explosion
I just needed to write this somewhere before I end up going crazy.
I think I just had a small anxiety attack. fuck that was out there. I haven't had something like that in years. It's almost like an out of body experience. I just couldn't breath, even though I was screaming in my head to calm the fuck down. Not fun at all.
I ended up fucking over my one count, or record or whatever the hell you wanna call it. Fuck.
At the same time though, I'm just pretty, numb I guess right now. I feel blank.
I knew I should have just stayed in bed this morning. It just did not feel right. I did not feel right.
I just feel like I've done everything that I can, and now, what's the point to keep on trying if nothing has come out of my hard work.
I need to get my fucking head straight before I do anything else to fuck myself up. I've been saying that to myself for years, and I have yet to do anything.
I need to either just sleep or take some advil. My head is pounding after that. It was the dumbest thing that set it off as well. I used to be so good and just bullshitting myself and everyone. I just wasn't able to do it today.
fuck.
I think I just had a small anxiety attack. fuck that was out there. I haven't had something like that in years. It's almost like an out of body experience. I just couldn't breath, even though I was screaming in my head to calm the fuck down. Not fun at all.
I ended up fucking over my one count, or record or whatever the hell you wanna call it. Fuck.
At the same time though, I'm just pretty, numb I guess right now. I feel blank.
I knew I should have just stayed in bed this morning. It just did not feel right. I did not feel right.
I just feel like I've done everything that I can, and now, what's the point to keep on trying if nothing has come out of my hard work.
I need to get my fucking head straight before I do anything else to fuck myself up. I've been saying that to myself for years, and I have yet to do anything.
I need to either just sleep or take some advil. My head is pounding after that. It was the dumbest thing that set it off as well. I used to be so good and just bullshitting myself and everyone. I just wasn't able to do it today.
fuck.