[ shot ] Crossing Over Time
done for: The Timeline Exchange @
yunchun_ywh
Title: Crossing Over Time
Timeline: Future, 2010
Setting: Korea
Pairing: Yunho / Yoochun
Genre: AU, Angst-ish fluff
Rating: PG13
Summary: “…the future we haven’t seen yet remains here.”
Length: 1790 words
A/N: the title, cut and the summary text was taken from Ayu Hamasaki’s Heaven. it was one of the songs that i listened to while writing this story. the other song was Kim Bum Soo and Park San Joo’s Man Woman [ asdfasfahgahwer awesome song! ]
i hope the composition doesn’t confuse anyone. mianhe~ i really wish i had the time and inspiration to not rush this. T_T
comments? i'm not exactly satisfied with how this one turned out. :c
“You know that’s bad for you.”
“Says who?”
“…”
“Take a puff.”
“What? NO!”
“Come on. Just a puff.”
The cold night breeze played with the soft strands of hair that fell on Yunho’s forehead. He walked through the busy streets of Seoul with a cigarette in his hand, trying to smoke the cold away.
Yunho hated it when Yoochun smoked. It damaged Yoochun’s body in more ways than one, and it made him reek with the smell of tobacco.
Whenever Yoochun came to hug him, he fought the urge to push him back.
He had on four layers of clothing. Yunho thought (he bought it for a reason, after all,) that his jacket was thick enough to keep him warm. The scarf wrapped around his neck, and the gloves covering his hands, should’ve been able to provide the warmth that the loose spaces of his jacket couldn’t give.
But still, the cold seeped through. He pulled at his collar after taking one last drag from his cigarette, and zipped the jacket up as far as it could go. He rubbed his hands up and down his arms to generate heat, before tucking them inside his pockets.
The stick was dangled lazily in front of Yunho, and he looked at it as if it was going to pounce on him at any second.
Yunho didn’t want to smoke.
A few more seconds of silence later, Yoochun gave up. He sighed, and was about to put the cigarette back between his lips, when Yunho snatched it from his fingers.
Tonight was pretty much like every other night he had spent walking around the city. He passed by the same roads, checked out the same stores, and almost always stopped for a smoke at the same places.
It had been so long since the last time he did something out of the ordinary - the last time he did something for the first time.
Yoochun grinned as Yunho coughed through the smoke, his lungs rejecting the intrusion.
“I still don’t understand what you find so fascinating about this.”
“I wouldn’t call it fascinating, Yunho. But it’s relaxing.”
“Sure… if you call torturing yourself, relaxing.”
Life for Yunho had become mediocre. It was more of a routine now rather than an experience. Nothing was ever new.
He still lived in the same apartment building as before. The smell of many months behind closed and protected doors had started to become unsettling. But even so, Yunho couldn’t bring himself to leave. He had nowhere else to go.
“You’re not a natural smoker.”
“…not, a what?”
“A natural smoker...”
“Is there even such a thing?!”
Yunho almost took a step back because of the look Yoochun suddenly gave him. He wasn’t sure how to put it, but there was something about the smile - no, the smirk - that formed in Yoochun’s lips that made him feel uneasy.
“Some lungs are capable of handling smoke, right off the bat. Some lungs still need to be taught.”
As he turned a familiar corner, stomping onto his usual street, Yunho didn’t expect to see a familiar face - well, at least not this one.
“Younha…”
At that point, Yunho was quite positive he wanted to run away. If only his legs could let him move.
Yunho couldn’t think of how he got where he was. His brain was trying to function, but the nibbling was being a painfully addicting distraction.
All his senses were on overdrive. Being pinned between the soft cushion of his bed, and the hard - rough, demanding - pressure of Yoochun’s hips was making Yunho crazy.
“Yoochun, st-…”
“Shut up and kiss me.”
He shouldn't have. Yunho knew he wasn't supposed to. But he did, anyway.
Yunho finally opened his mouth for Yoochun. He welcomed the unfamiliar warmth with abandon, letting himself drown in something he never even thought of experiencing before.
He could taste a hint of peppermint on Yoochun’s tongue. It mingled with the aftertaste of smoke and nicotine and Yoochun, the bittersweet taste making Yunho hate the horrid habit just a little less.
“Off. Now. Please...”
The urgency in Yoochun’s voice would’ve surprised Yunho. But he was almost as eager to take his shirt off as well (if not more.)
Yoochun could’ve torn it from his chest and he wouldn’t have cared.
“How have you been?” Yunho tried to ask as if it was only appropriate to.
It had been over a year since the day they last saw each other. The awkwardness that was building itself around them now was a product of that day.
“I’ve been good,” She nodded lightly, cradling the cup of convenience store coffee between her hands. “…how about you?”
She hadn’t changed at all. She still wore the same short hairstyle - thin locks still tucked behind her left ear. She still had the same smile, her eyes still filled with the same sincerity as before.
Younha still carried herself with an ease that was every bit disarming.
And Yunho fell in love with her, back then, because of it.
Experienced hands roamed all over Yunho’s body. Every corner, every dip, every curve and bump - Yoochun engraved them all in his mind by touch.
One hand soon found a place to rest on Yunho’s chest. The other hand slid behind Yunho’s neck, Yoochun’s slender fingers curling through dark brown hair to deepen the kiss.
For the first time in a long time, Yunho walked home with a smile on his face.
Finally being able to talk to Younha didn’t make him feel any less of a jackass, but he was happy to hear that she was doing just fine. Better, even.
Yunho figured her mother would still be angry at him. He didn’t expect any of them to forgive him after what he did. And Younha’s forgiveness was the one he didn’t expect the most.
He thought he didn’t deserve it - not from her family (nor his), and most especially not from Younha.
His rash decisions affected too many people. And although all things had been settled (just lately), Yunho still felt he didn’t deserve absolution.
Not even indifference.
Their hands found each other eventually - both set of fingers naturally filling the gaps between them with their own.
“Yunho…”
Seeing Younha again might’ve overwhelmed him. But this, this was close to giving Yunho a heart attack.
He stepped out of the elevator to find a figure crouched by his door. At first, it was hard for him to make out whether it was a man or a woman. (Long wavy hair fought against taught muscles and broad shoulders.) But the moment the sound of his footsteps called for its attention, Yunho realized it was a man. And it wasn’t just any man, either.
“Yoochun…”
Yunho broke the kiss to catch his breath, and Yoochun moved to rest his head on the crook of Yunho’s neck. Seeing and feeling Yunho’s sweat-glistened skin against his lips, Yoochun wasn’t able to stop himself from sticking his tongue out and having a taste.
The sudden gesture caused Yunho to buck his hips involuntarily - the unexpected (but much needed) friction making Yoochun moan and tighten his grip on Yunho’s hands.
A thick air of tension surrounded them in the silence of Yunho’s living room.
Their separation was longer than Yunho and Younha’s. More weeks stood between them and it was harder to reach out. Too much hurt held together the wall that time had built, and it might take just as much to break it down.
Something cold dug in between two of Yoochun’s fingers within the tight grip.
It stung them both, but it didn’t take much thought for Yoochun to realize what it was. And it wasn't long before Yunho remembered it, too.
-
“I thought- I thought you…”
Yunho missed hearing that voice. He could remember how Yoochun lulled him to sleep, mumbling sweet nothings in his ear. He could remember how Yoochun sang to him countless times before. Yoochun’s voice calmed him, soothed him - his voice used to declare love.
Now, it was full of hesitation. Yunho could hear the fear in Yoochun’s voice. Long kept pain held Yoochun back from saying what he really wanted to say. Doubt and uncertainty echoed in Yoochun’s shaky voice, and it broke Yunho’s heart.
“I didn’t.”
Tears were already threatening to fall from Yoochun’s eyes even before he looked at Yunho.
There was the man he vowed never to see again.
Yoochun wanted nothing to do with him, he wanted to lose him completely - to forget Yunho - but he never did. He thought the pain would’ve been enough if the distance couldn’t suffice, but neither made Yoochun’s heart stop beating for the same man who broke it.
He came back to put an end to everything. Yoochun came back, expecting his heart to be stepped on and thrown away, never to feel again. It was the only way to get his life back, he thought - the only way for him to get peace of mind.
Seeing a different Yunho from the Yunho he had expected to see, wasn’t part of the plan. Driving to the same apartment rather than to a different house, seemed out of place for Yoochun.
And hearing Yunho’s answer - one that was far from the long explanation he had prepared himself to hear - caught Yoochun off guard.
“But I saw you… Everyone was there, it was-”
“I bet you didn’t even stay for longer than a minute.” Yunho stated a-matter-of-factly as he watched Yoochun sink into his seat. “You should’ve stayed and watched. It was utter chaos, and I was in the middle of it. You would’ve been proud.”
The mocking tone was evident in Yunho’s voice. Yoochun couldn’t believe Yunho still had it in him to joke around under these circumstances. But nonetheless, it gave him some sort of comfort too.
“I had to leave.” He didn’t feel the need to explain himself before, but Yoochun’s tongue seemed to have formed an alliance with his heart.
“You didn’t have to. You just did.” Yunho said, leaning back on the sofa as he felt the tension being lifted from the room, bit by painful bit.
-
“Why didn’t you, Yunho?”
It came out sounding like a plea, and Yoochun hated himself for not having enough control to at least pretend that he wasn’t hurting anymore.
Yunho heard the desperation in Yoochun’s voice. He wanted to pull Yoochun to his chest and hold him - again, like he used to. But he knew healing didn't come instantly. So instead, Yunho cleared his throat (opened his heart) to give Yoochun the answer he needed to hear.
“I couldn’t do it.”
"Don't go..."
And Yunho hoped, for a new beginning, that it was enough.
“I won’t.”
____
FIN
____
yunchun_ywh
Title: Crossing Over Time
Timeline: Future, 2010
Setting: Korea
Pairing: Yunho / Yoochun
Genre: AU, Angst-ish fluff
Rating: PG13
Summary: “…the future we haven’t seen yet remains here.”
Length: 1790 words
A/N: the title, cut and the summary text was taken from Ayu Hamasaki’s Heaven. it was one of the songs that i listened to while writing this story. the other song was Kim Bum Soo and Park San Joo’s Man Woman [ asdfasfahgahwer awesome song! ]
i hope the composition doesn’t confuse anyone. mianhe~ i really wish i had the time and inspiration to not rush this. T_T
comments? i'm not exactly satisfied with how this one turned out. :c
“You know that’s bad for you.”
“Says who?”
“…”
“Take a puff.”
“What? NO!”
“Come on. Just a puff.”
The cold night breeze played with the soft strands of hair that fell on Yunho’s forehead. He walked through the busy streets of Seoul with a cigarette in his hand, trying to smoke the cold away.
Yunho hated it when Yoochun smoked. It damaged Yoochun’s body in more ways than one, and it made him reek with the smell of tobacco.
Whenever Yoochun came to hug him, he fought the urge to push him back.
He had on four layers of clothing. Yunho thought (he bought it for a reason, after all,) that his jacket was thick enough to keep him warm. The scarf wrapped around his neck, and the gloves covering his hands, should’ve been able to provide the warmth that the loose spaces of his jacket couldn’t give.
But still, the cold seeped through. He pulled at his collar after taking one last drag from his cigarette, and zipped the jacket up as far as it could go. He rubbed his hands up and down his arms to generate heat, before tucking them inside his pockets.
The stick was dangled lazily in front of Yunho, and he looked at it as if it was going to pounce on him at any second.
Yunho didn’t want to smoke.
A few more seconds of silence later, Yoochun gave up. He sighed, and was about to put the cigarette back between his lips, when Yunho snatched it from his fingers.
Tonight was pretty much like every other night he had spent walking around the city. He passed by the same roads, checked out the same stores, and almost always stopped for a smoke at the same places.
It had been so long since the last time he did something out of the ordinary - the last time he did something for the first time.
Yoochun grinned as Yunho coughed through the smoke, his lungs rejecting the intrusion.
“I still don’t understand what you find so fascinating about this.”
“I wouldn’t call it fascinating, Yunho. But it’s relaxing.”
“Sure… if you call torturing yourself, relaxing.”
Life for Yunho had become mediocre. It was more of a routine now rather than an experience. Nothing was ever new.
He still lived in the same apartment building as before. The smell of many months behind closed and protected doors had started to become unsettling. But even so, Yunho couldn’t bring himself to leave. He had nowhere else to go.
“You’re not a natural smoker.”
“…not, a what?”
“A natural smoker...”
“Is there even such a thing?!”
Yunho almost took a step back because of the look Yoochun suddenly gave him. He wasn’t sure how to put it, but there was something about the smile - no, the smirk - that formed in Yoochun’s lips that made him feel uneasy.
“Some lungs are capable of handling smoke, right off the bat. Some lungs still need to be taught.”
As he turned a familiar corner, stomping onto his usual street, Yunho didn’t expect to see a familiar face - well, at least not this one.
“Younha…”
At that point, Yunho was quite positive he wanted to run away. If only his legs could let him move.
Yunho couldn’t think of how he got where he was. His brain was trying to function, but the nibbling was being a painfully addicting distraction.
All his senses were on overdrive. Being pinned between the soft cushion of his bed, and the hard - rough, demanding - pressure of Yoochun’s hips was making Yunho crazy.
“Yoochun, st-…”
“Shut up and kiss me.”
He shouldn't have. Yunho knew he wasn't supposed to. But he did, anyway.
Yunho finally opened his mouth for Yoochun. He welcomed the unfamiliar warmth with abandon, letting himself drown in something he never even thought of experiencing before.
He could taste a hint of peppermint on Yoochun’s tongue. It mingled with the aftertaste of smoke and nicotine and Yoochun, the bittersweet taste making Yunho hate the horrid habit just a little less.
“Off. Now. Please...”
The urgency in Yoochun’s voice would’ve surprised Yunho. But he was almost as eager to take his shirt off as well (if not more.)
Yoochun could’ve torn it from his chest and he wouldn’t have cared.
“How have you been?” Yunho tried to ask as if it was only appropriate to.
It had been over a year since the day they last saw each other. The awkwardness that was building itself around them now was a product of that day.
“I’ve been good,” She nodded lightly, cradling the cup of convenience store coffee between her hands. “…how about you?”
She hadn’t changed at all. She still wore the same short hairstyle - thin locks still tucked behind her left ear. She still had the same smile, her eyes still filled with the same sincerity as before.
Younha still carried herself with an ease that was every bit disarming.
And Yunho fell in love with her, back then, because of it.
Experienced hands roamed all over Yunho’s body. Every corner, every dip, every curve and bump - Yoochun engraved them all in his mind by touch.
One hand soon found a place to rest on Yunho’s chest. The other hand slid behind Yunho’s neck, Yoochun’s slender fingers curling through dark brown hair to deepen the kiss.
For the first time in a long time, Yunho walked home with a smile on his face.
Finally being able to talk to Younha didn’t make him feel any less of a jackass, but he was happy to hear that she was doing just fine. Better, even.
Yunho figured her mother would still be angry at him. He didn’t expect any of them to forgive him after what he did. And Younha’s forgiveness was the one he didn’t expect the most.
He thought he didn’t deserve it - not from her family (nor his), and most especially not from Younha.
His rash decisions affected too many people. And although all things had been settled (just lately), Yunho still felt he didn’t deserve absolution.
Not even indifference.
Their hands found each other eventually - both set of fingers naturally filling the gaps between them with their own.
“Yunho…”
Seeing Younha again might’ve overwhelmed him. But this, this was close to giving Yunho a heart attack.
He stepped out of the elevator to find a figure crouched by his door. At first, it was hard for him to make out whether it was a man or a woman. (Long wavy hair fought against taught muscles and broad shoulders.) But the moment the sound of his footsteps called for its attention, Yunho realized it was a man. And it wasn’t just any man, either.
“Yoochun…”
Yunho broke the kiss to catch his breath, and Yoochun moved to rest his head on the crook of Yunho’s neck. Seeing and feeling Yunho’s sweat-glistened skin against his lips, Yoochun wasn’t able to stop himself from sticking his tongue out and having a taste.
The sudden gesture caused Yunho to buck his hips involuntarily - the unexpected (but much needed) friction making Yoochun moan and tighten his grip on Yunho’s hands.
A thick air of tension surrounded them in the silence of Yunho’s living room.
Their separation was longer than Yunho and Younha’s. More weeks stood between them and it was harder to reach out. Too much hurt held together the wall that time had built, and it might take just as much to break it down.
Something cold dug in between two of Yoochun’s fingers within the tight grip.
It stung them both, but it didn’t take much thought for Yoochun to realize what it was. And it wasn't long before Yunho remembered it, too.
-
“I thought- I thought you…”
Yunho missed hearing that voice. He could remember how Yoochun lulled him to sleep, mumbling sweet nothings in his ear. He could remember how Yoochun sang to him countless times before. Yoochun’s voice calmed him, soothed him - his voice used to declare love.
Now, it was full of hesitation. Yunho could hear the fear in Yoochun’s voice. Long kept pain held Yoochun back from saying what he really wanted to say. Doubt and uncertainty echoed in Yoochun’s shaky voice, and it broke Yunho’s heart.
“I didn’t.”
Tears were already threatening to fall from Yoochun’s eyes even before he looked at Yunho.
There was the man he vowed never to see again.
Yoochun wanted nothing to do with him, he wanted to lose him completely - to forget Yunho - but he never did. He thought the pain would’ve been enough if the distance couldn’t suffice, but neither made Yoochun’s heart stop beating for the same man who broke it.
He came back to put an end to everything. Yoochun came back, expecting his heart to be stepped on and thrown away, never to feel again. It was the only way to get his life back, he thought - the only way for him to get peace of mind.
Seeing a different Yunho from the Yunho he had expected to see, wasn’t part of the plan. Driving to the same apartment rather than to a different house, seemed out of place for Yoochun.
And hearing Yunho’s answer - one that was far from the long explanation he had prepared himself to hear - caught Yoochun off guard.
“But I saw you… Everyone was there, it was-”
“I bet you didn’t even stay for longer than a minute.” Yunho stated a-matter-of-factly as he watched Yoochun sink into his seat. “You should’ve stayed and watched. It was utter chaos, and I was in the middle of it. You would’ve been proud.”
The mocking tone was evident in Yunho’s voice. Yoochun couldn’t believe Yunho still had it in him to joke around under these circumstances. But nonetheless, it gave him some sort of comfort too.
“I had to leave.” He didn’t feel the need to explain himself before, but Yoochun’s tongue seemed to have formed an alliance with his heart.
“You didn’t have to. You just did.” Yunho said, leaning back on the sofa as he felt the tension being lifted from the room, bit by painful bit.
-
“Why didn’t you, Yunho?”
It came out sounding like a plea, and Yoochun hated himself for not having enough control to at least pretend that he wasn’t hurting anymore.
Yunho heard the desperation in Yoochun’s voice. He wanted to pull Yoochun to his chest and hold him - again, like he used to. But he knew healing didn't come instantly. So instead, Yunho cleared his throat (opened his heart) to give Yoochun the answer he needed to hear.
“I couldn’t do it.”
"Don't go..."
And Yunho hoped, for a new beginning, that it was enough.
“I won’t.”
____
FIN
____