A Point for Mr. Teatime

[deaths_heritor]

Well, that was invigorating.

Children, I hope you remembered those papers on the irony inherent in the title of Sense and Sensibility.  Literary analysis waits for no man.  Pokey Minch, Kaguya Houraisan, and other interested parties, report to me tomorrow if you'd like to take that long overdue exam for placing out of class.

[filtered to teachers and

Comments

[ergaleomancer]

...You have a copy of Sense and Sensibility? And others as well? I assume you are a schoolteacher?

[Theta has no connections to the school and is oblivious to its recent goings on.]

[deaths_heritor]

It's a part of the curriculum for English Literature this year, yes. We haven't gotten far.

[Mostly because Susan feels the characters could all do with a good deal of shaking until they start living up to their title.]

[ergaleomancer]

I don't know if you know the state of the library...most adults are blocked out of having decent literature. While I can recite enough Shakespeare and Chaucer to stave off full intellectual atrophy...

...What will it take to get a spare copy of each novel you have for your students? ...I could build you a clockwork? Custom. To any whim.

[deaths_heritor]

Certainly, if you'd like. There's no need for payment. Though I should warn you that I chose one of the least offensive of the novels to start with -- The majority of the rest are insipid tripe in the vein of the sort of thing you'd expect the town to endorse.

[rogue_crow]

Now just what have you been up to, my dear Susan?

[deaths_heritor]

Jogging, my dear Zevran. Nothing like aerobic activity to restore the nerves.

[Susan has probably never jogged in her life.]

[rogue_crow]

Hmm...I think I may actually be insulted that you expect me to buy that.

[deaths_heritor]

Ideally, you were supposed to understand that it wasn't any of your business, nod, say, "Of course, Susan, I enjoy a brisk morning workout myself", and we would continue on.

[updollsdresses]

I'm doing quite well, thank you ever so much for asking. And I'm sure I'll catch up sooner or later.

[He's quite pointedly ignoring that last bit. Because that wouldn't be nearly as fun.]

[deaths_heritor]

I do hope those wounds don't get infected. I've heard terrible things about gangrene.

[updollsdresses]

They've been properly dressed. Don't you worry.

So, how was dying! Fun? Did dear old granddad show? Or were you... alone?

[deaths_heritor]

He didn't, as a matter of fact, but anyone with half a brain would have been able to tell you that.

[Alright. So it had been more than a little frightening at the end, but hell if she was going to say that.]

[godisachild]

[Oh, he'll be there. He'll be there so hard, you won't believe how much his angry little twelve-year old ass will be there. Just...waiting for you. Cause he'll be damned if he'll let someone call him out.]

[deaths_heritor]

Good morning, Mr. Minch. Shall we begin?

[Regardless of how long Porky has waited, Susan will appear out of nowhere, sitting at her desk with an expression on her face that indicates she has been waiting longer.]

[godisachild]

[I am not surprised I am not surprised I am not surprised]

I-

Yeah, I'm totally ready and I'm totally gonna smash whatever you give me.

[deaths_heritor]

Excellent. Your exam will be given orally. I hope there are no objections.

[Susan smiles a bit as she stands up and begins to pace in front of her desk.]

[lordofhiscity]

Yes, Miss Sto Helit?

[deaths_heritor]

I believe you are the father of a girl who calls herself the Childlike Empress. Is that correct?

[lordofhiscity]

In this universe, I believe you would be correct.

[deaths_heritor]

Good. Now I assume I don't have to tell you about Teatime. You ought to remember him well enough.

What I need from you is a favor. Watch over your 'daughter' carefully, Lord Vetinari. She's convinced that the man is nothing but a misunderstood vagrant who needs a second chance or some oddly cliched literary character along those lines.