(no subject)
how do you know if love is true and why do people calling missing your house home sickness i know what homesick really means i have it everday its getting sick everytime you walk through those damn doors and looking in to the face of the godam dictators called parents ICP put it very well "do you love because you love or because you have to he i probably love my family more than any one else but my homies are family too third cousins get outta here" any one else agree im not home yet but i have literally been sick for the last weeek since i found out my parents were going to be here in a week or so god i hate them and i cant stand how people will never comment in my journal then get mad at me when i dont comment in theres knowing damn well they dont even read mine god it pisses me off hardcore i love nofx and chris bouchard and brooke parker and well my dog and laura nelson in a whole diffrent waymore like a twin sister though she is awesome you know she actually pays attention to what i am saying brooke never would cuz she wouldnt get close to me which i still dont understand and chris was always either too high or around other people and when hes around other people he gets well i dont know diffrent he must quite smoking i miss mary and patrick and and well shit i even miss yeates because that was the only damn place that i ever got to see anyone DID I MENTION I HATE MY PARENTS DAMN CONTRLOLING UPTIGHT OPIONIONIZED AROGANT POMPOUS ASS-HOLES AND I HATE MY SISTER TOO SHE IS JUS FLAT OUT A BIG FAT BIATCH! GRRRRRRRRRRRRR..........grrrrrrr....grr.wait im feeling better my hapiness is rising ....rising still coming .............ahhhhhh ilove porn hahaha so gay hardcore this is what happens when you becomea pathetic loser who has.........count 'em...........zero friends i just want someone who i can depend on someone who will hold and you wonder why my strength runs out i support so many other people it seemed like eveyday i had to hold and comfort and be strong for every one would lean on me and i became stronger and stronger until i just completely had no feelings i lived in other people lives how ever someone else needed me to feel thats how i was and now i have nothing to be for i have no one to hold up i can hold everyone at once every one bt one person and that is me what happened why me i just wantto be normal i dont care what it takes i want to hate my parentsand have no reason other than the fact that i am a teenager wouldnt that be something actually have someone else to lean on ha thats a laugh not me i'll move somewhere new i'll adjust and adapt and change when needed and i will keep holding others up continueing to stumble through life blind weak and ignorant on the one thing that matters what it is like to be loved i will always be the one that is used again and again and jsut as many times forgotten and no one cares cuz no one knows doesnt that have some irony in it maybe just a little ha why is it that i cry everytime i think of brooke because i know she might hurt herself instead oftinking about how she makes me smile when im with her and why do i getnervous everytime i think of chris nad wonder what kind of drugs he did today instead of remembering how he could always make me feel better with out ever asking me what was bothering me he jsut knew somehow when i needed someone to make me laugh i just want to GO HOME WHAT IS SO WRONG WITH THAT HUH HUH WHATS THE PROBLEM WHY CANT I JUST HAVE SOME SIBLANCE OF A NORMAL CHILDHOOD well how can i say that when i dont even know what normal is everyone has problems but mine seem to hurt so bad well im gonna talk to patty for a while and no one will cuz no reads my journa ohh well night!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 8-(