maddy you're such a great girl , i really don't deserve someone like you as a friend . i have issues with tending to neglect & take for granted those who give to me . sometimes i just have to take out my frustrations from everything that's going on onto someone , and goshisoundexactlylikemystepmomwhenisaythisanditmakesmewanttokillmyself but you're around me alot and for some reason i have to freak out on you . i really don't want to put you in the same category as that tape . i'm such a horrible person for doing that . i don't know why i insist on not hanging out with you & amanda & lisa all at the same time , i .. don't know . i think i'm just kind of afraid i'll lose them , but now i'm afraid i'm losing you . you can be violent sometimes , and i think it affects me in the way it does because it reminds me of my stepmom , and it's scary to think that people i escape to are the exact same way the people i'm escaping from are . i know you don't mean it to mean that to me , but it does . i think we need to be more open with each other . i hate how this sounds like we just broke up but i still want to go out with you . you tell me whenever i'm being a bitch [ i've realized i can do it without even realizing it ] , and i'll tell you when something you're doing is bothering me . deal ?
i love you . <3
ps ; that last picture should die & i don't think i'm looking at the camera in a single one . but my makeup looks good anyway ! i love you so much , darling .
you're such a great girl , i really don't deserve someone like you as a friend . i have issues with tending to neglect & take for granted those who give to me . sometimes i just have to take out my frustrations from everything that's going on onto someone , and goshisoundexactlylikemystepmomwhenisaythisanditmakesmewanttokillmyself but you're around me alot and for some reason i have to freak out on you . i really don't want to put you in the same category as that tape . i'm such a horrible person for doing that . i don't know why i insist on not hanging out with you & amanda & lisa all at the same time , i .. don't know . i think i'm just kind of afraid i'll lose them , but now i'm afraid i'm losing you . you can be violent sometimes , and i think it affects me in the way it does because it reminds me of my stepmom , and it's scary to think that people i escape to are the exact same way the people i'm escaping from are . i know you don't mean it to mean that to me , but it does . i think we need to be more open with each other . i hate how this sounds like we just broke up but i still want to go out with you . you tell me whenever i'm being a bitch [ i've realized i can do it without even realizing it ] , and i'll tell you when something you're doing is bothering me . deal ?
i love you . <3
ps ; that last picture should die & i don't think i'm looking at the camera in a single one . but my makeup looks good anyway ! i love you so much , darling .
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