Codswallop and tomfoolery

[deaths_heritor]

[phone, morning]
If they aren't back by the end of the month, I'll eat my poker.  What trollop.

And please, if you're wrought with utter despair and you absolutely must subject the rest of us to incessant blather about how wonderful Disappeared Whom and Whom was and how unworthy you are to still exist, etc., ad nauseam, try to space it out evenly so

Comments

House

[likescats]

[In the house. Visiting/checking up on you.]

GRANDDAUGHTER.

[deaths_heritor]

Oh, Grandfather!

[And there's actually a tone of relief in her voice. First time ever.]

Do you mind fending off the children for a moment or two? They're driving me quite mad.

[likescats]

[That is new.]

I CAN IF YOU'D LIKE. HOW ARE THEY?

[deaths_heritor]

Do you remember the zombie invasion?

It's a bit like that. Not the 'braaaaiiiins' bit, but the part in between where, in the middle of a conversation, the most alarming statement is made as if it ought to pass unremarked upon. There's something just a bit disturbing about someone with such a familiar personality that's just got one thing wrong.

[likescats]

[He nods.]

I'LL KEEP AN EYE ON THEM.

[deaths_heritor]

Thank you.

I'd rather not have to trap them in the closet if I can help it, but I suppose I should get some rope anyway.

[likescats]

I'M SURE THAT WON'T BE NECESSARY.

[deaths_heritor]

It's something of a family tradition.

[Susan reaches into the topmost drawer in the kitchen cabinet and retrieves the rope.]

I've learned it's best to keep it handy.

...Everything going well with your household, Grandfather?

[likescats]

YES. SO FAR.

[deaths_heritor]

Not expecting something to go wrong?

[likescats]

YOU CAN ALWAYS EXPECT SOMETHING TO GO WRONG HERE.

[deaths_heritor]

No doubt they'll replace you with an anatomical model next. I suppose I should be prepared.

[likescats]

IT WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO MOVE THAT WELL.

[deaths_heritor]

I'll stand behind it and wheel it about to complete the illusion. No one will ever have to know.

[likescats]

YOU'D HAVE TO TEACH BOTH OF OUR CLASSES.