Yuletide Jitters?
Dear self,
Why exactly are we getting all weird inside about a reading for ourselves later today? I mean, especially after that card that slipped out just for us as we were pulling cards for that one reading today for someone else...that card seemed like a pretty damn good hint at what we can expect in the reading later today.
Perhaps it's just that sense of longing coming to a head again--between general isolation, not seeing them, and S's bullshit that makes the most logical sense. But we'll see what the cards have to say later today--after proper sleep and S is the fuck out of our hair.
*sigh*,
me
Dear S,
If you were capable of self-reflection I'd ask you to consider just how much you've fucked up that hearing your giggling over stupid shit with your side bitch feels worse to my ears than nails to a chalkboard...especially when--in what feels like a whole other lifetime ago--I used to love to hear you laugh...
Alas, you're not capable of self-reflection. Gods I can't wait to be able to leave you, and not just to see how bad you flail and fumble without me being the one to handle everyday shit for you.
Dear You,
Ye gods how I miss you...do you miss me too..? I hope you don't interpret the silence on my end as lack of interest...I know all too well that the wrong thing at the wrong time could make for a massive headache for both of us, and I also know you're always busy as hell...it's not that I don't want to reach out, I just don't want to risk trouble for either or both of us and something tells me now isn't a time for reaching out on multiple levels. But I do hope to see you--and get to actually talk to you for more than a moment--soon...
Longingly,
Me