How Do I Technobabble This?

[clockwork_doc]

Doc walks into the Nexus with his head slightly bowed, muttering to himself. "There must be a logical way to go about this. A way that won't traumatize us both for life. She's a fairly bright -- child, she'll -- Great Scott, how do I do this?! Damn horny -- well, I guess they're not teenagers anymore

Comments

[disinformative]

"A point-by-point presentation? Simple diagrams? You know some people save up their weirdest metaphors for a chance like this. Nooot that I'd recommend using them." Niss pulls a bit of a face. "Talk about hindering communication. Anyway. Just keep it simple, keep it factual and above all." She leans forward intently. "Never. Show. Fear."

[clockwork_doc]

Doc half-smiles at that last bit. "I need to work on that, I think. I've been deflecting her questions for now -- very simplistic answers -- but I know she's not going to stop until she gets some real information. I'm good at diagrams, but I think I'd be a bit uncomfortable using them for a talk like this." He sighs, rubbing his head. "I don't know if this would be any easier or harder were her human form older." He nods. "Simple and factual sounds good, though."

[disinformative]

"Oh, she changes forms? That explains it." What 'it' is explained she... doesn't clarify! "Simplistic answers make it too obvious you're holding back, you see. If you give people a bundle of information at once they feel a lot more satisfied, even if you've left out most of it. Even if they don't understand any of it, sometimes." She giggles like she's describing the antics of a silly pet.

[clockwork_doc]

Maybe the fact that Doc's trying to explain human reproduction to what most people would think is an inanimate object? At least, that's what Doc's going with. Doc can't help but smirk in agreement. "Precisely why I talk the way I do sometimes. People don't seem to think you're intelligent unless you use long, complicated words." He shrugs. "Granted, my field of study often DOES use long, complicated words, and sometimes I just feel like being silly with them, but you get the idea."

[chiron_survivor]

Adia is busy reading a beat-up paperback, but her attention is caught by the names Doc mentions. She blinks at him, surprised. Does this mean her advice worked? She feels a little proud about that. Weirdly proud. She coughs and sets aside her book.

"Human reproduction is pretty easy to explain if you stick to the mechanics. But, um... explaining why people like to kiss and everything else is different than that."

[clockwork_doc]

Oh, it worked. Victor's note to Alice got her rushing over to correct his misapprehensions. Of course, taking into account why Doc's here and what he's asking, it may have worked slightly too well.

"Even the mechanics make my stomach twist up," Doc says, looking a little embarrassed. "I've never had to explain this to anyone before. Certainly not to a car that changes into a little girl." Oh, the perils of becoming an accidental father. . . .

[chiron_survivor]

"A little girl?" Well, this does make things more complicated. Adia frowns thoughtfully. "Can she read? There are books for children about this sort of thing, you could give her one to look at. Or maybe have someone else explain it to her, if it bothers you that much."

[clockwork_doc]

"She can -- she's very smart for her apparent age," Doc says. "I suppose that makes things easier on me, it's just. . . ." He spreads his hands. "This is all new territory to me. Not something I ever pictured myself doing." He nods to her suggestion, though. "I think I ought to be the one to explain, but a book might help. . . ."

[bubbly_bot]

"Oh, I remember when we had to explain that to Zero. We just looked for, um, technical stuff. Like medical information and stuff on human biology. I think it's better to explain it that way and not let it get all weird."

[clockwork_doc]

Aha, someone with experience. "Keep to the 'mechanics of everything' route? I could do that, though it would probably still be a little awkward," Doc says, frowning. "The less weirdness the better, though." This is weird enough, honestly.

[bubbly_bot]

Bubble nods. "It's really a lot easier that way. And at least that way it's accurate. We'd heard a lot of weird things before the Nexus, and we didn't really want to tell Zero most of that... Especially since we were pretty sure most of it wasn't right."

"Um, are they old enough to read? Maybe there's a book explaining things you can find and then you won't have to actually say anything?"

[clockwork_doc]

"I'm not sure I want to know what you found out here," Doc says, eyes shifting from side to side.

"She is, yes," he nods. "Someone else suggested a book too -- I may get her one. I just feel like I should say something as well. Fatherly duty and all."

[kalel_ofkrypton]

Clark looks a little different today, almost glowing slightly, if you look closely. But he gives the question all the due consideration it deserves. "Do you have to go that far? Couldn't you just tell her that it's something adults do and she'll find out when she's older?"

[clockwork_doc]

"Trust me, I know she won't be satisfied with that answer," Doc groans. "Great Scott, I wish I could have gotten away with just telling her about kissing. But oh no, she had to see a certain -- bulge in a certain young man's trousers. . . ." He lets out a deep sigh that stirs up a little wind. "They couldn't have closed the door. . . ."

[kalel_ofkrypton]

Clark can't help a slight wince. "Just because she's not satisfied with the answer doesn't mean you have to tell her the truth, though."

[clockwork_doc]

"Maybe. . .I don't know. Maybe I am making a bigger deal out of this than I should be." He snorts. "Though I can't exactly go about telling her about storks now either, can I?"

[clanoftheswords]

"Pictures?" Farley smiles reminiscently, remembering the Skid and Aubrey and glad the pain's gotten better.

[clockwork_doc]

Doc blanches for a moment, then frowns thoughtfully. "Actually, illustrations -- I don't know. It's very hard to determine what's appropriate for her because of her unique circumstances."

[clanoftheswords]

"Nothing involving porn. In fact, hide the porn. And hope no one's taught her how to pick locks." He frowns thoughtfully. "And maybe a little chat on the difference between the feelings you get from here-" He gestures at his chest. "And, well, you get the idea..."

Farley leans forward, curious. "So, Victor and Alice making out?"

[clockwork_doc]

"Trust me, I wasn't going to show her my Playboys," Doc says, looking a little embarrassed. "Definitely need to put those in a safer place. . . . And yes, that's a good idea." He shakes his head. "Last thing I expected to be doing this week."

He nods, rolling his eyes. "Rather intensely. The whole reason I'm doing the sex talk is because Dee happened to notice a 'bulge' in Victor's pants." He sighs. "Apologies if that's a bit too much information."