(no subject)
Sitting in the huge study, of the mansion he had rented in the hope that Victoria would leave London and come and stay with him. Or at least thats what he thought at the time. It seems so very long ago now, as though spending time with her is a warm brief interlude in his life where everything was right and anything was possible.
Staring at the blank screen in front of him, stretching out his long atheletic legs, knocking over some cd's he's had piled on the ground beside the desk for seemingly ages. The noise they make him as they tumble to the ground, snap out of his self induced dream like state.
I talked to Dominic Monaghan on aim a few days ago, and he got me thinking. Why do I still rent this bloody horrible huge place, when basically I’m on my own near enough all the time. It has so many rooms I doubt to be honest I’d ever even if things hadn’t turned out the way they have actually have used. I use three out of the twenty five rooms. The kitchen, the bathroom and this … the study.
Reading what he’s written, screwing up his face slightly because it seems rather pathetic and pitiful. After all, he had said he hadn’t joined merely to find out what Victoria was doing, but had he joined merely to feel close to her. To be able to read her entries, to know that she was still there even if they no longer talked or saw one another. The reason he clinged to this overbearing house that was cold, empty and devoid of anything personal or anything that had any meaning if he was, honest was because it was the last link with her. They’d sold their home in England, both coming out to Spain with the hope of a new life a new beginning; her career needed a boost so she’d traveled back to the UK.
They’d kept in touch over the phone, got together whenever they could, then bam … as the saying goes, like a bat out of hell, Jordan and her overly large personality struck. Seeking more attention announced on live television that she had decided to tell the whole world she had slept with, ‘a famous soccer star who’s wife and her didn’t get along’. At first they’d laughed if off, then the press got a hold of it and actually named him, Jordan refusing to say of course who the person was didn’t help to stop the rumors at all.
He knew he’d been in the wrong the moment he opened his mouth, Victoria had every right to ask him if it was true. Why he’d yelled at her and accused her of not trusting him and refused to answer, still confused him. It didn’t seem to matter just how much he wanted to make things right, he never did and seemed fated to continually make things worse.
I know I promised when I joined I wouldn’t chase after Vic and I wouldn’t attempt to annoy her or do pitiful replies on her journal merely to get her attention but I can’t help at least writing this much.
Vic, I miss you, you were my best friend, my first love and I will never stop loving you as long as I breath.
Walking under the moonlight
Walking under the stars
Thinking thoughts of you babe
Wonder where you are
Looking over the mountains
Looking over the skies
Dream a dream of tomorrow
Only love tells me why
You're my heart's desire
You're the end of the love
Reaching out to the fire
Fly on the wings of a dove
Dove...dove...dove...dove
Walking under the moonlight
Walking under the stars
Thinking thoughts of you babe
Wonder where you are
Looking over the mountains
Looking over the skies
Dream a dream of tomorrow
Only love tells me why
You're my heart's desire
You're the end of the love
Reaching out to the fire
Fly on the wings of a dove
Dove...dove...dove...dove
You're my heart's desire
You're the end of the love
Reaching out the fire
Fly on the wings of a dove
Dove...dove...dove...dove
Staring at the blank screen in front of him, stretching out his long atheletic legs, knocking over some cd's he's had piled on the ground beside the desk for seemingly ages. The noise they make him as they tumble to the ground, snap out of his self induced dream like state.
I talked to Dominic Monaghan on aim a few days ago, and he got me thinking. Why do I still rent this bloody horrible huge place, when basically I’m on my own near enough all the time. It has so many rooms I doubt to be honest I’d ever even if things hadn’t turned out the way they have actually have used. I use three out of the twenty five rooms. The kitchen, the bathroom and this … the study.
Reading what he’s written, screwing up his face slightly because it seems rather pathetic and pitiful. After all, he had said he hadn’t joined merely to find out what Victoria was doing, but had he joined merely to feel close to her. To be able to read her entries, to know that she was still there even if they no longer talked or saw one another. The reason he clinged to this overbearing house that was cold, empty and devoid of anything personal or anything that had any meaning if he was, honest was because it was the last link with her. They’d sold their home in England, both coming out to Spain with the hope of a new life a new beginning; her career needed a boost so she’d traveled back to the UK.
They’d kept in touch over the phone, got together whenever they could, then bam … as the saying goes, like a bat out of hell, Jordan and her overly large personality struck. Seeking more attention announced on live television that she had decided to tell the whole world she had slept with, ‘a famous soccer star who’s wife and her didn’t get along’. At first they’d laughed if off, then the press got a hold of it and actually named him, Jordan refusing to say of course who the person was didn’t help to stop the rumors at all.
He knew he’d been in the wrong the moment he opened his mouth, Victoria had every right to ask him if it was true. Why he’d yelled at her and accused her of not trusting him and refused to answer, still confused him. It didn’t seem to matter just how much he wanted to make things right, he never did and seemed fated to continually make things worse.
I know I promised when I joined I wouldn’t chase after Vic and I wouldn’t attempt to annoy her or do pitiful replies on her journal merely to get her attention but I can’t help at least writing this much.
Vic, I miss you, you were my best friend, my first love and I will never stop loving you as long as I breath.
Walking under the moonlight
Walking under the stars
Thinking thoughts of you babe
Wonder where you are
Looking over the mountains
Looking over the skies
Dream a dream of tomorrow
Only love tells me why
You're my heart's desire
You're the end of the love
Reaching out to the fire
Fly on the wings of a dove
Dove...dove...dove...dove
Walking under the moonlight
Walking under the stars
Thinking thoughts of you babe
Wonder where you are
Looking over the mountains
Looking over the skies
Dream a dream of tomorrow
Only love tells me why
You're my heart's desire
You're the end of the love
Reaching out to the fire
Fly on the wings of a dove
Dove...dove...dove...dove
You're my heart's desire
You're the end of the love
Reaching out the fire
Fly on the wings of a dove
Dove...dove...dove...dove