Fic: "A Winchester's Lullaby"
Title: A Winchester's Lullaby
Rating: K+
Characters: Dean Winchester, Sam Winchester, John Winchester
Word count: ~1300
Summary: Dean can't sleep because he misses his mommy. Daddy doesn't sleep at all anymore, and baby Sammy won't stop crying. Dean is four, Sam is six months old.
Four-year-old Dean Winchester missed his mommy. He missed his mommy so bad that it even made his tummy hurt. That was why he couldn't sleep - or maybe he couldn't sleep because no one had kissed him goodnight. Dean's mommy had always kissed him goodnight when he had to go to sleep - his daddy too - but his mommy was in heaven now and his daddy…. Dean's lip quivered and he let out a small sob. Daddy wasn't really Daddy anymore; not like the daddy he had used to be.
Dean curled up on his side on the bed in the small motel room and peeked towards his daddy who was on the couch - his back turned against his oldest son. Daddy used to smile and laugh all the time but now he didn't. Now he spent most of his time on the couch with shoulders that shook every now and then, and with a bottle of something Dean knew he wasn't allowed to touch. Whenever Daddy drank of the bottle, it made him even less like himself, and Dean didn't like that one bit. He wanted his daddy back - just like he wanted his mommy back.
An ear-piercing wail cut through the air, making Dean wince as he covered his ears with his hands. Sammy was sad again and that made Dean sad too.
"Why is Sammy crying, Mommy?" Dean had asked his mom once.
"Sam is crying because there is something he wants to tell us but he hasn't learned how to speak yet, angel." His mom had answered with a smile before picking up the crying baby.
"But what is he saying?" Dean had asked which had made his mom chuckle. Dean loved when he made his mommy chuckle.
"He could be saying that he's hungry or wet." Dean's mom had said. "But sometimes all babies need is a little hug."
She had then hugged Sammy to her chest while shushing him and the baby had eventually settled down. Why couldn't Mommy be here right now? Sammy was still crying on the top of his lungs and Daddy didn't do anything to stop it. Dean felt like crying too from hearing his baby brother hurting like that and he rubbed a bit at his eyes, feeling his hand turn moist in the process. Dean couldn't let Sam continue to cry like that - to try to say something that Dean didn't understand what was.
The oldest Winchester brother moved his blanket aside and crawled off the bed before carefully tip-toeing towards his father. Dean stopped up at a safe distance, wondering if his dad would be mad at Dean for disturbing him.
"Daddy?" Dean asked in a small voice.
His dad grunted his answer and Dean bit his lower lip for a moment.
"Daddy, Sammy is.." Dean started when he was cut off by his father's gruff voice.
"Not now, Dean." His dad said.
"But Sammy is crying." Dean tried, willing his dad to feel the gravity of the statement that he himself felt.
"Dean." His father sighed without turning around. "Not. Now."
Dean's forehead wrinkled and the corners of his mouth turned downwards. How could Daddy know that Sammy was sad but not do anything about it? Dean then let his dad go back to whatever he was doing and walked to Sam's crib with determined steps.
"Hi Sammy." Dean whispered, holding on to the bars of the crib with both hands while looking at his upset baby brother.
Sam's face was wet from crying and tears still made their way down his cheeks, but the wailing had subsided a bit when Dean had started talking.
"You can't sleep?" Dean asked and reached a hand in between the bars to touch the younger brother. "Do you miss Mommy too?"
Dean caressed Sam's small hand and smiled a little when Sam then closed his hand around a couple of Dean's fingers.
"Don't cry, Sammy." Dean said to the big teary eyes that stared back at him. "Mommy isn't here but I am. Go to sleep, Sam."
Dean gave Sam's small hand a gentle squeeze and then let go of it so that he could get back to bed, but he hadn't taken more than one step away from the crib, before Sam started wailing again.
"Ouch, you're hurting my ears!" Dean exclaimed and shot Sam a little glare that dissolved as fast as it had appeared when he saw how upset Sam had turned once more. "What's wrong, Sammy?"
Dean remembered what his mom had once said about crying babies. Was Sam hungry? Wet? From his position on the outside of the crib, Dean couldn't check Sam's diaper like his mommy had showed him how to do, so he glanced warily towards his dad's turned back, before Dean dragged a chair to the side of the crib and carefully climbed into it.
The oldest brother had barely reached the mattress before baby Sammy had fisted Dean's pajamas shirt with his small chubby hands, holding on as if his life depended on it.
"Let go, silly-head." Dean chuckled and tried to pry Sam's hands away from his shirt. "I can't see your diaper this way."
But Sam wouldn't let go. Something then occurred to Dean and he tipped his head a bit to the side and looked at his brother with wonder.
"You're not hungry or wet?" Dean stated more than asked.
He then lay down next to Sam and wrapped his arms around the small baby, holding him close while shushing him like he'd seen his mommy do once. And Sammy finally stopped crying.
"You just needed a hug." Dean smiled and placed a kiss on Sam's forehead.
Sam let out a sigh and his little eyelids began to droop. Dean remembered that their mother had always been singing a song to him when he was about to fall asleep. The oldest Winchester brother didn't remember the words but he did remember the tunes, so he started humming for his baby brother and continued doing it until they were both asleep.
If Dean had looked in his father's direction by then, he would have seen his dad's shoulders shake once more as tears made their way down his cheeks. But John Winchester had no longer his back turned to his boys. If his four year old son was brave enough to forget about himself in order to take care of his baby brother, then John could pull himself together as well. He put the bottle of whiskey away and then started working on a plan for what was going to happen from now on.
And while the oldest Winchester worked, his two boys slept through the entire night - for the first time since they'd lost their mother.
THE END