the past i regret
why is that you go to grasp what you see falling and it and just slips right through your hands? Falls into peices smaller than before you went to grab it... Why am i so confused that i can sit here and let the record play over and over completely lost and in pain. But can't exactly figure out where it is coming from. Where it began.... I heard a sayin a while back...'Life is easier without friends' You dont hear good advice like that much anymore.. usually you hear crap like 'you haven't lived if you haven't loved.' well i wouldn't call loving living but the feeling dying feels more fit. dont you agree?
I want to sit back and just watch it fall apart. see what it feels like to be on that side instead.... am i just accident prone.. life was hard in HS. but now i wake up and think damn am i going to make it today? am i going to have enough to eat today because i spent all my money on my car payment.. am i even going to have a car.. will i lose my home? will i go to see him and he still be there. or will it just be one more bad accusation and spiteful words from his side?