04 HP Chamber of Secrets
Ch4 At Flourish and Blotts
>I’m not a neat freak, but life at Burrow sounds like a nightmare.
>Why do Weasleys keep the ghoul? It’s noisy and doesn’t seem to be some kind of pet. I would understand it, if the family lacked resources/money/time to deal with the pest, but in DH this thing is still there!
>What are ghouls in Potterverse? Are they undead or djins? Perhaps something completely different?
>Weasley parenting style: suspicious explosions coming from bedroom of our mean-spirited sons? Ignore it!
>The way Weasley parents act around Harry is downright creepy.
>Yes Arthur, it’s fascinating that those poor muggles managed to come up with less convoluted ways of dealing with their problems, than people who have power to break laws of universe.
>At this point Ginny’s crush is still kind of cute and awkward. I swear, until we met sassy OotP Ginny and heard what Ginny thinks about Harry in HBP, I had nothing against this character.
>Harry not being interested in Ginny at this point feels natural, but if Jo wanted them to end up together so badly, she should start working on their relationship in either this book or the next one.
>Why I am not surprised that Albus already knows Harry is mooching off Weasleys.
>I like to think that Albus made a deal with Gilderoy: in exchange for being paid in peanuts for his work at Hogwarts, Lockhart can shamelessly extort students and promote his books.
>What is with wizards and alliteration? At first things like Godrick Gryffindor and Rowena Ravenclaw were cute but titles of Lockhart’s books are way overboard. “Travels with Trolls”? “Break with a Banshee”?
>Damn, narrative sounds passive-aggressive about Percy being prepared for the day before he eats breakfast. What, did Jo woke up on the wrong side of bed that day?
>I hope that Percy is wearing shirt under his sweater vest.
>Poor Errol, not only he is forced to work when he is clearly in no condition to do so, but now people are trying to sit on him. Instead of trying to forcefully free House Elves, Hermione should start campaign against animal abuse. +1 to Crime Count
>Kids at Hogwarts are learning how to break laws of universe, yet here Ron is horrified that anyone could bother with schoolwork during holidays. Only Rowling could make learning magic sound tedious.
>So it has been about week from Harry’s rescue and they are getting letter from Hermione now. She probably spend last week being anxious about what was happening to her friend and about what Ron might do to get to Harry. And wizarding way of life is somehow superior?
>On additional note: after getting Hermione’s letter, boys do not bother sending reply via Hedwig. With friends like these, I see ulcers in Hermione’s future.
>Alert! Alert! Continuity failure spotted: Harry claims that he never met Charlie but knew that he is in Romania. While in PS Harry never talked with Charlie, he certainly met him.
>Why Weasleys need 5 sets of books? If kids had to take them to classroom you need only 4 sets: Percy, Ginny, Ron and twins. If not you could easily get away with one or two sets of books. +1 to Leap of Logic
>Our eternally suffering hero angsts over having pile of gold, yet he doesn’t decide to, let’s say propose sharing set of Lockhart books with Ron? Harry could buy three or four and Ron could buy the rest. It’s not like either of them plan to read them.
>During breakfast each person ate six bacon sandwiches... How the hell wizards can move in any other fashion than rolling? That has to be around 2000 calories!
>In the last chapter Molly knew that something was wrong with Harry’s home situation since he wasn’t responding to Ron’s letters and one of her sons told her that Harry’s family was starving Harry. In this chapter Molly frets about having to tell Harry’s relatives that Weasley’s lost their nephew. It’s like in between chapters somebody erased some memories from her brain.
>How Harry is supposed to walk out of the right fireplace, if he is also supposed to keep his eyes closed?
>Why Harry cannot simply specify address? Instead of “Diagon Alley” say “Leaky Caldron”? I smell authorial shenanigans… +1 to Leap of Logic
>”He fell, face forward, onto cold stone and felt the bridge of his glasses snap.” I see Jo never had even seen a pair of broken glasses.
>Soooo Harry managed to Floo into empty shop just like that, you say? Somewhere out there, there is a muggleborn who just started to plan their future career as Phantom Thief.
>Harry landed in the same shop that bankrupted directors of B horror movies shop for movie props.
>*Snickers* After fussing that he can’t be seen by his rival in such bad shape, Harry hides in closet to observe Draco. +1 FWBP
>Aww; Draco also is thinking about Harry. Heck, what he says matches almost exactly what I said during PS commentary. +1 FWBP
>For all Draco’s whining he doesn’t sound like spoiled brat. I do however recall certain kid being offended over his abusive relatives daring to not celebrate his birthday
>I must admit Lucius’ approach here is awkward. From the start he approaches Borgin from lower negotiation position by admitting that Ministry is sniffing around his mansion. That is not what a sly person would do when dealing with a salesman.
>Ouch, Draco had to really get on Lucius’ bad side. An aristocrat admonishing his son in presence of salesman? That would be embarrassing for both son AND father. Not to mention it once again lowers Lucius’ negotiation position.
>Knockturn Alley sounds like something middle class middle-aged woman would come up with when thinking about Black Market.
>I was confused as to what Jo meant by “flesh eating slug repellent” so I decided to borrow my sister’s translated version. I assume the guy who was translating this book also was confused, because he side-stepped the whole issue by using (and here is loose translation) “effective product for slugs”. Well, I suppose that it certainly is one way of dealing with problems.
>Hagrid is angry at Durslays yet not at Dobby who engineered the whole situation...
>Word “galloping” to describe Molly combined with swinging handbag and dragging Ginny is interesting choice on Rowling’s part.
>+1 to the Spell Count for Arthur
>”So you don’t think I’m a match for Lucius Malfoy?” Nope, you are not. You are relatively low ranking ministry official, who either cannot manage his finances or is paid in peanuts and who has no friends in high places. Lucius on the other hand is rich aristocrat who knows ins and outs of the Ministry. Trying to go after him without smart plan is bound to end in catastrophe and it would if it wasn’t for Plot Armour. +1 to Leap of Logic
>In ranking of sheer dread, dentist are just after tax collectors, yet here they are treated like harmless kittens. If anyone was doubting Rowlings anti-establishment attitude, here you have proof.
>Oh gods, I’m not in the room with Arthur and I’m getting “Psycho Killer” vibe from his conversation with Grangers.
>Ah, I see that Jo decided to ramp up the Weasleys-are-very-poor theme so Harry can feel worse about his fortune. Strange that he doesn’t think that he should buy some kind of gift for Ron’s parents for their hospitality. Nor he feels bad for eating his way through their food supply during his stay
>Ok, I have to ask: how Harry got to his vault? In PS goblins were making fuss over showing vault key to get to the vault. Normally I wouldn’t make issue of that, but the last time we saw the key, it was handled by Hagrid with no mention of it being given to Harry.
>I see that WW has no laws against selling fireworks to minors. +1 to Crime Count
>Bah, for all Ron’s mocking, “Prefects Who Gained Power” seems like a book he should be interested in, after all in the last book the mirror showed us that he could be quite ambitious.
>I never understood why Molly dragged her whole family for school shopping. Most of the things on the list could be bought quicker and more efficient by one organised person. Wand and clothes could be bought at later date, when there are less people in the Alley.
>That book sale reminds me of 50 Shades of Grey sale I once stumbled upon. The Horrors.
>IMHO the most interesting characters are “writer” characters. They can tell you so much about the author. As such I find it bizarre when both narrative and male characters scoff at female characters fangirling over Lockhart. It’s like Rowling never had favourite author whom she admired not because of their looks, but because of their skill as author.
>No seriously, Rowling treats all “writer” type characters in very peculiar way. We have a fraud/plagiarist (Lockhart), a slanderer (Rita), insane cryptoids fans (Lovegoods), and old lady whose corpse was turned into snake fleshlight. Are you trying to say something Jo?
>Question to you guys: What is your favourite “writer” type character?
>Either Harry is attracted to males or he has very serve case of ADHD. No normal straight male notices so many details about other males. +1 FWBP
>In alternative universe, upon being grabbed by Lockhart the more trollish Harry starts to accuse Lockhart of being paedophile.
>Damn, Lockhart knows his stuff when it comes to PR. Harry definitely should take pointers from him. Heck, with little luck he might avoid half of GoF/OotP drama if he listened.
>”’You have these’[...]’I’ll buy my own-‘” Meanwhile in mirror world where Harry is not faux charitable guy he discovers joys of handsome possibly possessed magical objects much earlier. +1 to FBWP
>I must admit, I always wondered why Arthur takes part in raids. If anything he should be called when Aurors find something suspicious.
>Once again Lucius is written to be sly character by author who wouldn’t know sly, if it snaked behind her and stabbed her. There are so many ways to plant the Diary on one of Weasley children yet Lucius picks one of the most obvious.
>Now that I think about it, Percy would be much better target for both Lucius and Tom.
>Still, Lucius in this book is way more cunning than Voldie at any point of the series.
>I hope this fight ends up in Prophet!
>”Yeh should’ve ignored him, Arthur,’” said the man who would be the first to join brawl, if Lucius was badmouthing Dumbledore.
>Also Hagrid once again talks about bad blood. Considering his heritage, he probably should stay silent.
>Poor Grangers. First they had to suffer PsychoKiller!Arthur, now this brawl over few childish insults. Although they probably should get used to this, after all in a few more years of brainwashing their own daughter will go full Men in Black on them.
Crime Count: 2
Death Count: 0
Freud Would Be Proud: 4
Leap of Logic: 3
Uncovered: 0
Spell Count: Arthur:1