(no subject)
i had bad dreams
so bad i threw my pillow away
i think i have an eating disorder. i never eat. ever. i don't like food. it doesn't taste good and whenever i buy food i think it's a waste. i have to force myself to eat a full meal. food sickens me.
whatever.
anorexia is just a bad word that fat people have for "discipline".
i was sick yesterday. it could have been all the drinking and drugs. but it came out of nowhere. i was awake for hours, up and about... slightly hungover, but nothing horrendous. i was eating. trying to, actually. forcing down the last few bites of a sandwich/veggie burger thing. when i suddenly became ill.
my head kind of folded in on itself and i had to lay down and just breathe for a while. and thats all i did all day. lay around and did nothing.
real way to accomplish things.
my reward was a night of bad dreams and a complete lack of motivation this morning. yay life.