the best christmas present ever.
oh yay!! it's christmas. awesome.. fuuuuuuck that. i dont like it. i hate it even. i didnt ask for anything this year because i know the only thing i want no one can give me. i dont need money or a flashy new outfit. i want to be happy and i want to smile. and mean it. and i want to forget about everything and never worry aout it again. but that is IMPOSSIBLE!! but thats what i want. and i just want my best friend to actually tell me the truth. i need to hear it from someone that is actually awesome enough to tell me that that no matter what i do i will still be the extremely sad and pathetic person i have always been. constantly hanging on every word one of them had said. hoping that this one will be different. thinking that i finally have a chance to have something everyone hopes for. but ill never get it. i dont deserve it. im worthless, ugly. im nothing. and a million boys have said this in there own ways, but no matter time its been hinted to me, i still hope that i have a chance. and i truly wish that one of my true friends would help me realize this so i dont spend andother day hoping. but rather sitting alone realizing this is the way it will be. now that would be a good christams gift.
merry christmas everyone.
merry christmas everyone.