks. I’m surprised the bristles weren’t wilting, to indicate the broom had lost its will to live.
*Umbridge looks like a toad, apparently.
*Harry’s quite smart to figure out there might be something in the tea Umbridge gives him. After all, Umbridge was so subtle about shoving it down his throat.
*OMG, Malfoy gets to read everybody’s mail? He must be wetting himself with joy. Too bad Harry doesn’t get any, Hermione’s letters home are probably form letters, and Molly already puts sensitive family information in Howlers.
*So, Hermione’s becoming rebellious, the moment in each book where you know she’s super cool.
*Earlier, when Hermione was watching their disappearing hats I wasn’t sure if her trying to figure out how they did it was a)jealousy, b)admiration or c)just something for her to say so Harry could interrupt and say he was tired. But it would go right along with Hermione’s personality if she has become enamored of the efficient tactics of people she allegedly disapproves of, and so decided that if they get the results she wants they were okay all along. Since she's struggling between her desire to be the teacher’s pet who enforces rules and thus gains praise and power, and her desire to smite her enemies and make the world a better place and thus get even more praise and power. It starts to seem like this all was to lead up to giving Hermione justification for throwing out the very few limits on her own behavior she already has.
*ETA: Yeah, that interesting Hermione vs. Twins dynamic pretty much went nowhere. As did the Twins' entire business and arsenal of weapons. We've got camping to do!
*The fact that Umbridge being headmistress also makes Hermione actually suggest a night off from studying. That's an odd rebellion. Nobody made her study to begin with. Nothing is worth it without the authority figure!
*It always seems odd to me when people talk about how the whole Umbridge regime is so Orwellian. As far as I can see the woman has no power at all save for a few isolated incidents where she manages to punish somebody we like. It’s not like she becomes headmistress and everyone’s enslaved. On the contrary, she becomes headmistress and everyone goes crazy. The Inquisitor Squad takes its greatest hit before the kids even know Umbridge is Headmistress.
*ETA: One might want to compare this reaction to the totally docile response of the entire Wizarding World a couple of books from now.
*In fact, all the characters are freed of constraints. The Gryffindors blow things up and injure people, Filch threatens torture and the Slytherins insult and annoy people and thumb their nose at the house point system (and get attacked).
*Voldemort, for the moment, fares much better, since as Harry tells us he hasn’t practiced Occlumency once. Even when Harry goes to sleep happy he’s zooming into the DoM and not closing his mind. In fact he’s angry at his housemates for keeping him out of the room. I’ll say it: I like villainous!Harry sitting in his bed brooding over not getting what he wants to rule the world while his housemates watch fireworks.
*Once again, when Harry tries to do something responsible for himself by practicing his Occlumency, and thus become strong and independent, it’s Hermione who interrupts his meditation.
*For some reason Harry doesn’t just tell Hermione what he’s really doing, but you know, I think even if he did Hermione would have kept bugging him because she couldn’t stand not feeling her help was essential or not telling him he was doing it wrong.
*Small consolation that Marietta’s still in the hospital wing. But it is some consolation. Any pain or discomfort she might be feeling helps.
*My goodness, I’ve been completely not giving Cho credit. She actually is the one person in the DA bright enough to figure out it was a horrible trick of Hermione Granger's to curse the parchment. Not that Harry’s cares about Marietta as a person or could think of it from that pov.
*Love Harry’s defense that Ron’s dad works for the Ministry and that makes him just like Marietta. Um, Harry? Ron's dad works for Dumbledore. That'd be like Nott saying, "Well, Malfoy's dad works at the Ministry and he doesn't mind helping Voldemort out. Jeez, what's your problem?"
*Sadly, I wonder if Cho is supposed to be an example of a bad person here by saying Marietta is a lovely person who made a mistake after Marietta OMG BETRAYED HER!! >:-ooo Sounds a bit Slinkhard-like, you know, like Cho’s just too spineless to know that Marietta should be judged and shunned forever. I really hope we’re not supposed to be dismissing Cho here as untrustworthy because when you understand where someone else is coming from, even someone who hurt you, the terrorists win. The Gryffindor judgment and anger just doesn’t seem like the sword of truth and righteousness they seem to think it is.
*Harry’s really an idiot warning Cho not to start crying again. Because it’s important for him to constantly tell himself that Cho has never had any valid reason for crying. Why, she might as well be crying now when she’s being "fierce" and yelling at him. I wish Cho had brought up that "darling Hermione’s" idea with the list had also gotten all their names taken.
*Honestly, Harry really shows his true colors to Cho here. He basically tells her that he considers her crying something he has to "cope with" and it irritates him, naturally during the first conversation where Cho makes the mistake of trying to talk about something from her own pov, or make Harry understand her. (You’d think Harry would be more comfortable with her when she’s showing fury, an emotion he likes, but since it’s fury on the part of something that requires Harry to think unemotionally for a minute she’s pretty much screwed.) If she’d just stuck to telling him how great he was all the time she’d have been the perfect girlfriend. But since she’s not it’s great of Harry to tell her how little he respects her grief over her boyfriend. He barely knows her, but is able to use the little he does know against her. I kind of hope Cho has a good part in the next book. She’s just become a favorite character.
*ETA: Poor Cho. She got sent away to a reeducation camp to come back as a Harry fangirl.
*ETA: I hope everyone's seeing how great Ginny is in this scene, the way she doesn't bother Harry with grief when her brother dies or want any say in naming her stupid children at all.
*Ah, my other favorite scene in the book, and in the same chapter. Malfoy bangs into Snape’s office. This does probably indicate that they have a personal relationship, because while Malfoy seems like he probably bangs into rooms a lot I don’t imagine he did it with Snape until he knew it was okay. But we’re also told that Draco "sped in" which I think could indicate just that this really is an emergency, that they’ve just found somebody hurt. Anyway, Draco says sorry to Snape for barging in, which is polite (and luckily Harry doesn’t tell us he doesn’t "sound sorry at all"). He’s also pretty efficient at coming in, giving his message, and leaving, with the minimum gaping at Harry.
*ETA: Nope, no real personal relationship, at least on Snape's part. He only cares about Lily. No redemption possible here for these two. It's kind of sad to think that the Malfoys are pretty much the only people who might have mourned Snape but he didn't actually value them much at all.
*Malfoy also looks gleeful at the idea of Harry in remedial potions, and Harry would like to either shout the truth at him (bad idea--I'm surprised Harry didn't do it) or "even better, to hit him with a good curse." Because Draco exists.
*ETA: Harry will sure show him next year when he's the star Potions student. Surprisingly, he will have no desire to shout the truth at Malfoy then.
*Snape calls Draco and Draco calls Snape "sir." Awww. ETA: I take back my "awwww."
*Hmm, seems somebody’s been looking for Montague-the Slytherins? It’s one of those rare moments that reminds you that something and someone who means nothing to "our" students is missed by others. ETA: Setting up the cabinets in the next book--having little thematic meaning at all, imo.
*Once again Harry is sure that everyone will know he’s in remedial Potions and know he’s stupid. Zach’s reaction is almost exactly the same as Draco’s, looking pleased and repeating remedial Potions? in italics. Yet Draco didn’t hear about it until now, and despite being a bit of a pariah (who’s also a popular kid), Draco appears know gossip at school. So are we to assume that neither boy actually told everyone (since afaik we never get to hear about that awful day when everyone’s laughing at Harry for his bad grade in Potions and God knows if Harry’s being oppressed by something we usually hear about it), or are we supposed to assume both times that the boys did tell and JKR just wanted to use it twice so it could be freshly galling to Harry both times? It's also been suggested Snape might have asked Draco not to say anything about it, which he might have, since it might just be easier for him too to have the lessons secret, despite the amusement at everyone thinking Harry's stupid.
*I like the way when he's tempted to look at Snape's memories Harry knows to tell himself he’s hoping to find out something about the DoM in the Pensieve as opposed to just wanting to know anything Snape would hide from him.
*It’s not like it occurs to him to wonder if him seeing these things, if they are connected to his "problem," could jeopardize anything for the Order. Wasn’t it just a few chapters ago Harry was worried Voldemort could see Order secrets through his head?
*Harry seems to know for sure Montague will have to go to the hospital wing. Not that I’d expect he’d worry about Montague’s well being himself, or hope the twins hadn’t seriously hurt him. It's just weird Harry thinks about it just enough to think that the more seriously hurt Montague is, the better for his plans.
*Just to be clear, the thing that makes Harry invade Snape’s thoughts is the thought of Cho’s anger and Malfoy’s face. Iow, people have pissed him off, so he deserves to invade Snape’s memories. If Snape wouldn’t like it, all the better. Having seen that the memory is in the Great Hall, he knows it’s not about his dreams.
*I just noticed that Snape was apparently interested in DADA even in high school, since he’s written a foot more than anyone else in small, cramped writing. Unless he’s just like Hermione and overdoes everything, but I don’t know...it seems like he has a passion for schoolwork, possibly DADA especially. ETA: It seems like I should have an ETA here, but I don't.
*Looking at James for Harry is like looking at himself but with deliberate mistakes. Damn, I love that description.
*LOL-Sirius is leaning back in his chair, the official pose of young rebellion. And he’s good-looking, not that that girl staring at him will have a chance with him at all, because he's too busy "rebelling" to have a girlfriend. Errr, yeah. Look but don’t touch, ladies. Rebels don't actually have sex. ETA: But they do plaster naked Muggle pictures to their walls to show how totally straight they are.
*Erm, do boys really doodle girls initials? It seems like such a girl thing to do. I know they’ve been known to carve them in trees, but doodling them makes me think James should be writing, "Mr. Lily Evans. Mr. James Evans-Potter. Mr. James Potter-Evans" and then writing out the list of who his bridesmaids will be. And James is truly pining for her for two years? Jeez. ETA: Wizards one inborn talent: pining forever.
*Hee. I love teen!Snape.
*Even in the 70s, there were groups of chattering girls, probably all idiots.
*Hmm. James is the one mouthing off about Lupin where people could hear. One would think it would be Sirius, somehow.
*I like the way Harry’s just sure he couldn’t follow James if Snape went too far away from him. Cause this is Snape’s memory and it just seems like it should be that way. Just go with Harry on this, kay?
*James and Sirius really are insufferable. So easy blah blah, so smart, blah blah, nicked the Snitch. Sirius is "haughty and bored, but handsomely so." How very Malfoy (specifically Draco Malfoy)-like, if not for the handsome. Second time I’ve made that connection in this book.
*Harry says Snape seems to have no clear idea where he’s going when he leaves the school, which might put to rest those ideas that Snape deserved what he’s about to get because he was following them to try something himself. Unless, of course, Snape’s absorption in his exam paper is all an elaborate ruse so that he can do something evil. Except that he’s, you know, walking away when they jump him.
*Still, I’d also love to see what Harry would look like to an objective observer. Instead of looking at the girls and mussing his hair, he’d be glaring around at everyone and snapping at anyone who came close on bended knee.
*Despite what jerks MWPP are, they are totally cooler than the Trio. Can you imagine Harry’s son in this situation: "Uncle Ron was always the same. Damn, my dad was a little piss ant. And look, Aunt Hermione was always 48. Guess they were the losers of the class..."
*Too bad Harry doesn’t care about fashion enough to play up the clothing and hair angle.
*Err, I’m with Harry here at Wormtail gasping and applauding. I’m sorry...gasping and applauding? Looking impressed, sure, but he’s a fifteen-year-old boy. Applauding? Isn’t that a bit much even for a sychophant?
*When Lupin says, "You might" in response to Sirius wishing it was a full moon, is that the English equivalent of saying, "You would?" Like, is Lupin commenting on the fact that Sirius is saying something pretty insensitive about his being a werewolf? Or is he just saying, "You might…if you’re bored, you might test me on Transfig."
*I know we’re always hearing how Sirius and James were the smartest, but frankly Lupin still seems the most intelligent of the four.
*Err, Sirius and James actually do remind me of the twins here, a bit, the way they adopt that British sort of, "Well, Mr. Potter, shall we pants him?" "After you, Mr. Black."
*I’m kind of loving James, the way even when he’s bullying someone he’s looking at the girls. I think if James had lived longer, far from having his heart won by Lily the wonderful, he would have cheated on her any chance he got.
*Sirius speaks viciously too, like Hermione.
*Snape says, "You wait...you wait." *checks ahead to the end* Yup, that’s what Draco tells Harry. And Snape’s choked here, much like Dudley. ETA: Ah, so sad the way my younger self looked for something in Slytherin.
*Bwahahaha! When Lily shows up James' free hand instinctively goes to his hair. Man, this guy would have been so much more likable if he’d lived as sort of a jerk instead of canonized. In fact, maybe he already was cheating on Lily.
*People often agree that James is OMG IS PICKING ON SNAPE JUST BECAUSE HE EXISTS! Duh, he’s not picking on him because he exists but because he fulfills certain criteria James thinks is bad-and they have a history that James doesn’t feel like explaining at that moment. He’s trying to give a cool answer and insult Snape.
*I know it’s often considered significant that Snape draws blood with his curse (so it’s obviously Dark Magic) while James just knocks over and chokes Snape with his (counter-hexes all), but given the position Snape’s in I can see why he’s more vicious. I’d feel completely terrorized and alone. ETA: Sectumsempra--kind of is the most badass curse ever.
*Nice that James makes it clear right up front that this is all part of his elaborate mating dance with Lily, and that’s true from Lily’s side as well. Her face is already twitching into a smile when she sees Snape’s underwear, before he calls her a name. This is partially why her superior, "I won’t bother in future, wash your pants, Snivellus" strikes me as so eye-rolling. Of course her desire to help assumed Snape being grateful (if she remembered him at all), and she would never consider herself to have made the situation worse for Snape.
*ETA: Okay, coming at that scene now from post-DH, it's funny that after HBP I liked Lily more because I thought yeah, they must have been friends and that's why Lily's shocked at what he says. But now that we've seen their friendship--yuck.
*...and better for James, who can now rip open his shirt to reveal the red S and defend Lily’s honor. I mean, it’s all fun and games until somebody uses the "M" word. It’s almost as if Snape takes this more seriously than they do, and is miserable.
*Okay, Lily’s big speech to James about what a jerk he is? We all get that it reveals she’s got a crush on him, right? Just checking. Speeches of this type have been bringing Draco or Harry together in H/D fics for years.
*And James takes his annoyance at that speech out on Snape, all unbeknownst that his son is watching for a similar reason-a girl made him angry too, so he’s making himself feel better!
*I love that Harry turns around and sees a "fully grown, adult-sized Snape." Yeah, you’re in trouble now. Hey Harry, do you get why he likes picking on you and hates you yet?
*You know, I was recently reading something about Snape’s inappropriate reaction to Harry and the way he doesn’t recognize that Harry is clearly sorry and not amused at what evil!James was doing because he’s nothing like his father, not at all. But the thing is, while Snape's reaction is totally irrational and scary, Harry actually did go into the Pensieve out of spite (even if it wasn’t directed at Snape at that moment) and to entertain himself with a treat. He’s just had time to calm down because he’s been distracted by seeing his parents and everything. So Snape actually isn’t wrong when he says Harry’s been amusing himself in the Pensieve, he’s just wrong about exactly what Harry found entertaining.
*ETA: Snape hates Harry for being "like his father" but he's got his mother's worst qualities too. "I'm totally compassionate and caring about everybody while being a jerk!"
*You know, just because Harry knows how it feels to be humiliated in front of others doesn’t mean he’s an official victim as opposed to an aggressor. Most people know what it’s like to feel humiliated in front of others. It’s very hard to get through your whole life without ever feeling that way. If Malfoy were watching this scene, he’d be identifying with Snape too. Hell, SNAPE would be identifying with Snape in this scene and he loves humiliating people in front of the class. It’s not always a sign of a kind person that they see themselves as the innocent party. (Just observe some very angry fans of Harry who hate Draco so much they sound exactly like him.)
*Damn, it’s not until the very beginning of the next chapter that Harry starts explaining how if he or the twins did something like this, they’d be sure to do it to the right person, someone they really loathed, unlike James who didn't loathe Snape at all and didn't think he deserved this. But it’s coming. Oh, it’s coming. Just give him a second to make his escape.
Box Picture
I consider this a box picture chapter, because this is where the younger generation of stars can be stunt cast as Young!Marauders. ETA: That is, if the movies cared about this backstory at all.
Designated Hero
Harry does just about nothing remotely admirable in this chapter, and he gets extra points for his treatment of Cho: Listen bitch, I’ve had to put up with your meaningless snivelling too much already. Stop thinking you and I can have a conversation.
Idiot World
Umbridge, like most villains here, is completely ineffective-her attempt to feed Harry Veritaseum is embarassing. Yet she's still hated a lot.
Misdirected Answering
You know, having the characters even bring up the idea that Prefects can or can’t take points just complicated things.
The Stealth Monster Rule
Why, grown-up, adult Snape! Where did you come from?!
Final score: 5