It's been a long time coming

[deadblackrose]

So I'm constantly preaching about polyamory, and how I feel about it, and how much I believe in it. And I know a few people may be tired of hearing about it, but over the last year or so, I've had to sit down and actually think fairly hard about it. I'm getting to the point in my life that I probably should be thinking about what I want to do.

Comments

[pinkstatik]

Dear Joey,

I understand you feel you need to "figure out" where you stand on all of these issues, especially since you are at an age where serious relationships are more of the norm. I also understand how you feel about the things you have expressed.

Maybe you should just go about things in the way you always have -- showing care and love toward the people that mean a lot to you, being attracted to people, and dating people. And then, whatever happens from there, happens. If you feel jealousy, allow that to happen. In many relationships, I can completely understand your view. However, you should probably also be open to a non-polyamorous relationship. No need to push for it, no need to try for it. But just don't rule it out. Maybe the right thing will happen at some point in your life (even 20 years from now), and you'll be glad you allowed it to. And maybe not! Just keep on being you and allow things to happen as they may.

Love,
Kait

[deadblackrose]

Most of the time I really don't have a problem. Part of it, I think, is that a bunch of my close friends are all getting married this year, while four of my closest friends are now 2 couples. lol.

And I recently..well over the last year, have been off and on sleeping with and staying with a girl that seemed to be colder and just like me in the beginning, and apparently fell for me. This is what I get for sleeping with 18 year olds I suppose. That's one of the things that's making me question it so much. I've never had a problem with it before, but I've never had someone apparently this... intensly into me.

Plus with every other crazy thing going on in my life, this is about the only thing I can actually change. I can't stop school or work, can't fix my mom or grandmother. This is about it. I appreciate the fact that you read these btw Amanda, you've always given me good advice through here, or at least another viewpoint. Even if I don't always follow it.

[deadblackrose]

it actually seems to have worked itself out, somewhat. Now lets see how well I deal with a 6 class semester and fulltime work. haha

[deadblackrose]

Its actually funny. Michelle seems to get it perfectly. And she laughs at me, and tells me how silly I am, but she understands, which makes me feel better, and makes me realize I'm not just some horny kid looking for an excuse to sleep around.