The Love Discussion...
Before you read this long ass conversation... What I wish you to reflect on is the understanding of love and what it means to you. Is there a good and bad side to love? Honestly, how do you feel about it?
LJ cut for you guys! Look, I made the effort!
( Conversation on Love and Bobby )
Comments 4
I see a couple of good points up there.
Limerence is not an action. It's something that happens to one. One does not actively become limerent about someone. Rather, one sees someone else, and it just happens -- he/she falls in love.
So, the control also becomes important. Limerent people cannot prevent a bout of limerence from happening to them at all... At least, no logical measure of prevention works, like giving oneself why one shouldn't be limerent about a specific LO candidate. It happens first anyways, and that's why the control is important.
Now, there are a lot of logical axioms of love and romance. However, being logical means those axioms are often used deductively, like Love should or should not be like this and that, because of this and that consequences. This is, sadly, of less help to those badly limerent about someone. They understand that the particular bout of limerence is destructive for them, but it still doesn't help them to get over it. Logic does not override that strong feeling of limerence. ( ... )
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That's why I meant control is important. Love is love, and is separate from those destructive things like drugs that ruin the bearer. Those destructive things, one does have control over, and yes, it's stupid to relinquish the control over them.
What I mean is, how one becomes prone to, not actually opts in for, those things is beyond one's control. It's natural, for example, that we want to share common interest (music, books, whatever) with whom we love. Now, let's say that the interest, unfortunately, is a drug. Yes, it's bad, but we still are tempted to do it 'cause that's what the one that we love does. We cannot help ourselves from wanting to do it. It's beyond our control. However, we can help ourselves from actually doing it.
I'm not so well-versed in celebrity dramas, but if Whitney started using drugs just because Bobby did it too, yes, her lack of self-control is to be blamed. However, at the same time, it should be acknowledged that she probably had felt the strong, perfectly understandable desire to do it -- ( ... )
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