Logurt / Kurtofsky / Spoilersssss
So. After strong attempts to avoid reading it, I finally caved and pulled up the damn fic that everyone keeps talking about; CP Coulter's "Dalton."
Oh my god.
My heart breaks for Logan. Like, I want to see Blaine pushed in front of a bus.
"He's not worth all this!"
Logan slumped down onto the ground the way he did during Sectionals, after Kurt had slapped him and fled his presence, leaving him cold with nothing to grasp on. It was like a candle going out, leaving him in the dark, angry and confused all over again. He put his hands to his temples. He wanted that light back.
"…yes he is."
See why? Yes. Fuck DapperFace McShittyAdvice; Logan's the one. Yes. Kurt needs Logan, Logan needs Kurt. Happy ending.
I think I might be the only person who ships -- christ, can you ship something in fanfiction? -- that, judging by what I've seen on the forums. But still. Logan FTW.
I'ma tell you the truth here; I bawled when Logan told Kurt he loved him, and Kurt's just like: ":o ... -Blaine singing- *swoooooon* :DD"
'cause seriously, baby gay. NO. It shoulda been: ":o <333333 *commence sweet boy kisses* /happily ever after"
And then the New Year's scene...I died inside. I couldn't read anymore after that, because Logan's just like "I'm totally ridiculously in love with you, and you make me feel good, and I hate being numb because you're amazing and will you marry me and have a million gay babies with me?!" And then Kurt's like. "Hm -- nothanks! I like hobbits who tease and give me crappy advice and don't stand up for me. Sorry! :D"
So yeah. I stopped reading after that scene. To be honest with you, I don't really like the fic that much. The characters are fascinating, but I just can't get into it. Eventually I just started skimming through until I read Logan's name. :/
END.DALTON.RANT.
Kurtofsky. I've said all along that I can't and won't ship it, because being a homosexual isn't an excuse for being a homobasher. And yet, the hiatus does strange things to my mind, and I actually read a couple Kurtofsky fics that I liked. Now, I'm not saying I'm going to ship it. I'm not saying that the pairing makes any more sense to me now. I'm not saying that I want them to run off into the sunset.
All I'm saying is that Karofsky has a cuddly-looking frame, and Kurt needs a wall-of-meat/sassy gay BFFL, and I think Karofsky could fit the bill if he stops spazzing and starts being a pal. Besides, the "Born this Way" episode -- fuckyeah, btw -- is about Karofsky, and, um, Gaga? Yeah.
END.KURTOFSKY.WHATEVERNESS.
Oh my god, spoilers, spoilers, spoilers.
1. Born this Way -- YESYESYESNOWPLEAZ. I have been dying for another Gaga episode since, oh, Theatricality? Because Gaga -- yes. (And because Kurt didn't get nearly enough Gaga solos, seriously, wtf.) And an episode with Gaga's new single (February 13th BB!) about Karofsky (hopefully) accepting his sexuality? Preferably with the song being sung to him by Kurt and Blaine in an effort to tell him "It's okay to be different"? EPIC POTENTIAL.
2. HolHoliday -- YESSSS. I can't say I'm happy that she's coming back as a love interest for Schue (doesn't the guy get enough action? Not cool.), but I'm ecstatic that she is coming back in general. As a Sex. Ed teacher, at that. I repeat, YESSSS. I hope Kurt's at WMHS for that. Because she's his girl crush, and she'd be the one to bring him back. And, you know that Puck would be the person to ask about gay sex for Kurt's sake. ;D
3. April Rhodes -- :D I really don't think anything sums it up more than that emote.
4. JBiebs -- LOLOLOL. So. Sammy's going to want Q back, apparently? Lame. I'd much rather think that Sammy's going to be singing something like "One Less Lonely Girl Boy" to Kurt, or that smile song, or even "Baby." Because I want him to come out of the closet already; it's obvious he's on Kurt's team. ;P
5. When I Get You Alone -- So, I Youtube'd the song when I heard Blaine was going to be singing it. Um. Wow. I was very uncomfortable with the lyrics, and thus, instantly understood why Blaine is supposedly singing it to Kurt. Because "Teenage Dream" (put your hands on me in my skintight jeans; let's go all the way tonight, no regrets, just love) was suggestive, in a subtle and convenient sort of way. And then "Hey, Soul Sister" had innuendos in the full-version that make me giggle every time (like a virgin or Madonna, and I'm always gonna wanna blow your UNF mind). And then "Baby, it's Cold Outside" -- I'm pretty sure I don't have to say it, but I will anyway.
DATERAPEDATERAPEDATERAPE. (Say, what's in this drink?; gosh your lips look delicious; ooh your lips are delicious and then all that eyesex.)
So yeah. Blaine's not really subtle. And if he has a boyfriend already, like I think he does (yes, looking at you Flint), then he's a douchebag and a tease. And Finn's going to have to kick his ass before sweeping Kurt up into his arms and loving him all the way back to McKinley.
6. Groffles -- I haven't seen many articles talking about him; are we getting JsJ back for the Back Nine? -puppy eyes-
END.
Arrrg, finals and unit tests this week. If I can get them done by the end of this week, I have all of next week off.
Naturally, I'm going to procrastinate until the last night and crammmmmm.