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dcoutts

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Jul 17, 2003 21:24

I didn't relazie a picture posted to make a light joke would turn slightly controversial. Sorry ( Read more... )

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smazur July 17 2003, 19:20:14 UTC

Too polite, Duncan, way too polite. Be rude and stay around a lot longer, okay?

dcoutts July 17 2003, 19:21:45 UTC

I never said I was going to be polite or rude. I think it was polite the way he went about it though

smazur July 17 2003, 19:31:48 UTC

Maybe, but the emotional mess he left behind isn't polite.

Re: dcoutts July 17 2003, 19:36:21 UTC

But if it is release of stree for everyone else it is a worthy cause.

smazur July 17 2003, 19:43:40 UTC

No, it's not. I know his family would've rather had the stress than his suicide to deal with. And I know I don't know what you're going through, that I cannot possibly understand how you feel, but you have to know that the idea of losing you like this scares me senseless. You can't just go without a fight, Duncan.

Re: dcoutts July 17 2003, 19:53:00 UTC

It's just- I want- I need a certain quality of life, and if all I'm going to do is be sick- I don't want that. I couldn't live with that. If I can't do the things I love- make music, tour, play a few sports every now and then- why?

smazur July 17 2003, 20:00:11 UTC

But you don't know that it's going to happen like that yet. You can't give up when you don't even know the results. Unless you know for sure, just keep hoping because sometimes, when everything is gone, hope is all you have left to comfort you.

Re: dcoutts July 17 2003, 20:04:30 UTC

Like I asked Raine- how many times can you cheat faith? I knocked on wood in 1999 and I'm still here- I just feel ominous about this.

smazur July 17 2003, 20:11:04 UTC

As many times as you can, Duncan; you cheat death as many times as you can. Just waking up every morning is cheating death, so having faith that you'll make it is the ultimate way to tell death to take a hike. Hope is one of the few weapons we have to fight off the helplessness we feel every day. If we don't have that, we might as well destroy ourselves now.

Re: dcoutts July 17 2003, 20:14:39 UTC

You may want to re read those last couple senteces

smazur July 17 2003, 20:20:54 UTC

Then I'll have hope for you.

Re: dcoutts July 17 2003, 20:24:02 UTC

I guess you have that freedom Grinny.

smazur July 17 2003, 20:32:14 UTC

I guess I do, but other than my friendship, it's all I can offer you.

Re: dcoutts July 17 2003, 20:33:41 UTC

I understand that.

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