activism here
I'm really frustrated by the way activism works on campus at Oberlin. None of the information is really accessible and the activist community is very exclusive. Individuals who are not in certain clubs or friends with a select group that goes to conferences and meetings don't even know what is going on. I have friends within this social group and sit on the radical-leaning and activisty COPAO committee, and half the time I don't know what the deal is. With this coal plant, for example, Benjy explained the steps we were taking to oppose it to me in great detail, but failed to explain to me the specifics of the case, probably assuming I already knew.
It's weird to have activism and social anxiety mix so perfectly, and to become apathetic because I'm frustrated by the networky nature of social justice work here. I also am having trouble being an activist in a place where I can't tangibly see systems of oppression operating as clearly as I can in places with more of a class, racial, and political mix. Those that I can see are ignored by the student body (underpaid, overworked cafeteria workers and janitorial staff, for one). The Oberlin bubble makes me feel deadened, and the constantly academic approach to activism, while fun and fascinating, is really isolating to that part of me that wants to pragmatically go out and see the work I do make people think or the smallest rules change.
I was listening to this incredible speaker tonight (Suzan-Lori Parks, an award winning playwright and a strong, fierce woman) and she was talking about not ignoring the ideas in your head, but entertaining them, about doing what one felt was right. Sitting in Finney, all I could think of was "Yeah! This isn't right for me at all, this small college town. I'm going to go to New York to become a writer. Work at Bluestockings, double major in nonfiction/social inquiry at Lang, intern at Bust and Third Wave, take art classes, look for opportunities like urban gardening projects and work at shelters. In the summers I'll try and get an internship with Microcosm and go hang out in Bloomington with all the punks, or get work in Portland or Montreal." It's what I know in my heart that I need, but I'm so afraid of making the wrong choice, or that I'm "giving in" or failing.
This is the first time I've ever articulated this specific dream publicly before. Right now, what I've written above is what I want out of life. It's going against what I'm "supposed" to want (a traditional collegiate experience) and that's scary. I've only been decent at going against what I am "supposed" to be doing in the last year or so.
It's weird to have activism and social anxiety mix so perfectly, and to become apathetic because I'm frustrated by the networky nature of social justice work here. I also am having trouble being an activist in a place where I can't tangibly see systems of oppression operating as clearly as I can in places with more of a class, racial, and political mix. Those that I can see are ignored by the student body (underpaid, overworked cafeteria workers and janitorial staff, for one). The Oberlin bubble makes me feel deadened, and the constantly academic approach to activism, while fun and fascinating, is really isolating to that part of me that wants to pragmatically go out and see the work I do make people think or the smallest rules change.
I was listening to this incredible speaker tonight (Suzan-Lori Parks, an award winning playwright and a strong, fierce woman) and she was talking about not ignoring the ideas in your head, but entertaining them, about doing what one felt was right. Sitting in Finney, all I could think of was "Yeah! This isn't right for me at all, this small college town. I'm going to go to New York to become a writer. Work at Bluestockings, double major in nonfiction/social inquiry at Lang, intern at Bust and Third Wave, take art classes, look for opportunities like urban gardening projects and work at shelters. In the summers I'll try and get an internship with Microcosm and go hang out in Bloomington with all the punks, or get work in Portland or Montreal." It's what I know in my heart that I need, but I'm so afraid of making the wrong choice, or that I'm "giving in" or failing.
This is the first time I've ever articulated this specific dream publicly before. Right now, what I've written above is what I want out of life. It's going against what I'm "supposed" to want (a traditional collegiate experience) and that's scary. I've only been decent at going against what I am "supposed" to be doing in the last year or so.