(no subject)
What is Interest?
Well according to dictionary.com interest is:
the feeling of a person whose attention, concern, or curiosity is particularly engaged by something
something that concerns, involves, draws the attention of, or arouses the curiosity of a person
power of exciting such concern, involvement, etc.; quality of being interesting
concern; importance
a participation in or concern for a cause, advantage, responsibility, etc.
influence from personal importance or capability; power of influencing the action of others
I'm sick of interest, interesting things, and interested in.
fuck all of thoose thing because they all lead to disappointment.
I really can't be bother to be interested in things anymore like history or geograpghy or school. I'm actually quite disinterested in school I feel like slashing my wrists at the though of going to it. I mean it could be these lame classes I'm taking right now or the fact that i lack motivation in things that do not causes an immediate or soon afterwards reward or change.
and intereted in? fuck that shit! I'm sick of being interested in people that have no interest in me other that fucking hurting me. ( NOTE: NOT JUST DEREC! ) i can't be bothered to put myself out there hoping for what? For some fucker just to hurt me or just use me forsex or hey lets do the whole Bryan thing and do it at the same fucking time .. why not seems like a great fucking plan.
I can't get hurt again ... I have nothing more to give .. nothing.
If this was the me of 3 years ago I'd probally say right now "All I want is someone to love me for me" but really and truely I dont want someone to love me or pretend to love me, to just leave me and hurt me and make me more bitter against the world.
I think it just hurt that someone who I though was my friend and nothing more even with mixed signals and everything would say something like that to hurt me, to intentially hurt me, make it their goal to do so.
Am I worth that little? am I that low of a person that someone would consider doing it?
I know deep down that I'm not but right now I feel that small, that low.
I should just stop getting "interested" in people I'm close to.
I've now lost two friends I though I was pretty close to due to me being interested in them and them not caring about me.
Well according to dictionary.com interest is:
I'm sick of interest, interesting things, and interested in.
fuck all of thoose thing because they all lead to disappointment.
I really can't be bother to be interested in things anymore like history or geograpghy or school. I'm actually quite disinterested in school I feel like slashing my wrists at the though of going to it. I mean it could be these lame classes I'm taking right now or the fact that i lack motivation in things that do not causes an immediate or soon afterwards reward or change.
and intereted in? fuck that shit! I'm sick of being interested in people that have no interest in me other that fucking hurting me. ( NOTE: NOT JUST DEREC! ) i can't be bothered to put myself out there hoping for what? For some fucker just to hurt me or just use me forsex or hey lets do the whole Bryan thing and do it at the same fucking time .. why not seems like a great fucking plan.
I can't get hurt again ... I have nothing more to give .. nothing.
If this was the me of 3 years ago I'd probally say right now "All I want is someone to love me for me" but really and truely I dont want someone to love me or pretend to love me, to just leave me and hurt me and make me more bitter against the world.
I think it just hurt that someone who I though was my friend and nothing more even with mixed signals and everything would say something like that to hurt me, to intentially hurt me, make it their goal to do so.
Am I worth that little? am I that low of a person that someone would consider doing it?
I know deep down that I'm not but right now I feel that small, that low.
I should just stop getting "interested" in people I'm close to.
I've now lost two friends I though I was pretty close to due to me being interested in them and them not caring about me.