(no subject)
I'm not sure what to do anymore. This isn't fair to Hisoka at all. The nightmares are getting worse and the perpetual fear is returning. I don't want to rely on Hisoka too much right now, though. He needs me as much as I need him.
The stone An gave me has stopped affecting me in that state. I think the blackouts have returned, though, instead of gaps in my memories, I see things as they're not. Albeit, Hisoka seems to be the exception. An, though...she appears as Ruka. So, I think I may end up clinging to her during these times.
I feel so horrible for being such a burden all the time. I'm starting to feel I'm going more insane.
The problem with all this? It's not Muraki doing it. It's just...lingering effects. Was this what he was going for?
((OOC: Tsuzuki thinks he privated this, but obviously failed hard. Please forgive him. /o/ Obviously, everyone can see this so commenting is allowed.))
The stone An gave me has stopped affecting me in that state. I think the blackouts have returned, though, instead of gaps in my memories, I see things as they're not. Albeit, Hisoka seems to be the exception. An, though...she appears as Ruka. So, I think I may end up clinging to her during these times.
I feel so horrible for being such a burden all the time. I'm starting to feel I'm going more insane.
The problem with all this? It's not Muraki doing it. It's just...lingering effects. Was this what he was going for?
((OOC: Tsuzuki thinks he privated this, but obviously failed hard. Please forgive him. /o/ Obviously, everyone can see this so commenting is allowed.))