(Untitled)

[onlyfive]

Lucy McClane has found herself with her own questions, and for once is going to voice them instead of trolling other people. She's sprawled out in a chair in what can arguably be called 'pajamas' and she has a pair of ridiculous furry bunny ears in her hand, twirling them lazily. Are those rhinestones? Maybe"I have two today, since one of them is a

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[one_drafted_man]

Lucy may not be able to see the raised eyebrow, as Grif takes in just how she's currently dressed, but it's there. Oh, yes, it's there, mildly puzzled yet wryly amused.

"Well, from what little I remember of them, my parents weren't necessarily the best models for guessing any one else's behavior, but generally speaking, if I thought they wouldn't take it well, I'd go about telling them... after I've already got the job. Then it's too late, unless they want to ruin their child's career before it's even begun, insert hand on forehead and fake swooning here."

Grif is apparently unaware of how his style of excessive melodrama is likely to go over in the McClane/Gennaro household(s).

"As for presents, uh, I'm not sure I've ever gotten any that'd qualify as embarrassing, but only really 'cause getting them isn't exactly a common occurrence for me. I mean, Church used to give all of us in the Gulch smoal for Christmas, but cheap synthetic coal isn't so much embarrassing as it is annoying."

[onlyfive]

She is a bunny, Grif. :( A CUTE ONE. ... Anyway.

"That would work really well except for the fact that my ... dad works in the exact same area in the exact same job I want so I would be busted so hard." Her face is very elaborately sad, for the record. "Also my dad would explode, I don't know. It might get messy." EXPLODING THINGS.

"... Man, coal for Christmas is kind of a dick move."

[one_drafted_man]

Well, yes, but dressed as a bunny, in the middle of the Nexus? Grif sees that as just asking for trouble. ...Okay, it is maybe kind of a little bit adorable.

"Oh, they'd tell him that his kid was looking for a job? What's he do?" He pauses for a moment. "Does he actually have a tower? I ask 'cause I know a guy who does, so you never know. Anyway, if you can't be sneaky, then deploy the booze. Next morning, the memory of what you told him will be dwarfed by the hangover."

He nods. "Yeah, well, Church was a pretty dickish kind of guy. I mean, like I said, it wasn't even actual coal. Coal costs maybe a couple bucks per ton, and that was way more than he was going to spend, so instead we got a knockoff that didn't even burn properly."

[onlyfive]

THEY ARE NORMAL PAJAMAS. D: Also if anyone tries to touch her either the AVF will stop them or she will break their fingers if it fails. Lucy is a pleasant girl!

"He would be there! He's a cop so uh, word travels fast between everyone, most of them have known me since I was tiny. Booze might be good, I think I'll try it." Giving John booze MAY NOT BE THE BEST IDEA, LUCY. "I don't think he has an actual tower? But he could probably lock me in his apartment or something."

"That sucks so hard, I would have punched him." What. Also, Lucy may be contemplating giving you a top hat that fits atop your helmet Grif, have fun with that.

[one_drafted_man]

Yeah, but bunny ears are just asking for getting hit with a bunny-transformation LOL, and then what? ...Hopping around eating carrots, that's what, which might not be so bad, who knows. Anyway.

"Aw, man, you're signing up with The Man?" The plaintive tone of his voice might, possibly, imply some past difficulties with the law. Maybe. "Can't you give him a little speech about wanting to help protect the property and the citizenry of the city of wherever? Is he the kind of guy to shut you down for trying to sound all noble and shit?"

Grif might not mind the top hat, Lucy. He could wear it with his armor-sized tuxedo.

"Yeah, well, he was on the other side of the stupid fake civil war, anyway, so it's not like we didn't have plenty of chances to shoot him." Talk of shootings is, of course, the perfect time to offer a handshake, and so he does. "Name's Grif."

[onlyfive]

That's true. :( She likes carrots though, it ... might be okay. She's already been a hamster before! A hamster on a piano, eating popcorn, on a piano.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. It's one of those things. Sounding noble might help some, I think. He gives speeches sometimes, so he might just give up and feel like he rubbed off on me too much."

Good. There will be one delivered ... WHERE EVER. Tomorrow. Enjoy your hat!

"I do approve of shooting him, good show." Lucy is wholly not against shootings, and she shakes his hand, grinning. "Lucy."

[one_drafted_man]

"Well, there you go. If there's one thing I've learned from my, uh, entirely small-time youthful indiscretions, it's that appealing to a good cop's better nature can sometimes get you a bit of slack." Grif, why do you say these things.

He will treasure it forever, although relevant acts of icon Photoshoppery will have to wait for another night.

"Yeah, well, he actually ended up getting killed by one of his own team, and then came back as a ghost, so it's not like the shooting did any of us any good." Yes, he said came back as a ghost. "Nice to meet you, Lucy."

[onlyfive]

"Maybe he will also feel sorry for me if I am cute and sad." Lucy, no. This is your father we're talking about, sweetie. "Also, him never finding out about my own um, tiny indiscretions is probably a good thing." See: MORE INTERGALACTIC LAWS.

The verdict: Most excellent.

Lucy, to her own credit, is... well, not phased at all by the ghost thing. "Tell me that he at least couldn't give you shitty fake coal as a ghost?" Priorities. "It's nice to meet you too!"

[one_drafted_man]

"Rolling out the Big Sad Eyes certainly can't hurt. Were these indiscretions things you did as a kid and didn't get caught for, or have you been using the Nexus to engage in hooliganism?" Not that Grif would ever do such a thing himself. Nope. Never.

"Unfortunately, no. As a ghost, he could possess people. And robots. So it was more smoal all around the next year, too. He also enjoyed doing shit like shooting ornaments off the Christmas tree with the sniper rifle. Never did find out just what his beef was with the holiday; personally, I find it one of the most profitable times of the year."

[onlyfive]

"Ummmmm, the latter?" :( She has the good grace to look sheepish and fidgety, for the record. "Apparently interfering with intergalactic police is against space laws, who knew!" ... Sigh.

"See, now that just calls for an emergency exorcism. I think if someone shot ornaments off the Christmas tree I'd kill them," pause a beat, "again. I really love Christmas, personally. It's my faaavorite time of year."

[one_drafted_man]

Grif laughs. "Shit, dude, if I'd known more cops like you, I might not have had quite so many problems, growing up. Also, those space cops should thank you for making their lives more interesting. I mean, space is pretty boring, or at least it is back home."

Of course, Grif's universe doesn't have all of the crap in it that the MiBs' does, but still.

"Yeah, well, he managed to get himself resurrected somehow, a couple of months after we all ended up here, so I suppose I could do that, if he and everyone else hadn't cleared out of Blood Gulch by now."

[onlyfive]

"Well I mean, technically we helped save a planet and made an alien race bent on destroying everything be pacifists instead, so it's not like we ruined their day or anything." THEY WERE HELPING, REALLY.

"Well I mean if you see him again that just means you really can shoot him and make it count?" Oh my god Lucy, stop.

[one_drafted_man]

"So, what, you were helping out, and the space cops didn't dig the vigilante help, or something? Pssht. Figures. Personally, I'd be inclined to take what I can get." He has, obviously, totally been there himself.

He shrugs. "Eh. I haven't seen him in... over two years, and the war's over, anyway, so as far as I'm concerned, he can just go fuck off." After a moment, something seems to occur to him, and he says, his voice filled with wonder, "Come to think of it, I outrank him, these days. I could order him to fuck off. I... I gotta watch out. Shit like that could accidentally give a guy a good feeling about being in the military."

[onlyfive]

"Actually, they didn't arrest us or fine us or anything and I have coffee with one of them sometimes, it ended up being a pretty sweet deal."

She laughs now, warmly, crossing her arms over her chest. "No, I think that good feeling is justly earned and for something pretty cool and hilarious, personally." ... Not gonna lie here, she probably just wants to see someone get ordered to fuck off.

[one_drafted_man]

"Oh, so it was just a bit of dangerous adventure, but you're not actually in any legal trouble? Nice. Way better than I'm used to, anyway." He chuckles for a moment, but it's gotten a little bit brittle.

In fact, Grif actually flails a little bit, hands briefly unsure where to go before one settles on the forehead of his helmet and the other looks like its trying to pull words out of some unspecified point in front of him. "No, see, it's... I'm a draftee. Between retarded circumstances and a bit of time travel, I am, in fact, the one drafted man in the UNSC's twelve-hundred-year history. Hating the fact that I'm stuck in the Army, even with the war centuries over, is kind of my thing. I can't go and start enjoying it, now."

[onlyfive]

"I'm pretty sure we were just the luckiest delinquents alive, I actually kind of did expect, like, space prison..." Scavenger hunts, who knew?

"... Well, does it still count if no one else knows? Because if it helps I won't tell a soul, cross my heart. That way you can enjoy that part but still project the aura of hating the shit out of the Army." She waves a hand, ineffectually.