"it's a weird world don't you know it"

[deardickens]

i know i haven't posted in awhile. there's not much to say. i'm still the same me...

some things have happened:

-like seeing BSB in NYC really close, almost getting to touch them but not quite (the new album is great!!!!!!)
-David Gray is coming to DC in august, wish me luck at getting tickets
-saw one of my favorite bands/friends Fools and Horses. they are working on their new CD which is exciting
-working at Ben & Jerry's like usual

i'm just wondering, in the spurts of activity and life in my existence, could things be better if i was a different person?

if I dressed a little differently- would you love me?
if I said a little more- would you care?
if I kept up with my corespondence
if I changed my personality-
where would I be?

I think of so many things to say
so often in my head most times,
getting lost between the the real world and mine
but my ending silence makes me pay
am I slipping away?

maybe one more email, one more letter
maybe one more smile will be enough
maybe it's delusion clouding my eyes
what could I do to make it better?
say something to this girl, don't let her

fade away.

Question: what's your type of girl?
what do I lack?
should I invite myself over,
or step back?
should I be more silly or more serious
am I spinning somewhere near the right track?

Question: do I make the first move
and risk exposure?
Do I wait forever
for you to come over?
should I remain the wallflower, cross my fingers
forget-me-not, you're my four leaf clover......

(impromtue (yeah, yeah, spelling) poem/lyric....*blah*)