Gathering Wool with Guinan
For someone who didn't like space and space travel, Leonard had found a spot near a large window in one of the recreation rooms that gave him peace. It was generally quiet in the afternoons, though it tended to get more raucous in the evenings now that Guinan had appropriated part of the lounge for her bar.
But at this moment, there were just some people taking their lunch, reading, talking quietly. Music played softly and all in all, Leonard thought it was an improvement to his nook. "Good afternoon, ma'am," Leonard said to Guinan as he entered the room, walking toward his favorite chair. "Busy this afternoon?"
"Not at all, Doctor. I think people are recovering from Doctor M'Benga's party last night. You and the captain were missed," she added with a warm smile. "How is he feeling?"
"Better, thank you."
"And you, Doctor? How are you doing?" she asked, bringing him a glass of sweet tea, an unexpected surprise. Something about the expression on her face told him that she thought something might be wrong with him, but she didn't press.
"Pretty good," he told her, surprised at how much he meant it. The last few days - between Jim being ill and their talk of marriage and the discovery of Thor and Loki on board, not to mention the possibility of a cure for his illness - all this led to a very busy time in Leonard's head. Lots of thinking, about the future, with or without him in it. Even more important, how he wanted to spend the time he had left. Looking around, he nodded at her bar area. "I see all the damage to your lounge has been rectified?"
"It has," she answered, a wry smile on her face. "Every time I think I've seen everything, I'm reminded yet again just how big and complicated this universe of ours really is."
"Did you know about Doctor Blake?" he asked,
"A little," she admitted. "I knew some of his past. I suspected more, but-" Shaking her head, Guinan just shrugged, taking a seat next to Leonard. "I like Donald. I've known him for a long time. He's a good person and I've never known him to be intentionally cruel or hurtful. There is a reason why he studies medicine." Leonard waited for her to offer something about Loki, but she didn't.
"You've been around for a long time, haven't you?" he asked softly, wondering just how old she was. Leonard didn't think Guinan would take the question the wrong way.
"A little over five hundred years now," she told him, taking a sip of her own tall glass of tea. The look on Leonard's face made her laugh. "Yes, I suppose that seems like a long time to you."
"It does," he told her with a grin. It puts a whole new perspective on things, for me at least. "I've been told that I'm dying," he said, watching her eyes sadden at that news. "About ten months left, if the doctors are right. There might be a way out of this," he added, but even then... Another chuckle. "If I lived to a ripe old age, I've got maybe a hundred years in me after this. That's twenty percent of your lifespan."
"It does tend to reduce the need for hurrying up, knowing that there are years ahead of you." Guinan paused before asking her next question. "You talk about dying, Leonard, but you don't seem scared."
"Oh, I'm scared, but-" Sighing, he looked around. "I'd be leaving Jim behind. That bothers me more than anything."
"Its not easy, going on without someone you love."
A shadow crossed her face. "You've lost-"
"A couple of husbands, yes." There was a quiet moment when both of them held their drinks, not speaking. "But I went on," she finally continued, "and so would your Jim. What you have between you, that love you share, it never leaves you." Her eyes caught his. "Are you worried that he'd find someone else?
"Not as much as I thought I would be," he said honestly. "I'm sort of the jealous type," he chuckled. "But - I don't want him alone." The idea of Jim living without someone loving him hurt more than Leonard imagined.
But Guinan shook her head. "Not alone, never alone. It's not terrible, being by yourself for a while. He'll need that for a while, should something happen to you. But if he ever did find another, you aren't being replaced. Jim would be sharing what you had with someone else. The love never goes away."
Somehow, hearing that from her made him feel better. "I suppose," he murmured. "I don't want to die."
"Death is the next adventure. It comes to all of us." Her hands clasped together in front of her. "Having said that, I hope that chance comes through for you. I'd like to see you around the ship a few years longer."
That made him smile. "Me too, ma'am."
But at this moment, there were just some people taking their lunch, reading, talking quietly. Music played softly and all in all, Leonard thought it was an improvement to his nook. "Good afternoon, ma'am," Leonard said to Guinan as he entered the room, walking toward his favorite chair. "Busy this afternoon?"
"Not at all, Doctor. I think people are recovering from Doctor M'Benga's party last night. You and the captain were missed," she added with a warm smile. "How is he feeling?"
"Better, thank you."
"And you, Doctor? How are you doing?" she asked, bringing him a glass of sweet tea, an unexpected surprise. Something about the expression on her face told him that she thought something might be wrong with him, but she didn't press.
"Pretty good," he told her, surprised at how much he meant it. The last few days - between Jim being ill and their talk of marriage and the discovery of Thor and Loki on board, not to mention the possibility of a cure for his illness - all this led to a very busy time in Leonard's head. Lots of thinking, about the future, with or without him in it. Even more important, how he wanted to spend the time he had left. Looking around, he nodded at her bar area. "I see all the damage to your lounge has been rectified?"
"It has," she answered, a wry smile on her face. "Every time I think I've seen everything, I'm reminded yet again just how big and complicated this universe of ours really is."
"Did you know about Doctor Blake?" he asked,
"A little," she admitted. "I knew some of his past. I suspected more, but-" Shaking her head, Guinan just shrugged, taking a seat next to Leonard. "I like Donald. I've known him for a long time. He's a good person and I've never known him to be intentionally cruel or hurtful. There is a reason why he studies medicine." Leonard waited for her to offer something about Loki, but she didn't.
"You've been around for a long time, haven't you?" he asked softly, wondering just how old she was. Leonard didn't think Guinan would take the question the wrong way.
"A little over five hundred years now," she told him, taking a sip of her own tall glass of tea. The look on Leonard's face made her laugh. "Yes, I suppose that seems like a long time to you."
"It does," he told her with a grin. It puts a whole new perspective on things, for me at least. "I've been told that I'm dying," he said, watching her eyes sadden at that news. "About ten months left, if the doctors are right. There might be a way out of this," he added, but even then... Another chuckle. "If I lived to a ripe old age, I've got maybe a hundred years in me after this. That's twenty percent of your lifespan."
"It does tend to reduce the need for hurrying up, knowing that there are years ahead of you." Guinan paused before asking her next question. "You talk about dying, Leonard, but you don't seem scared."
"Oh, I'm scared, but-" Sighing, he looked around. "I'd be leaving Jim behind. That bothers me more than anything."
"Its not easy, going on without someone you love."
A shadow crossed her face. "You've lost-"
"A couple of husbands, yes." There was a quiet moment when both of them held their drinks, not speaking. "But I went on," she finally continued, "and so would your Jim. What you have between you, that love you share, it never leaves you." Her eyes caught his. "Are you worried that he'd find someone else?
"Not as much as I thought I would be," he said honestly. "I'm sort of the jealous type," he chuckled. "But - I don't want him alone." The idea of Jim living without someone loving him hurt more than Leonard imagined.
But Guinan shook her head. "Not alone, never alone. It's not terrible, being by yourself for a while. He'll need that for a while, should something happen to you. But if he ever did find another, you aren't being replaced. Jim would be sharing what you had with someone else. The love never goes away."
Somehow, hearing that from her made him feel better. "I suppose," he murmured. "I don't want to die."
"Death is the next adventure. It comes to all of us." Her hands clasped together in front of her. "Having said that, I hope that chance comes through for you. I'd like to see you around the ship a few years longer."
That made him smile. "Me too, ma'am."